Nurses General Nursing
Published Jul 7, 2007
Beary-nice
514 Posts
Well, I was shift #7 into my orientation as a new grad RN yesterday and I decided to take my turn to vent.
Now this certainly was not the first time I had my butt ripped off and handed back to me by a doctor, but if I could have crawled in a hole and died...that would have been okay too. :uhoh21:
I feel like I really blew the moment, and I know better. I was confronted (loudly) in the middle of the hall in front of staff, visitors, God and worst of all, my coach.
Said doctor was upset that "why didn't I notify anyone how sick the patient was???!!!!" Um...I did, and that person was the pt's surgeon at 6:30am sharp when I am not on the floor technically till 6:45.
I stood there frozen when all I wanted to say was "Do I get a turn to say something here...then I would have said that someone was notified and yes I do realize how sick this patient is. My coach chimed in and set things straight...and said doctor calmed down.
My gosh! I have even in my career had a doctor tell me that I was a piece of crap LPN that didn't deserve to breathe air let alone care for his patients...his way of saying that he didn't care for LPNs...nice huh? But yesterday, I feel as if I failed. I would have rather started peeing my pants or have broken wind in front of my coach than to have what happened yesterday happen.
So here I spend today thinking about what I am gonna say next time
and believe me, it will come up again with same doctor about some other patient some other time. :trout:
I am rambling...but I had to get it out. Thanks for listening!
llg, PhD, RN
13,469 Posts
OK ... I can understand why you are upset ... but take a deep breath and look at this objectively.
While this incident was a major event in this early stage of your career, it probably wasn't that big of a deal to your coach. She probably has dealt with this doctor many times and knows that he can be intimidating. She has also probably seen lots of new grads stumble in their attempts to handle similar situations. That's why she was able to step in so quickly and manage it.
I repeat .... For you, it was a big deal. For her, it probably was not a big deal. Once you have drilled that firmly into your head, it's time to move on. What will you say next time you see your coach? Here's what I suggest:
Say, "Thank you for helping me on Friday with Dr. ____. It really threw me off balance. I really need to work on my ability to handle such situations. Can you give me a few tips on how you do it? I'd really appreciate any advice you can give me so that I can do better in the future."
Treat the incident as a learning opportunity ... learn from it ... and then you won't have to worry about it anymore. Thanking your coach and asking her to help you learn helps to change the way you think about it and about your relationship with her. Instead of thinking of her as judging you (harshly), you can think of her as a true coach who is there to help you succeed.
Good luck!
Thank you llg for your response. I really appreciate it and I do need to treat it as a learning opportunity instead of a huge blow to my confidence.
I should have said that my coach is a "he". I don't know if that is what made things more difficult and embarassing??? I love my coach to pieces and he has been really good to me and shows me how it is in the real world of RN-dom.
Said doctor in infamously a piece of work and I have seen him rip many a butt, I just wasn't prepared for it to be mine yesterday.
DutchgirlRN, ASN, RN
3,932 Posts
This MD was totally unprofessional yelling at you in the hallway. I know it's easier for me to say what you should have done because at the time you're being yelled at it's hard to say anything. Been there, done that. If it happens again...tell him you'll be glad to discuss it with him quietly in another location. I've had to do that once and it worked like a charm. The first time I got majorly yelled at in the hallway...I just stood there. But, I did report him for unprofessional conduct to administration and he was told he should apoligize to me, of course he didn't but he sure got the message.
Keep your chin up! Congratulations on getting your RN. I was an LPN for 23 years and now an RN for 7+ years. Professionally it was the best thing I could have done for myself.
SilentfadesRPA
240 Posts
Dear Beary
I first and foremost want to respond to you by saying I am so very sorry that this physician took such an manner in addressing you.
I am also sorry that you were paralyzed with such fear not to respond however at times it is near impossible to find the words or response to such a situation when you are being yelled embarassed and accused.
No fellow nurse it is NOT Score- MD=1 Beary=0 Please do NOT think like that not at all. Folks like that are simply a pompus a$$ and showing a knee jerk response.
That is all I can say right now except cut yourself some slack in the review of this you were sabotoged and sounds as if you did not do anything wrong.
But again go easy with you. I am very sorry this happend to you.
Marc
:welcome:
Thank-you Dutchgirl! Yep, it crossed my mind to tell him that we could take care of this elsewhere.
I am glad to know that there is someone else out there who is a longtimer LPN now RN. I have no regrets about going back to school in fact I wish I could have done it sooner. But, that's life.
Thanks again!
Thanks to you too silentfades (Marc), I know I get rather hard on myself and I think I then proceed to spiral down and lose confidence.
I keep reviewing in my head if I could have done anything else with the patient, but my main objective was to let someone know what was going on because I knew from report, my assessment, and my instinct that she was very sick. I think I did what I needed to do. I just got totally caught off guard.
CseMgr1, ASN, RN
1,287 Posts
If the shoe had been on the other foot, you would have been shown the door for yelling at him.
It never ceases to amaze me how some physicians, who are also considered professionals, think that their medical license gives them the right to talk to us as if we crawled out from underneath a rock.
He is who he is. Just consider the source and continue to be the professional that you are...which is more than can be said for him.
If the shoe had been on the other foot, you would have been shown the door for yelling at him.It never ceases to amaze me how some physicians, who are also considered professionals, think that their medical license gives them the right to talk to us as if we crawled out from underneath a rock.He is who he is. Just consider the source and continue to be the professional that you are...which is more than can be said for him.
Thanks Case! When I think about what happened, I was teetering on the line of really ruffling my feathers and saying something I shouldn't have at all. I felt blindsided and almost naive though I shouldn't have been because I have seen this docs behavior on more than one occasion and he has been reported many times in the past by others yet continues to throw his weight around...heaven forbid he would apologize. I appreciate your and everyone's input.
TazziRN, RN
6,487 Posts
Beary, if the doc was put in his place (no matter by whom) then the score is not in his favor!
With experience and increasing self-confidence, you will start letting docs know they are wrong. I would have been surprised if a new grad was able to stand his/her ground when confronted like that. Being a new grad is stressful enough; throw a doc with a temper tantrum in the mix and your brain cells freeze......you can't think of anything to say until later.
Thanks Tazzi, I would agree that the score probably really wasn't in his favor. I will say that I put alot of pressure on myself sometimes because even though I am a new grad, I am not "new" if you know what I mean. I feel sometimes like all the more is expected of me. They told me I could plan on my orientation being less than six weeks due to my PBDS coming back from the reviewer spotless. I feel like alot is expected of me by everyone including myself. I feel like I should have alot of the answers by now after all of these years and yesterday I couldn't even let a squeak out. It disappoints me and frightens me. I cannot let things come to this. I appreciate again everyone's input.
I know you aren't brand new, but any major change is stressful no matter what the background.