Relationships and Nursing school

Princess74 · May 20, 2006

The only advice that I can give you is this. If you want to break up with your boyfriend, then go ahead, but don't use nursing school as an excuse. It is true that some relationships do not make it thru nursing school but if you and your SO really want to be together then you will find a way for it to work. I'm starting nursing school this fall too. My boyfriend and I love each other very much, we know that there will be less time for us to spend together but we also know that no matter what we will make sure that things continue to work out for us. I would never break up with someone that I was truly in-love with just because school is going to be hard. We want to get married in a couple of years and can use all the money that we can get. Knowing that we will be able to afford to get married once I am a nurse is a reason for me to study even harder, he helps me study too. He and I are in this together!

I guess the first thing you need is the right attitude. Expect to make things work. If you think that nursing school will break you up then it certainly will.

burn out · May 20, 2006

I hear the divorce rate for nurses is very high but I don't now the statistics on it. Nursing careers are very hard on families and spouses-working every other weekend, christmas and holidays etc- not to mention the endless night shifts. If you really care about this person let them get adjusted now

It only gets harder later. If he is a distraction now you may need to make a decision as to which is more important to you.

tookewlandy · May 20, 2006

If you love someone you make it work, He should be prepared just as you for this rollercoaster, You should not break up with him, you just may need him to lean on through all this

neeniebean · May 20, 2006

The only advice that I can give you is this. If you want to break up with your boyfriend, then go ahead, but don't use nursing school as an excuse. It is true that some relationships do not make it thru nursing school but if you and your SO really want to be together then you will find a way for it to work. I'm starting nursing school this fall too. My boyfriend and I love each other very much, we know that there will be less time for us to spend together but we also know that no matter what we will make sure that things continue to work out for us. I would never break up with someone that I was truly in-love with just because school is going to be hard. We want to get married in a couple of years and can use all the money that we can get. Knowing that we will be able to afford to get married once I am a nurse is a reason for me to study even harder, he helps me study too. He and I are in this together!
I guess the first thing you need is the right attitude. Expect to make things work. If you think that nursing school will break you up then it certainly will.

I completely agree. When i got married, it wasn't under the stipulation that it was just for good times. you take the good with the bad. However, dating is alot different than marriage, and if you're already debating on breaking up with your SO before you even know what you're in for, then maybe your relationship with him just isn't a priority- or something that you feel is worth fighting for. And, that's fine. but like the previous poster said- i wouldn't blame that on nursing school. There are tons of people on here that are raising families while going to nursing school- and i don't see them auctioning off their kids because they don't have the time for them. If you want to make something work, you'll try your hardest to make it work, and if you don't, then you won't.

Nony · May 20, 2006

I completely agree. When i got married, it wasn't under the stipulation that it was just for good times. you take the good with the bad. However, dating is alot different than marriage, and if you're already debating on breaking up with your SO before you even know what you're in for, then maybe your relationship with him just isn't a priority- or something that you feel is worth fighting for. And, that's fine. but like the previous poster said- i wouldn't blame that on nursing school. There are tons of people on here that are raising families while going to nursing school- and i don't see them auctioning off their kids because they don't have the time for them. If you want to make something work, you'll try your hardest to make it work, and if you don't, then you won't.

You might be right.

emilyd126 · May 21, 2006

I don't think you should break up with your boyfriend because of school unless there is another reason you really want to break up with him. I am a 2nd year nursing student in an accelerated program with a son who is less than a year and a husband. Although I am often busy with studying, its not that bad that it would cause any problems with my relationships. Its hard not to listen to people telling you your life will end b/c of school (thats what everyone told me), but its not as bad as everyone makes it out to be. Please start the program and make that decision for yourself before breaking it off and before you know how hard it is going to be for YOU.

Gompers, BSN, RN · May 21, 2006

What worked for me was to get all my studying and papers done during the week, and then having the entire weekend off to spend with my boyfriend. We'd talk every evening on the phone just to touch base and say hello, but that was it during the week. I'd finish class on Friday and then have until Sunday evening to spend with him, my family, and my other friends. I'd do my homework and studying Sun-Thurs evenings.

Having two whole days off a week to relax kept me from burning out, both in school and in my relationship.

kristen3g3tp8 · May 21, 2006

You'll be able to handle it!! I work 25 hours a week, live with my boyfriend... and I manage. A lot of people say Nursing school is tough, but if you managed to get through the core classes while still sustaining a life, you'll be able to get through nursing school! It's a lot of work, and you cannot just get by... you NEED to learn the material and be able to preform the skills... lives are on the line if you don't! Make school a top priority, but it wont take up all of your time. One tip... start preping for the NCLEX early! A lot of the questions you'll have on your exams are set up in a simular fashion to the NCLEX questions... so by working your way through those you'll be studying for your classes at the same time. Before I even started nursing school I bought the NCLEX prep book and got myself familiar with the material, I googled things I didn't know and read the rationale for the questions I got wrong. It was amazing how many things I knew before even starting school! Nevertheless.... don't give up on your life outside of school! You'll need someone to talk to after facing many of the things you'll see in the hospital. A good understanding boyfriend might even be what you need to get through nursing school. :) Good luck hun!!

nursecher · May 21, 2006

I have 2 children ages 4 and 1 and a hubby and do not plan on breaking up with any of them for nursing school. It is possible to go to school and have a personal life. It is all about time management and balance. Going to school has brought my husband and I closer together.

GooeyRN, ADN, BSN, CNA, LPN, RN · May 21, 2006

No need to break up/divorce over school alone. If there are other issues where you are considering a break up, then it may be easier to break up and get it done and over with so there isn't any drama during school. But a break is not necessary if you love him.

My relationship survived a General studies degree, a Practical nursing program, the ADN program, and my DH (then boyfriend) taking a job in another state and moving away. I went to school all week and studied all week. I always took half an hour to talk to him every evening no matter how tired I was and no matter how much studying I had to do. I worked part time on weekends when DH came to visit, and I studied while he was in. He was very understanding. But we did go to dinner book free, and for a hike book free on sat and sun, regardless if I had a test or not. We popped in a movie that he was interested in (one that I had no desire to watch so I wasn't tempted) and I would study during it.

We got engaged shortly after my graduation. We planned a wedding while I worked tons of overtime,(I was a nightshifter) seeing each other when we could on the weekends.

Relationships can last during school and working as a nurse. It just takes a whole lot of patience and trust.

lee22 · May 21, 2006

When I went to nursing school I paid a firend to have relations with my husband on a weekly basis-it gave me time to study. It brought out the compassionate side of me and made me a better nurse. After, we moved far away