Second guessing myself

  1. Yesterday morning, I had to leave and come back before the bell rang for classes to start. On my way back, I noticed a student walking away from the campus. I recognized the little darling and asked her where she was going She told me she was going home because she did not feel well. She explained what was going on (stomach issues, nothing that would keep her out of school.) I told her she needed to come with me and go back to school. She let me know that she would prefer not to return to campus. I told her if she did not come back with me I would call mom. Well, she got in the car and checked into school since the bell had already rung. She told me not to tell anyone. So, since she came back, I did not call mom. I did notify her counselor, though. She stayed all day and I thought that was that.

    Her counselor came into my office and asked if I had seen her today. She though that since I seen her yesterday, that maybe I had seen her today on my way to work. I explain that I had left and come back when I saw her. The counselor informed me the student is not her today and LD friends were concerned about her. Counselor has attempted to call mom and had to leave a message. She was going to call another contact soon.

    Little Darling is a 9th grader that should be an 11th grader. She is struggling in all her core classes and not applying herself at all. Part of her issues stem from being moved not only all over our area, but the country and the issue with credits that comes with that. She did express yesterday that she wanted to drop out of school and we talked about her options.

    I have had a relationship with LD earlier in her life, so to me it was a little different than just giving any student a ride back to school. I usually notify admin if this type of thing has happened in the past and let them deal with it.

    Now I am wondering if I should have called mom.
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    About cooties_are_real

    Joined: Apr '12; Posts: 322; Likes: 884
    from TX , US
    Specialty: 10 year(s) of experience in School


  3. by   MrNurse(x2)
    Hindsight is always 20/20. You made the best decision for the circumstances at the time. Your critical thinking is global, not just in nursing situations. Trust your gut and realize that there was no way to tell she was not going to show today.
  4. by   Farawyn
    I would have called.
    I'm sorry! I'm not criticizing you.
    We just have so many issues like this at my school, I've learned to at least leave a message.
  5. by   cooties_are_real
    Quote from Farawyn
    I would have called.
    I'm sorry! I'm not criticizing you.
    We just have so many issues like this at my school, I've learned to at least leave a message.
    I will next time for sure.

    The counselor did contact Grandfather. He said mom was at work and he did not know the LD did not come to school today.
  6. by   bsyrn
    We are not allowed to transport students in our own vehicles so I would not have put her in the car and I definitely would have called Mom. I totally understand why you didn't though...
  7. by   cooties_are_real
    Update: Student returned this morning. She was sent to my office for "anxiety". After talking with her for a short time, I walked with her to the counselor's office. Long story short, she is having issues all around and needs professional help. I left her with the counselor since she was going to have to call mom.

    These are the ones that hurt my heart. Their life has not been good from day one. Parent really sucks, because she was not parented well. Family history is the druggie, prison, reject my natural children type. I'm sure you all have these type of students. To them the deck seems to be stacked against them and they have been beaten down so much they have no hope. They will likely continue this cycle unless they get the drive to change.

    All I can do now is pray for this Little Darling.
  8. by   scuba nurse
    I would have done the same thing as you did, especially if I had a prior outside of school relationship with her (otherwise I would not have given her a ride). But I think what you did was fine, she trusts you obviously, and needs you on her side, as a trusted adult. So not calling her mom was a good choice. I am glad the counselor is helping as well, and wish the best for her and her family. It is so hard, especially when you "know" them.
  9. by   DEgalRN
    I'm not sure I would have done the same thing, but, I understand why you did, especially with the back story. I'm not allowed to leave campus, so I wouldn't have to worry about transporting a student at least! I had a student who admitted to leaving campus and coming back though, and I did let administrators know even know I really didn't want to knowing her and her story, too. Anything that has the potential for harm to a student goes through administrators either for advisement or decision making. Working in a small school, I think that's easier, but honestly, I also feel safer doing that too.