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I know how you feel...I work in an extremely urban community and in the last 2 weeks we've had 2 pediatric codes...7 year old and a 12 year old, both shot...one died one is still clinging to life...What a world we live in today...Its hard sometimes keeping a clear head knowing that no matter how hard you work and how many lives we may save...It only takes one lost life to bring on such a rush of emotion that you feel like you are helpless...hang in there...
Please talk with us or someone else that you trust. I work in a very inner city hospital and we (unfortunately) have pedi codes often. It always is a rough day! Critical Incident Stress Debriefing is never unpopular either. Please take care of yourself - you must do that in order to help others.
I just needed to post this to help clear my head a little. I don't want to get into too much detail, but we had a young adult code over the weekend and it was so sad. The sig. other was in the room at the time and we worked the patient for about an hour and a half. It almost reminded me of a megacode because we saw several different rhythems and gave so many different meds and even had to defib.I guess this code was very hard for me to handle afterwards because the patient left behind the sig. other and very young children - it just really broke my heart. I think the only other code that was quite this emotional for me was a peds. code, but that was 3 years ago.
I've been lucky during my years in the ED to have not seen too many peds or young adult codes...but I guess that is why this one affected me so much. Thanks in advance for listening...you guys are great and I knew you would be able to understand.
I agree with the post code debriefing. You don't need to "carry" this around with you.
I had a 14y/o in the ER who hung himself, and I can't get any of it out of my mind - the smells, sounds, people - everything. That was 8 years ago.
I am so so sorry that this happened. But I thank you for posting about this.
I'm still a student and during my ED rotation a couple of months ago .... they brought a woman in, 39 years old, she had a seizure and fell out of bed, was in a-fib when the medics arrived. They brought her into the ED, CPR in progress .... that was the first time I'd ever seen anything like that. They actually let us do chest compressions. She ended up dying, and then the doctor had to go tell her 18 year old daughter, that was waiting in the waiting room. The nurses just all seemed like it was no big deal .... our instructors pulled us out afterwards to talk about it, we were all crying. I was just thinking how terribly sad, because she was young and her poor daughter.
Again, thank you for sharing this here with us. BIG HUGS for you :icon_hug:
Raindreamer - the way the ER nurses reacted wasn't callousness on their part - it is a coping measure. It helps us to tolerate more sadness than people should sometimes endure. I know that earlier this year, we had 3 pediatric traumatic arrests within an 18 hour period. To the outside world (we are a teaching hospital and have loads of students) it would seem we were pretty cool and collected. However, we all grieve in our own ways - just because we don't cry (at least publicly) it doesn't mean that we don't feel bad. I hope that you pursue ER nursing - it can be very rewarding.
Spacklehead, MSN, NP
620 Posts
I just needed to post this to help clear my head a little. I don't want to get into too much detail, but we had a young adult code over the weekend and it was so sad. The sig. other was in the room at the time and we worked the patient for about an hour and a half. It almost reminded me of a megacode because we saw several different rhythems and gave so many different meds and even had to defib.
I guess this code was very hard for me to handle afterwards because the patient left behind the sig. other and very young children - it just really broke my heart. I think the only other code that was quite this emotional for me was a peds. code, but that was 3 years ago.
I've been lucky during my years in the ED to have not seen too many peds or young adult codes...but I guess that is why this one affected me so much. Thanks in advance for listening...you guys are great and I knew you would be able to understand.