Turmoil with salary vs lifestyle - need advice.

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marsy

20 Posts

Specializes in Psych, I/DD.

I live in NYC and therefore make a nursing salary so I can identify with you. One of my other friends (a nurse) works in a hospital and does home care as well so she makes over 100k without having to go back to school thus more loans. She owns a house, car, goes on lots of vacations, and is saving up 50k to have a baby (she has a medical condition which may leave her out during/after pregnancy) Although I would say to you make sure you marry or live with someone who makes a good salary, her husband does not make nearly half of what she does. At times she gets stressed out because shes basically the bread winner paying all the bills and saving for a family but shes totally in love (they're so cute together) So how is she doing all of this? Picking up hours doing home care (so many places need home care nurses) and she has a 3 apartment property. She lives in one 3 bedroom apartemnt and rents out another 3 bedroom and 1 bedroom. This basically pays her mortage and utilities. Honestly, you're doing the right thing now, living at home and saving for a good down payment. You really shouldn't stress about things now and the thought of potentially living pay check to pay check. It seems like you're money savvy and know what you're doing. Keep on the right track of saving and best of luck!

llg, PhD, RN

13,469 Posts

Specializes in Nursing Professional Development.

Dear OP,

You sound like someone who is reasonable, sensible, etc. So I am not saying you have been a spendthrift or anything like that. But you've got to sit down with a paper and pencil (or on the computer, or whatever) and make up a strict budget -- and then stick to it. That means making sacrifices in some areas to meet your highest priorites.

For example, if you want some savings at the end of each month -- you may have to drive a cheaper car, one you can afford to buy without taking out a loan! It might mean economizing on the grocery bills by eating cheaper food. It might mean having fewer cable TV stations, or giving up some of your cell phone expenses, or giving up the gourmet coffee, or whatever other things you now buy that are non-necessities.

As a general rule, nursing does not provide a "luxury class" lifestyle. It provides a middle class lifestyle. If you choose to live in one of the most expensive cities in the world, then you have to expect that your middle class lifestyle will not be so glamorous as that of the people around you. That's one of the things you need to simply acknowledge as "the truth," accept it, make you decisions based on your priorities, and then live with the consequences of those decisions.

As other people have said ... a nursing salary will stretch further in other communities. Someone who is fairly good with money can have "the American Dream" as a nurse in many communities. If that's your top priority, then you should consider relocating. If living in NYC is your top priority, accept the fact that NYC comes at a premium price -- and a nursing salary will allow you to live safely there, but without some of the material things you want unless you work extra to earn extra money.

As I think you already realize, it's just a matter of determining your priorities in life.

Also, recognize that sometimes, priorities change as we experience more of life.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

IcanHealYou

174 Posts

Specializes in Medicine.

Thank you everyone for the advice, greatly appreciated.

Specializes in ED, Pedi Vasc access, Paramedic serving 6 towns.

hi,

icanhealyou you have to live within your means, always remember that, or else you will quickly be over your head with debt! only use the credit cards if you can pay it off when the statement comes in, this will help your credit score and save you money on interest. do not make large purchases on credit cards, ever, unless you can pay them off when the statement comes. remember that credit card charges add up really quick and you can be in over your head before you know it! if you don't have the cash, then do not buy it! (with the exception of a home and car of course as long as you can afford the payments without having to work two jobs)

i am not sure where you live, but you seem to be making decent money. i gross about 65,000 ish a year before taxes and i have a mortgage (1278 a month) and a car payment (419 a month) a student loan (167.00) condo fee 175.00 a month plus utilities and cell phone bills etc. i bought my condo right when i got my nursing job and i love it, but i also have to make some sacrafices, can't just will nilly spend money anymore. chances are once you have a home you will want to spend more of your money on your home with improvements. just don't get caught in the home improvement trap, people buy a house, then run up those credit cards trying to improve everything all at once. do it slowly over time and make sure you have the cash to do it, do not put it on credit!!

if you can remember that then you should be able to adjust your lifestyle to fit your budget... for instance don't by the 32,000 dollar car just because you want it, buy the 18,000 car that will get you from point a to point b with much less of a car payment and more money in your savings account every month, and if and when you do buy a car remember to bargain at those dealerships, if they aren't willing to negotiate, walk away, they will call you with a better deal within a couple of days more than likely. don't listen to poeple who say its better to buy a used care, guess what, with this economy used cars are in demmand and people can often get a better deal on a new car with a lot less worry!! (oh and buy honda they are awsome :)

dont make emotially charged purchases! that will get you in real trouble. if you find your in love with an object that is expensive ie a car or house, take time to think about it and make sure you can really afford it, you won't regret it, but you will regret it if you make a spur of the moment large purchase that your finances really cannot handle...

when buying ahouse, don't by the maximum house you can afford and then expect to be able to go out and party and save money... you have to give somewhere. your first house will not be your dream house (unless you win the lottery), so when your home shopping remember your first house will also not be your last either, there will be plenty of time to move up the property ladder so to speak... so pick the reasonably priced house that you can live with over the over priced, barely in your budget house that you may have to work two jobs for! this includes moving to the 'burbs if your budget doesn't support city living!

remember you are in control of your life and you can chose the pathway. hopefully kids won't come until you have a hubby which means a second income. so until the time is right take birth control or use another reliable means to prevent pregnacy until the time is right...

hope this helps

happyparamedicrn

bonn_bai

48 Posts

Echoing the other posters, you can do anything you want with a solid budget! My dad has been laid off numerous times throughout his career and each time he and my mom get back on their feet by immediately adjusting the budget. There are lots of good resources out there like Dave Ramsey and "America's Cheapest Family" who can help you if needed. "America's Cheapest Family" paid off a house in like 9 years on 35k/year salary with 5 kids! In Scottsdale, AZ, no less - not a cheap city!

One thing I heard a few years ago from the owner of a large grocery chain stuck with me. He said that when he and his wife got married, they were dirt poor. They bought a cheapo 2 bedroom, 1 bath house and lived on a tight budget until they got that house paid off. Then they sold it and bought a 3 bedroom 2 bath house and had a very small mortgage because of the down payment. Each time they've moved up it's only been because they paid something else off and had the means to truly afford moving up. Now they are millionaires, but they started out making sacrifices so they could have control over their money, rather than their money having control over them.

crystalgirl

4 Posts

Hi mamamerlee, I sometimes find that the "american dream" is overrated, so many people I know think once I have a,b,c,and d I will be happy and be where I want/need to be, then you get there and keep seeking what it is that will make you happy. If I could do it all again I would have opted for the condo, we both work so much that there is no time for the house and big yard we thoght we needed,so no more new cars for us and hopefully downgrade into something smaller sooner than later. I've found that a house and car will not feed your heart and soul, and that the door that opens to happiness and contentment is on the inside of your heart:redbeathe

Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN

1 Article; 20,908 Posts

Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
Hey Mamamerlee,

Yes I do live in the city. It'll be quite a ways before I actually go and make a purchase. I've been working for less than a year and I'm currently paying off my student loans. I don't support anyone now and I'm living at home saving a ton of money.

This is the dilemma I have.. I want the car, the house.. you know.. the american dream so to speak. Just wondering if its possible and not live pay check to pay check. Just kind of depressing to think about. I know I can easily do these things if I was making 100k+. I'm pretty good with my money, I budget and don't spend on superfluous things all the time.

Thank you for replying though.

You have been working for less than a year and make $78,000. That is a good dollar! The car the house the american dream is not cheap! Hopefully you will have a husband to help you and it won't be paycheck to paycheck. It is location location location! as far as how expensive things are but to have a family it is not cheap and you need to live within your means. Even then.............if there is a devestating illness and you can't work can make have good head on your shoulders........go hug your parents!!!!!

IcanHealYou

174 Posts

Specializes in Medicine.
You have been working for less than a year and make $78,000. That is a good dollar! The car the house the american dream is not cheap! Hopefully you will have a husband to help you and it won't be paycheck to paycheck. It is location location location! as far as how expensive things are but to have a family it is not cheap and you need to live within your means. Even then.............if there is a devestating illness and you can't work can make have good head on your shoulders........go hug your parents!!!!!

Whoa whoa, imma dude lol. I'll be looking for a wife =P

SwampCat, BSN

310 Posts

Specializes in Psychiatry.

I agree with most of the previous posts. Just wanted to point out, though, that for many the "American Dream" is a NEW house, a NEW car, etc... which they then spend above their means and go under. You need to strike a balance. Do you want a new BMW, or will you be happy with one a few years old and thousands of $ cheaper? Your location may be an issue. You can get a gorgeous house (my pov) around here for less than $250k, commute 40 minutes to a large city hospital and have the best of both worlds.

I live in the poorest county in CT, I do not work (yet) and my husband grosses less than $50k/yr. We are 3 yrs away from paying off our mortgage (less than $1000/month) on our 3 bedroom home with 3 acres. We have one car payment that is less than $200/month. We have two kids. We don't pay for cable tv, elaborate vacations, keeping up with the Joneses, but we are certainly living *OUR* America Dream.

You can do it, too. Budget and decide what is really necessary.

sunnycalifRN

902 Posts

Hey Mamamerlee,

Yes I do live in the city. It'll be quite a ways before I actually go and make a purchase. I've been working for less than a year and I'm currently paying off my student loans. I don't support anyone now and I'm living at home saving a ton of money.

This is the dilemma I have.. I want the car, the house.. you know.. the american dream so to speak. Just wondering if its possible and not live pay check to pay check. Just kind of depressing to think about. I know I can easily do these things if I was making 100k+. I'm pretty good with my money, I budget and don't spend on superfluous things all the time.

Thank you for replying though.

A wise person, my father, told me that you have to live within your means. If you cannot control your spending, no amount of money will be enough. You say that $100K is enough but if you made that much, your choice of home and choice of car and choice of vacation may ratchet up a couple of notches, and you'll be in the same situation that you're currently in. As others have said already, budget your income wisely and you can live comfortably on an RN salary.

IcanHealYou

174 Posts

Specializes in Medicine.
A wise person, my father, told me that you have to live within your means. If you cannot control your spending, no amount of money will be enough. You say that $100K is enough but if you made that much, your choice of home and choice of car and choice of vacation may ratchet up a couple of notches, and you'll be in the same situation that you're currently in. As others have said already, budget your income wisely and you can live comfortably on an RN salary.

You're right my parents told me the same growing up.

lovescapeRN

39 Posts

my apartment is $2200 per month n california. HA! that's rental prices. i am single, without kids, young.

i plan to pick up per diem shifts on the side to make that money back. Plus per diems in california make sooo much its ridiculous!

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