What Does This Supervisor's Behavior Mean?

[Weeping Willow]

I have asked for a couple of saved time days off along with my regular day off so I can take care of some personal matters in the near future and have given her 3 choices (to make it easy for her to pick the best one for her staffing needs) of when I could go, I have gotten my own substitute and we filled out the paperwork so we could prove that the sub is willing to take my shifts.

The supervisor says no . I ask her to help me figure out when my request would be possible to have. She can't.

I call the sub and tell her it looks like it's no-go. She calls the supervisor and calls me back shortly, saying that the supervisor said that if she wants to do it, she will approve it. I confirmed this with the boss. What??? Why is she willing to do it for her but not for me????

What should I conclude from this? We've never had words or any problem that I know of. :uhoh3::uhoh21:

[TazziRN, RN]

Your coworker may have argued your point and gotten the supervisor to see that there was no reason to decline your request. Let it go. If it happens again, then go to the supervisor and ask about it.

[Katnip, RN]

The best way to find out what the supervisor means by it is to ask her directly. Just write down exactly what you asked for and how you were denied, then state when your co-worker asked for the same thing, she got it. Don't get emotional, just ask her why it worked that way.

We can't read her mind, and none of us here know what your relationship with your supervisor really is.

[StrwbryblndRN]

Don't you hate it when something happens and it makes you wonder "what the Heck!"

Happens to me all the time. My best suggestion is to do what everyone else said and approach her if it is getting to you. Could be more simple than you think.

Could be your manager has alot of her plate and could not think it through. Could be very hormonal and we all know what that is like. The choices are endless.

Good luck with it.

[llg, PhD, RN]

It was probably just a misunderstanding. Since you gave her multiple choices, she may have ben a little confused about what you were asking for. For example, she may have thought you wanted all three choices.

If you decide to approach her, do so in the spirit of learning how to communicate better with her. Ask her nicely whether or not there were any problems with your original request and whether she has any suggestions on how you might have submitted it differently so that she could have felt comfortable approving it for you. Give her a chance to be decent about it and explain her point-of-view rather than putting her on the defensive with an aggressive or accusatory approach, ("Why did you approve it for her and not for me?")

[ebear, BSN, RN]

Yes, that is correct..and it sure is hard to learn how to handle. A lot of the difficulties of the field are these types of issues that are not nursing issues, they are communicative issues. It is a difficult field to navigate and sometimes results in one banging their head on a wall (been there). I've had a few apples out of this bag, too. I really don't want to sound so bitter here. This is where somebody is dropping the ball and nurses are just burning up. We CARE and sometimes WE CARE to our own detriment. Occasionally, it becomes necessary to "cut to the chase" but don't go there until you're forced to and the above approach has not accomplished your goal.

ebear

[Weeping Willow]

Yes, thank you all for replying. I thooght of those choices, too, but could not draw a conclusion. I guess I'll just push it to the side and keep on going. Like the bunny with the drum, you know, LOL.

[caliotter3]

It's probably better left alone. You could be approaching her in the best manner and with good intentions, but chances of her seeing it as non-threatening are slim. Just be careful about how you are treated in the future. Sooner or later, you will be able to figure out where you stand with this person. Good luck.