What Is Your Most Gross, Yucky, Disgusting Nursing Horror Story?

Here is my most gross, yucky, disgusting nursing story! Nurses Humor Article

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I was working a night shift on a tele floor as a new Nurse.

We had this one poor old lady who was confused and was restrained as usual for her safety. She was our designated resident nightmare geri from hell, so she was placed near the Nurse's station.

So we are chilling out at the Nurse's station, chatting and trying to get through another night...

Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I see our lady in question standing in the dimly lit doorway of her room!

I instantly leap out and run to her. As I approach her, she appears to be falling towards me, so I meet her in a bear hug...my arms around her waste, and her arms around my shoulders.

As I catch the lady, I notice a very strong smell of feces, and I feel something warm on my hands, arms and shoulders...

My fellow heroes come in behind me, and as the lights are turned on, my worst fears are instantly realized.

Yes, I caught the poor old lady with a good old bear hung football catch, but I was also covered in the lady's feces.

As I look at her, she has feces smeared all over her arms and hands... (and even her face!)

And of course, now so did I! :D

Specializes in PICU/Pedi.
may ask one of you vet techs a quick question?

we got two of our furkids from a no-kill shelter where they had been born. they're littermates. they were 14 weeks when we got them. that was almost 10 years ago. our vet was on medical leave and the sub who did their update vaccinations and rabies shots last week said they, in all likelihood, had different fathers.

huh? can the same litter of kittens really have multiple fathers? :confused:

a-n-d now

back to our regularly scheduled discussion... :cool: :D

kathy

shar pei mom:paw::paw:

multiples in humans can have different fathers. i have a set of twins, and one of the books about twins i have says that it is possible for fraternal twins to have different fathers, if there are two eggs present and the mother has sex with more than one man in a short time period (don't remember the specific time period). it's very uncommon, but possible. (mine have the same father, btw. ;))

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Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.
multiples in humans can have different fathers. i have a set of twins, and one of the books about twins i have says that it is possible for fraternal twins to have different fathers, if there are two eggs present and the mother has sex with more than one man in a short time period (don't remember the specific time period). it's very uncommon, but possible. (mine have the same father, btw. ;))

i was a triplet. i had identical twin brothers that did not survive because they were conjoined and, as a result, i've always been fascinated with multiple births. i'm sure that given this mama kitty's lifestyle on the street, she mated more than once.

thanks for answering my question.

kathy

shar pei mom:paw::paw:

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Specializes in PICU/Pedi.
i was a triplet. i had identical twin brothers that did not survive because they were conjoined and, as a result, i've always been facinated with multiple births. i'm sure that given this mama kitty's lifestyle on the street, she mated more than once.

thanks for answering my question.

kathy

shar pei mom:paw::paw:

wow! that's very interesting. i have always been interested in multiples, as well. i was very surprised to learn that twins can have different fathers. in fact, because of that, they can also be different races, if one father is one race and the other father is another race. genetics are so fascinating, aren't they?

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Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.

genetics can be so interesting to study. when my husband and i had had several unsuccessful pregnancies, we underwent genetic testing and after many many tests and questions, were told that we're too genetically similar to have a healthy baby. weird, because we're unrelated, different nationalities,

grew up in different geographic areas, neither of us is adopted. while we don't look alike at all, the first time my mom met my husband, she said (when he was out of the room) that he could almost have been her son, based on hair and skin tone, eye color.

kathy

shar pei mom:paw::paw:

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Specializes in PICU/Pedi.
genetics can be so interesting to study. when my husband and i had had several unsuccessful pregnancies, we underwent genetic testing and after many many tests and questions, were told that we're too genetically similar to have a healthy baby. weird, because we're unrelated, different nationalities,

grew up in different geographic areas, neither of us is adopted. while we don't look alike at all, the first time my mom met my husband, she said (when he was out of the room) that he could almost have been her son, based on hair and skin tone, eye color.

kathy

shar pei mom:paw::paw:

that's strange! but yes, the results of the genetic lottery are very intriguing.

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FYI my dear nurses: when someone leaves a tampon in for 3+ months, do not send the tampon in a cup for a culture. Just swab the green, yellow, black, & gray mucus off of it and throw it away; because that is what the lab is gonna do anyway. It smells to high hell.

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may ask one of you vet techs a quick question?

we got two of our furkids from a no-kill shelter where they had been born. they're littermates. they were 14 weeks when we got them. that was almost 10 years ago. our vet was on medical leave and the sub who did their update vaccinations and rabies shots last week said they, in all likelihood, had different fathers.

huh? can the same litter of kittens really have multiple fathers? :confused:

a-n-d now

back to our regularly scheduled discussion... :cool: :D

kathy

shar pei mom:paw::paw:

not only is the answer yes, but there have been several documented cases of fraternal twins who did not have the same father. in most of the ones i have read about, it was obvious because the fathers were not the same race, but in one case, the mother's guess as to which child belonged to which father was incorrect.

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HI, Im new here but this discussion caught my eye, morbid curiosity i suppose.;) I have only been in this industry for 6 years, but in that time I feel like I have seen a life time's worth of gross. I have a couple stories to share.

Once my fellow co worker and I were giving a patient a bed bath and she was a lady that refused to shower in the entire 2 weeks she was with us, we had hidden her clothes so she would not wear her urine soaked sweater any longer. I digress, my colleague is cleaning her up and she starts to moan, being the young and innocent minded one, I asked if she was in pain, and she says.." Don't mind me MOANING its from the PLEASURE you girls are giving me, I just get so aroused." We finished and in the hall way I kept calling my friend Magic Fingers.

On that note I once had a pt that was a very large lady, to my recollection about 670lbs. When I would bathe her, she would moan and tell me I wasn't cleaning her enough and I needed to get deeper, and she jsut kept saying deeper go deeper, and after throwing up a little in my mouth, and being groped by this woman, I ended the shower.

I have a few more jems, but dont really feel like typing them out, maybe later?!! All of the stories I read before this were awesome , in that cringe-worthy kind of way.

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Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..
HI, Im new here but this discussion caught my eye, morbid curiosity i suppose.;) I have only been in this industry for 6 years, but in that time I feel like I have seen a life time's worth of gross. I have a couple stories to share.

Once my fellow co worker and I were giving a patient a bed bath and she was a lady that refused to shower in the entire 2 weeks she was with us, we had hidden her clothes so she would not wear her urine soaked sweater any longer. I digress, my colleague is cleaning her up and she starts to moan, being the young and innocent minded one, I asked if she was in pain, and she says.." Don't mind me MOANING its from the PLEASURE you girls are giving me, I just get so aroused." We finished and in the hall way I kept calling my friend Magic Fingers.

On that note I once had a pt that was a very large lady, to my recollection about 670lbs. When I would bathe her, she would moan and tell me I wasn't cleaning her enough and I needed to get deeper, and she jsut kept saying deeper go deeper, and being groped by this woman, I ended the shower.

:yeah::lol2::rotfl: You mean you didn't use your :lol2:magic fingers forcefully enough??? :yeah:Thank you for the huge laugh!!:D
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Specializes in Mostly geri :).

You KNOW you're in the medical field when you can read all these stories while eating and not drop a crumb.

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Specializes in Med Surg-Geriatrics.

The sickest I ever got was stepping off the elevator and the patients room directly across from me was drinking his denture water,when I mentioned it to my supervisor she started wretching and gagging (that was the funniest part!

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Specializes in LTC, CPR instructor, First aid instructor..
The sickest I ever got was stepping off the elevator and the patients room directly across from me was drinking his denture water,when I mentioned it to my supervisor she started wretching and gagging (that was the funniest part!
:hhmth::hhmth::rotfl:
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