Hey Hey! Not going in too much details how did you fare and feel during your first code blue?
So not a nurse but have been around, lol, in the healthcare realm. Rode the rig for 4 years, worked in the OR for a year, and been doing psych for almost 8 years.
For the first time in my close to 10 years working in the healthcare biz was in my first code blue this week. Now I mean seen CPR done about three to four times in my life. One was with a female at the Y (Was working out remember had to pull someone out of the hot tub), other time was during my training as an EMT doing a clinical in the ER, and the other two was where I was a gear runner for REVS/Code Blues for the Hospital. I mean I have seen my share of the deceased before with family and friends love ones. As well as seeing many in the OR when I was down there. Think around twenty individuals.
Though this week was my first-time doing CPR on someone. Not going much into details, I don't know if anyone has had similar experiences with their first time. So, I didn't find the whole aspect of CPR to be exhausting, but it was mentally draining through the whole process. I didn't even do much CPR. I don't know if this makes much sense but so much emotions and hormones are pumping through you once you make that switch off you just want to collapse to the freaking ground. I don't know if anyone can agree or disagree? I only did 4 minutes. I mean if I had to, I would have kept going but it was mentally draining. Time is frozen during a code. Literally think I was in there for 10 minutes and it felt like hours. Can anyone relate?
Was a learning experience and recognize what I could do different if the situation ever arises again in my life.
The patient didn't make it through though unfortunately.
For me think it was hard being reminded of it by my coworkers the day after. Though I do appreciate their support; feel like they are a second family. For me I like to just swallow things up and eventually rack my brain for a week to process things then I can move forward. It is hard for me to open up about my emotions lol. I know though there might be some aftershocks from this incident so that adds some additional stress.
Think the other thing that eats me up is the patient was younger than 40 with children. On our unit our patients are walkers and talkers was literally interacting with this patient 2 to 3 hours prior.
I also have some guilt regarding my CPR. I feel I could of done better and stayed longer. After 4 minutes the shock of doing CPR took over and I needed to switch out. Glad didn't let my pride consume and recognize what was best for the patient.
How were you when you performed CPR for the first time?