This is a new one...

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Specializes in ED, School Nurse.

I just had a teacher call me.

Teacher: "My son has hand, foot, and mouth disease. I have to make sub plans, can I drop them at your office?"

Me: "Your sub plans?"

Teacher: Sounding frazzled. "No, my son. Can I drop my son off in your office so I can work on my sub plans?"

Me: Holy Hannah, do I look like I run a day care in my office??!!??! I'm sorry your son is sick and all, but really?!?!? "No- I can't have your toddler aged son running around my office spreading his germs all over."

Teacher: "Ok, well, then."

Me: "Bye!"

Then this just happened.

Student: "Can you look at this bug bite and tell me if something bad will happen?"

Me: ... "Your confidence in my assessment skills is outstanding, however, it's a bug bite. I'm not sure what you mean by 'something bad'".

Student: "Well, can't you tell me if I am going to get some disease or something?"

Me: "Until you develop the symptoms of said disease, I have no way of knowing if your bug bite will make you sick or not."

Student: "Ok, well thanks anyways."

It's gonna be a weird day, I can tell already.

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Specializes in school nurse.

Was the teacher's child even a student at your school??

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Should have told her you would take the kid, but a sick kid daycare cost is $50 per hour with an hour minimum!

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Specializes in School Nursing, Hospice,Med-Surg.

Ha!

I get the, "can I leave my diseased kid with you while I work on my sub plans?" thing ALL the time.

I also get the bizarre questions that clearly exhibit extreme confidence in my abilities. I wonder if I should be flattered. I also wonder if I should just answer these kids and leave them to continue believing that I have such outstanding abilities.

A 6th grader came a couple of weeks ago, stood in front of me and said, "I just wanted to stop by and ask you if I have a virus." He just wanted me to look at him & give a yes or no answer. Apparently his mom had traveled to Florida a few days earlier where "a virus had been going around." I seriously considered pulling out my otoscope, my sat monitor, stethoscope and anything else medical and official-looking, saying a few long, mysterious medical words and giving him an official "no, you are safe to return to math class."

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Specializes in ED, School Nurse.
Was the teacher's child even a student at your school??

No. I work at a high school. This child is maybe 2 years old? Maybe 2 1/2? She was on maternity leave my first year here and I've been here 3 years.

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Specializes in school nurse.
No. I work at a high school. This child is maybe 2 years old? Maybe 2 1/2? She was on maternity leave my first year here and I've been here 3 years.

Oh, wow. That takes a mega-dose of chutzpah...

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. "Your confidence in my assessment skills is outstanding, however, it's a bug bite

:roflmao:

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Specializes in ED, School Nurse.
Ha!

I get the, "can I leave my diseased kid with you while I work on my sub plans?" thing ALL the time.

I also get the bizarre questions that clearly exhibit extreme confidence in my abilities. I wonder if I should be flattered. I also wonder if I should just answer these kids and leave them to continue believing that I have such outstanding abilities.

This is the first time a teacher has ever asked me to do such a thing. I was kind of dumbfounded, to be honest!

I should keep a Magic 8 Ball here. Will I get a disease from this bug bite? **shake-a-shake-a-shake-a** M8B: "It is decidedly so." Me: "Well, good luck, it's been nice knowing ya!"

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A 2-3 year old that needs constant supervision? Seriously??? I mean I would have said no to any age but this is the worst! What happens when you are busy or get called to the other side of the building for an emergency??

The nerve of some people....

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Specializes in School Nursing, Hospice,Med-Surg.

I love the 8-ball idea. My hubby kept one at his upper management job for awhile. His favorite answer was "Ask Again Later."

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Specializes in School Nurse.

Unless the child has fever she should be able to send to daycare and not need to make sub plans...just sayin'

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Specializes in School nurse.

What's the problem? Everyone knows we have nothing to do every day except hand out ice packs, band aids, and saltines.

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