I am in my first semester of nursing school. I absolutely love it, and I'm learning so much, so fast, but I've already had moments where I think, "How am I going to finish 5 semesters of this?" There is so much stress that sometimes, I can't see the light at the end of the tunnel. At orientation, we had a speaker who was a recent graduate of our school, and boy, was she right about taking it one day at a time. I start freaking out when I think about the long road ahead before graduation and the NCLEX. People often ask me how I manage full time nursing school with two kids. My response is, "It isn't an option. I just do it." I'm not trying to be rude, but really, that is my honest answer.
I have a husband and two very young kids, 19 months, and 4 months. I was just curious as to how you get through your daily routine with kids, how you're handling the stress. I feel stretched to the max. I forget to eat, I hardly sleep, and now I'm developing bronchitis. I'm so thankful my husband helps me. But I often feel very guilty that my 19-month-old daughter cries when I leave her at the sitter's or when my husband pulls her out of our room because "Mommy is studying." I am trying to learn to put down my books and take breaks. I am known to lock myself in a room for hours and read. Sure, I am building a foundation for my career, which will benefit my family. But I try not to think about the time I can't spend with them anymore because I will start crying. I went from stay-at-home mom to hardly ever being around. THAT is the hardest part of nursing school to me. What about you guys?
When I begin school in August, I will have a 2 month old (my first). I am fortunate to have an incredibly supportive and wonderful husband. A lot of these responses give me great hope. If yall can do it, maybe I can do it too!
But I'm still worried - how do you keep the marriage alive and well? I'd rather we stay strong as a couple than just barely get by. Any advice on how to manage not only studies and kids, but also keeping a healthy marriage? I love my husband dearly and it worries me a lot that all the stressors will come between us.
Also, my mom says I should consider deferring for a year. Anyone have any thoughts on that? Is it easier to go through school if the kid is 2 months? or 14 months? Or maybe it doesn't really matter either way?
i have 2 kids. 2 and 5 and it isnt the easiest but it isnt impossible..expecially because i want to be a nurse soo bad. i do not work and i go to nursing school mostly at night. i spend all the day time hours with my kids. while i am putting them to bed i drink a cup of coffee. then i stay up until like 1am studying and getting all my paperwork done. i am a little tired in the morning but it is not that bad. the good this is that my kids dont miss out on any mommy time becuase they are sleeping when i am doing my school work. and i know that i will have quiet time to study without anyone asking for juice.. screaming that they have a booboo.. needing their sock fixed..wanting to go outside.. or having to pick someone up from school.. so i am not stressed about trying to fit 2 chapters in or cramming for a test.. becuase i know that every night i am going to be able to have quiet study!
As far as the marriage goes, I think if it is strong, it will stay strong. just because I can't give my husband a ton of attention, doesn't mean it's going to go down the drain. People who blame their divorce on NS are just hiding the real truth, their marriage wasn't strong to begin with obviously. As for the kids thing, I have 5 ages 7 down to 18 months, so I feel the struggles you're all facing. all I know is my 7 year old thinks I'm totally cool for learning "all this stuff about the body" and no way I can let her down by failing.
To RockRay, do it now!! They require a ton more attention when they're older, get started now!
When I begin school in August, I will have a 2 month old (my first). I am fortunate to have an incredibly supportive and wonderful husband. A lot of these responses give me great hope. If yall can do it, maybe I can do it too!
But I'm still worried - how do you keep the marriage alive and well? I'd rather we stay strong as a couple than just barely get by. Any advice on how to manage not only studies and kids, but also keeping a healthy marriage? I love my husband dearly and it worries me a lot that all the stressors will come between us.
Also, my mom says I should consider deferring for a year. Anyone have any thoughts on that? Is it easier to go through school if the kid is 2 months? or 14 months? Or maybe it doesn't really matter either way?
Thanks!
Do it now! I did the majority of my pre-reqs while pregnant and with a infant. Oh plus a 4 yr old , a 6 yr old, and an 18 yr old. I did almost everything except my sciences online, which minimized the need for daycare. I'll be starting Accelerated BSN program in a few weeks and the youngest is almost 2 now. My husband works full-time shift work so scheduling is huge for us. We have a plan, a goal and and children to be raised- that keeps us strong and on track. :)
To those condsidering defering, unless you can't make arangements for your kids and NEED to defer until you can, or circumstance really will not allow you to go to school, DON'T defer. It is like putting anything off, the longer you wait to do it, the harder it will be. Will be really easy to defer a year, get to that year, and realize things will be no easier, and so defer another year, and never follow through, or have something come up that you can't.
And infant/young toddler would be easier to get into a routine of you having to leave for school, or to study then an older toddler that has gotten accustomed to having mommy/daddys attention all the time. One year is not going to make it any easier UNLESS that one year is the difference between daycare/baby sitter and them going into school, and so will help with costs. No matter if they are infants/young toddlers/older toddlers/preschool......all will take a lot of your time and you will need support to go to school...someone to watch them while you go to class, and some help so you can study. One age will not be easier then any other. Infant can't do anything on their own, so need you 100%, but sleep more and dont get into things. Toddlers dont sleep as much, are active and need 100% supervision or they will get into things or get hurt....but they can entertain themselfs a bit more. Each has its trade offs.
Getting into a routine of you being in school younger is easier. Will be easier for you, your husband and child to adopt that routine young, instead of adopt routine of you being home all day and with them 100% of the time and then you, your child and your husband all having to change routine when you do go back. And the sooner you do go to school, the sooner you can be working as a nurse, and the sooner your family can benifit from the effort and time you put in.
As for feeling guilty, kids this young will not remember that you were not there 100% of the time. Give them your all when you can and that WILL be enough. Your kids will be the ones that benifit down the road from you going back. It is not just for you, it is not a selfish endevor. They are the ones that will be able to do more because family income being increased by you inproving your carreer. More activities they can be involved in when they are older, nicer vactions your family can afford to go on when they are older, being able to more easily afford THEIR college education. I know those are the things I am looking forward to when I am working as a nurse.
I will say this though, my son is a little older, but I am a single mom and have been through the young years, having to put him in day care to work and such. Being a single mom and needing my income, going back to school was not feasable for me when he was younger. Now, with him being a little older (just turned nine.....went back to school just before he turned 8) and me getting laid off and getting unemployment for a while, as well as having savings put asside, things have finally worked out that I can go back with a little support that my family can provide, such as getting him off to school in the morning for me (i start before him, but get home before him). Older maybe a little easier to handle as far as them being more independent.....but they also have activities. Almost every night when he gets home it is help him with homework, I make dinner, and then we are out the door by 5-530 to be somewhere for something, and home sometime between 7-8 then if I am going to spend any time with him it is between then and when he gets ready for bed. I know some nights I will have to study more, and so won't be able to spend good quality time with him when we get home from his activities. Just saying, it doess't get any easier, and wont feel any less guilty taking your time away from them, just different things to work around.
When I begin school in August, I will have a 2 month old (my first). I am fortunate to have an incredibly supportive and wonderful husband. A lot of these responses give me great hope. If yall can do it, maybe I can do it too!
But I'm still worried - how do you keep the marriage alive and well? I'd rather we stay strong as a couple than just barely get by. Any advice on how to manage not only studies and kids, but also keeping a healthy marriage? I love my husband dearly and it worries me a lot that all the stressors will come between us.
Also, my mom says I should consider deferring for a year. Anyone have any thoughts on that? Is it easier to go through school if the kid is 2 months? or 14 months? Or maybe it doesn't really matter either way?
Thanks!
I am on my first semester of nursing school and let me tell you that it is definately not easy but 100% doable...I have 3 beautiful little girls ages 7, 2, and a 3 month old. These 4 weeks have been really tough on me and my family because we are still trying to get used to this new routine. There has been a couple of times where my husband complains about me not warning him how this was going to change our lives especially because I do not have time for him or my daughters. I also work 30hrs a week and that makes it even harder because i hardly have time to take care of my girls and don't have enough time to bond with my 3 month old (something that my husband does not agree with). Is not that I don't want to be with my kids or let alone take care of them is just that I don't have the time to dedicate as much as I would like and I can't help but feel very GUILTY:crying2:. I think to some extent this could take a toll in your relationship but at the same time I am trying my best to make my husband understand that this is not a permanent thing and that I need his support. He does help me taking care of my girls but he complains while doing it not only do I need physical support but verbal as well I understand him because it is very hard it has been for everyone He tellme me that I should had put this off a little longer after the kids were a little bigger but If i would had waited any longer I probably would never finish! If things keep on getting worse as far as my relationship and managing my time I will probably have to quit my job. That would definately give me more time. If anyone has any tips on how to manage work, school and still have time for your family please share I would really appreciate it... I had my fundamentals test today I hope I did good and all that studying pays off;)
I'm so thankful my husband helps me. But I often feel very guilty that my 19-month-old daughter cries when I leave her at the sitter's or when my husband pulls her out of our room because "Mommy is studying." I am trying to learn to put down my books and take breaks. I am known to lock myself in a room for hours and read. Sure, I am building a foundation for my career, which will benefit my family. But I try not to think about the time I can't spend with them anymore because I will start crying. I went from stay-at-home mom to hardly ever being around. THAT is the hardest part of nursing school to me. What about you guys?
RockRay
5 Posts
When I begin school in August, I will have a 2 month old (my first). I am fortunate to have an incredibly supportive and wonderful husband. A lot of these responses give me great hope. If yall can do it, maybe I can do it too!
But I'm still worried - how do you keep the marriage alive and well? I'd rather we stay strong as a couple than just barely get by. Any advice on how to manage not only studies and kids, but also keeping a healthy marriage? I love my husband dearly and it worries me a lot that all the stressors will come between us.
Also, my mom says I should consider deferring for a year. Anyone have any thoughts on that? Is it easier to go through school if the kid is 2 months? or 14 months? Or maybe it doesn't really matter either way?
Thanks!