"Observing" my peers

Night__Owl, BSN, RN · Dec 18, 2018

Sounds like you handled it pretty well on your feet. I wouldn't want to throw any of my coworkers under the bus short of something truly dangerous. After all, if you get into a mess on the floor, it probably won't be your manager there to help you out. It'll be those coworkers you were asked to rat on.

Is there (in your opinion,) truly anything to either persons claim? Is either nurse really not pulling their weight? Or is it just a case of conflicting personalities?

I might would have left off the comment about being asked to spy, depending on my level of comfort with the manager, because s/he possibly could have found that as you taking a dig on her leadership for asking you. Other than that, I think a careful non-answer like you gave is probably the most appropriate.

Sour Lemon · Dec 18, 2018

My supervisor asked me in private about my observations of the dynamics between two of my peers. Each one feels they are given unfairly difficult assignments and the other is not pulling their weight. My opinion was sought because I work with them the most often, though not in a leadership role. I gave a noncommittal response that I frequently see each of them busy at work but I felt like I was being asked to spy on them. Any suggestions on how to proceed if I am asked again? Thank you!

I would say flattering things about both of them if I could do it honestly ..and nothing about either one of them if I couldn't. That would go something like, "I stay so busy with my own assignment that I really don't notice what other people are doing."

The manager needs to pull them in together for a talk, not drag you into it.

allnurses Guide · Dec 18, 2018

On the other hand, the manager is asking the person on the scene for her perspective. Having a 3rd party point of view can really help, if you aren't there personally to witness what is going on then asking for an outside witness can help. Sometimes it is very clear one is in the wrong, and sometimes not. Team work is a big thing here, and having a team member not pulling their weight can affect everyone.

It is less spying than asking if you also have a problem with assignments or these coworkers. I'd be diplomatic in my answer, if you truly can't say then that is your answer.

advsmuch08 · Dec 19, 2018

This interaction with my supervisor had really caught me off guard. Thank you for your responses!

djh123 · Dec 20, 2018

That's a tough situation, and I don't envy you. But on a lighter note, it reminds me of Davey's Waaaaaambulance thread, and a few current and former nurses in my current job. We were talking about one the other day. I like and respect her, but as another nurse says, she's pretty "Waaah".

Been there,done that, ASN, RN · Dec 20, 2018

My response would be " don't know and have no opinion".

The supervisor needs to make their own observations.

KelRN215, BSN, RN · Dec 20, 2018

Don't let the manager make you the unit mole! Everyone hates that person.

JKL33 · Dec 20, 2018

The manager needs to pull them in together for a talk, not drag you into it.

Bottom line. ^

IMO the reason this is the right answer is because people learn the excellent lesson that if they are going to go around ******** about their coworkers, they will be expected to be willing to confront the issue, not gossip about it or tattle-tale about it. Secondly, you learn that if you give others legitimate reason to find fault with your work/attitudes, you very well may be expected to officially defend/answer for yourself and your choices.

Asking an uninvolved third party observer is not the best way and unless the third party is being paid to help manage, it is unfair to involve them in she said/she said messes like this.

CCU BSN RN · Dec 20, 2018

Whatever you say, think about how you will feel when your manager leaks your name as the person who gave the feedback. Essentially, imagine your comments as quotes on the staff bathroom wall. If you would feel comfortable with everyone knowing that YOU said it, including the involved parties...then by all means, go for it. If you would be uncomfortable saying these things in that context...there's a reason. Keep it to yourself. I think that's partially what others are getting at, essentially if they're not criminally unsafe in their practice or stealing narcotics...don't touch it with a 30 foot pole.