I think of all my training and schooling that I have attended, of all the skills that I've acquired, I am now realizing that I use my waitering skills more than anything else....
So from now on the ER is my restaurant...
Triage nurse is now the Maitre d'
The Er nurse will now be the patient's (customers now) waiter/waitress
The Doctor/PA is the Chef
RT is the wine stewart
the CNA is the water/bread person
Housekeeping is the bussing staff
Patient comes in and is seen by the triage nurse "Welcome to ......(fill in the blank)..... ER what can I do for you tonite?
PATIENT: " I had a 900Pm reservation for three, myself, and two visitors"
TRIAGE: No problem, Ma'am, just right this way, I have your usual table (stretcher) for you. Linda will be your nurse, she'll be with you momentarily..
PATIENT: Thank you, may I have a warm blanket, pillow, bigger chairs for my visiotrs along with new magazines,,,,these we read last time we were here.
TRIAGE: As you wish Ma'am.
PATIENT: Oh and another thing, I want to be seen by Dr. Henry, I see Dr Kevin is here, I don;t like the way he prepares his cephalgia special... not enough narco spice.
TRAIGE: As you wish..
VISITOR: Oh and a phone plez, I need to notify everyone I know that we are here.
TRIAGE: Right there on the wall
VISITOR: (UPSET).. hand it to me, dial an outside line and put your code in, it doesn't give me long distance unless you put your code in duhhh!
NURSE LINDA: Hi I am Linda I will be your RN (waitress) for the evening. What can I get you tonight?
PATIENT: I'll start off with 4 mg Morphine IV, followed by 25mg Phenergan for my nausea, then for the main course I will need Dilaudid 2mg..um.. make that 4mg IV. I'm feeling extra hungry, so please give me 10mg Valium IV. Then for dessert I will take a Percocet,Take Home pack.
NURSE LINDA: No problem, have it your way.
VISITOR: Can you get me a cup of water. Make sure you get it from the bubbler and not the spicket. And ice too.
VISITOR (on phone): And I'll have a lunch bag and a juice.
NURSE LINDA: Coming right up.
PATIENT: And get Sue to put my IV she is the best......
only if it gets there within29 minutes!:chuckle :chuckle
If that is the case, then we will ALWAYS have free beer and pizza.
When is the last time you can remember having a staff meeting that lasted less than 29 minutes??????
I think we have better attendance at our "morning after a hard nightshift" at the local diner having a beer and an omellette than any meeting I ever went too!!!!!!!!!!!
I think we have better attendance at our "morning after a hard nightshift" at the local diner having a beer and an omellette than any meeting I ever went too!!!!!!!!!!!
If that is the case, then we will ALWAYS have free beer and pizza.
When is the last time you can remember having a staff meeting that lasted less than 29 minutes??????
I think we have better attendance at our "morning after a hard nightshift" at the local diner having a beer and an omellette than any meeting I ever went too!!!!!!!!!!!
The other night I had a lady complain that there were too many carbs in her 2gmNa Low Chol dinner. And some woman interrupted me while I was trying to get report on a critical pt to let me know that " The lady in bed 6 would like some sherbert" I told her , " Well thats not really a priority right now," The woman stormed off and said " Well you don't have to be so RUDE. Why is it that once people come to the ER they are suddenly STARVING? Its like they don't have food at home. And I like when the doctor orders, " D/C after dinner." Let them ear at home. We need the bed! :(
Why is it that once people come to the ER they are suddenly STARVING?
Its so true! If I had a dollar for every person that said "What kind of place is this, where I cant get a cup of tea, or a hot meal!". "Excuse me maam, its 3 am, the kitchen is closed". And its not even the patients who complain about it, its the family members! I think we need to have a meeting...dietary should be open 24/7, how dare we keep the family members hungry, after all they have been there a whole 3 hours with nothing to eat!
Its so true! If I had a dollar for every person that said "What kind of place is this, where I cant get a cup of tea, or a hot meal!". "Excuse me maam, its 3 am, the kitchen is closed". And its not even the patients who complain about it, its the family members! I think we need to have a meeting...dietary should be open 24/7, how dare we keep the family members hungry, after all they have been there a whole 3 hours with nothing to eat!
Not to worry! I just guide the starving patients to our lovely assortment of crackers.....we have regular saltines, low sodium saltines, graham crackers, and for the high society clients who are accustomed to fine dining...we have club crackers. Sorry, water is an extra charge.
It would make my week if the next time that i float to the ER and if someone would ask for "bottled water", that i get a bottle of sterile water, hand it to them and say "it don't get much cleaner than that!":D
AMEN SISTER!
:(
bigfishsmallpond
40 Posts
we have a meeting next week to roll out the new "29 minutes' rule!Our new CEO is a friend of the guy who owns Little Ceasars
pizza , and he feels if they can deliver your pizza in 30 minj, we can deliver your baby in 29! Its' all a p-ssing contest!