Published Sep 25, 2009
Hopeful3
61 Posts
i wanted to tell you something that was said to me in my human anatomy class. there was a girl there that had gone to another college and gotten one year or two years into her studies. she is now taking classes at my college so she can "find herself" and not "waste" money. she asked what i was going into, and i expanded on my nursing decision and said i would maybe like to work with ill children. i guess for clincals one semester she was at a children's sick ward and she said to me (this is her words almost verbatim) " i don't know why anyone would want to work with dying children, it is so depressing, what is the point?? they are just going to die anyway!"
i could believe it! yikes, this girl should not be in the health field period. it has just been bothering me her negative attitude. i just had to tell you that story to get it off my chest. when people say things like this i just feel terrible they are going to be a nurse or in the health field.
thank you for reading,
robin
CDeniseGo
50 Posts
Luckily for all of us, she said that she was trying to "find herself", and with her statements I don't believe that we will be seeing her near the bedside anytime soon in a healthcare role! Don't let those who don't share your views discourage or phase you one bit. I do not want to deal with children in the healthcare setting for other reasons, but will not let that stop me from doing the best I can in ob, peds, or anywhere else I may end up. Often we don't get to pick our patients, so all we can do is our best, swallow our thoughts (fears, etc) and do the best job we can.
>>so all we can do is our best, swallow our thoughts (fears, etc) and do the best job we can.
Yep! That is where I am at right now!
I am swallowing so many fears and doubts. Reading this board helps. I am early in my journey, I hope I can do it! I really worry about the Math but I am going to give it my all!
fiveofpeep
1,237 Posts
nursing math isnt too tough.. Its just arithmetic with simple division and multiplication. it just takes practice.
almost everyone in my program really loves nursing and do not regret their decision...and we graduate this december... nursing school on the other hand, I think we all pretty much hate. just dont get discouraged.
caliotter3
38,333 Posts
Sometimes people just don't state their opinions in a very understanding, nonjudgemental, or intelligent way. If that other student does not want to work with sick or dying children she has the option to stay away from that area of nursing. Don't dwell on her statement, just move forward with your own motivations and opinions. And good luck in nursing school. I expect that we will see you as a nurse long before the other individual.
cingle
86 Posts
People don't always express themselves well. I'd like to think this fellow student of yours is covering up her own feelings of hopelessness in helping terminally ill children and their families. Knowing myself, I couldn't do it. Some will not be able to get past the sadness to find out that what they do on a daily basis actually does help the patient and his/her family. Those people (like me!) may be great at working with other populations.
~Mi Vida Loca~RN, ASN, RN
5,259 Posts
I wouldn't be so quick to begrudge someone that might not always have the most tactful way of saying something. I don't think this woman shouldn't be a nurse at all. Dying children aren't something she can handle, I don't think I could handle it either. Not on a constant basis anyway. I LOVE babies and want to work in ER or L&D or maybe both. A lot of people have asked me why not NICU. I would love to work in NICU but I know mentally I would not be able to handle it. I understand in L&D now and again their might be a still birth or a baby doesn't make it. But the chances of a baby not making it in NICU will be a lot more often. I don't think that I don't deserve to be a nurse because I know what I can and can't mentally handle.
I also will never apply for a burn unit. It is not something I can emotionally handle.
She might not have been said things in the most tactful way, this doesn't make her a bad person.
I don't think that I could work in the fast pace of an ER but that doesn't mean I shouldn't be a nurse. And chances are probably good that if I were to give it a try, I could probably adapt. I just don't seek out that area of nursing for a job. To each, his own.
jrw03282009
139 Posts
I would never be able to work with children. I love them too much and I know in my heart I would get too close. I would not be able to maintain the mental distance as I would an adult. So in saying that, I can understand why someone wouldnt be able to do pediactrics BUT for someone to be so heartless as saying they are going to die anyway??? It would have been really hard to me not to pelt her a good one.
I said this girl has a negative attitude and anyone you says negative things like "They are just going to die anyways!" in my opinion shouldn't be in the health field. That is MY opinion, I understand some of you have different ones. I would not want someone who had that value system caring for myself, my ailing parent, or dying child. But that is MY opinion.
Thanks!
BabyLady, BSN, RN
2,300 Posts
When someone says something like that to you, say, "It's a shame that you don't have any hope for these children. In fact, a good number of them do not only survive but thrive and go on to lead perfectly normal lives. I understand that Pediatrics isn't for everyone and I am glad that you are leaving those jobs open for positive people like me!"
AllSmiles225
213 Posts
In specialty areas like those where you are dealing with terminally ill children the nurse must have tact. She must be able to realize "YES this child is going to die, but what can I do to make his/her time here better?" This girl sounds like she may not have been able to get past the stage of ACCEPTING that a child was going to die and therefore could not fulfill the rest of her duties as a nurse. Does that means she will be bad in Med-Surg or Tele? Absolutely not. She may just know that she could not handle with what she is perceiving to be an area of nursing where children are constantly dying. I'm glad that she knows she would not provide them the proper nursing care because that shows that she knows her limits. If anyone threw me to work on a psych unit I would resign and if it was the last nursing job on earth I wouldn't take it. You will come to see as you go through your nursing clinicals that there is one thing that you could NEVER EVER do and regardless of how you present it..it all comes down to the fact that YOU KNOW that YOU couldn't handle it no matter how good of a nurse you are. She will find something that she loves and will never have to deal with those "dying children" and so will you. Good luck with your schooling.