Pregnant and Worried New Nurse

Lynnbaker1984 · Jul 27, 2011

Well Sweetie, I hope it all works out for you. I have a 3 year old and having children does make things interesting.. I am not a nurse or LVN yet. I am getting everything ready to go to school. But I understand your stress....but as a nurse you know that stress can cause the baby harm. You need to calm down and take things as they come. Do as you said..wait until the miscarriage risk is lower and ave already started in labor and delivery before you tell you Manager Nurse. I am sure as a woman if you sit down with her then and explain to her your past with miscarriages why you waited to tell her/or him. I will keep you in my prayers. God Bless.

nurseadc · Jul 27, 2011

I'm a firm believer in, "what is meant to be, will be." Keep your head up and things will work out. This is a true blessing for you and your family.

MassED, BSN, RN · Jul 27, 2011

you have NO obligation to tell your manager. Don't tell those friends that work in that hospital either - wait until you're in the clear. No one's business, anyway. What is going on with your body is YOUR business, not anyone elses.

AJPV · Jul 27, 2011

Your manager absolutely cannot legally fire you because you are pregnant. Pregnant women are among the most legally protected workers there are, and HR departments know that. All the same, I still think your plan is very wise (to not tell anyone at work until 2nd trimester. Even at that point, if your manager wants to be professional, she should not interrogate you as to why you waited to tell her. Most women wait to tell even family and friends to make sure there won't be complications. As far as FMLA goes, you might want to start checking into that (without tipping anyone off at work, of course). A lot of jobs require that you have been an employee for 1 year before you can take FMLA, but I'm not sure how that works in your hospital. Even if they don't offer you paid time off, I'm thinking they would probably still be required to offer you unpaid time off and be required to hold your position for you to return after a designated amount of time.

Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN · Jul 27, 2011

you have NO obligation to tell your manager. Don't tell those friends that work in that hospital either - wait until you're in the clear. No one's business, anyway. What is going on with your body is YOUR business, not anyone elses.

until it can't be hidden anymore....I'd wait until you are about 3 months then tell her and explain that you have had miscarriages and wanted to wait til you were sure.......what is mean to be is meant to be...if anyone understands it's an OB unit......besides technicaly it's against the law to discriminate...Good luck and may you have healthy baby!!!!!!

Wobbles · Jul 27, 2011

Thank you all so much for your reply's! I really appreciate your encouragement. It was greatly needed today.

LynnBaker: Thank you for your prayers! Good luck with nursing school!

Nurseadc: Thank you for the encouraging words! I do feel blessed. :)

MassED: I agree!! Thank you. I was just worried about hard feelings, but I think that this will be my best option.

AJPV: That is wonderful news!! Thank you! I have actually been an employee at this hospital for the last 3 years and since I am not breaking employment, just transfering to a new position, I get to keep my FMLA benefits and there will not be a break in them as I have already met my year of employment. I am very relieved over this! I think it is 6-12 weeks (6 paid, 6 unpaid) and they have to hold your position or a similar position.

Esme12: Thank you!! I think that this is the best plan also and I pray that she does understand. She seems like a really wonderful person from my interviews, so I think that she will. The unknown is just scary. :) Thank you so much for your well-wishes!!

obenfermera1 · Jul 27, 2011

you have NO obligation to tell your manager. Don't tell those friends that work in that hospital either - wait until you're in the clear. No one's business, anyway. What is going on with your body is YOUR business, not anyone elses.

Absolutely positively what MassED said!! Pregnancy is supposed to be treated like any other medical issue, which means you have every right to keep it to yourself. Although the flip side is that SOMETIMES it can be nice for your co-workers/charge nurse to know b/c they will often take your condition into consideration when making assignments....for instance, on our floor the pregnant nurses get a free pass on fetal demises for the length of their pregnancy. Of course this consideration isn't required of them (co-workers/charge nurses) but when you're pregnant every little bit of compassion helps, especially early on when you might have your head in a trash can at any moment!

I have no idea what kind of L&D unit you're joining, and of course they are all different in some ways, but just steel yourself ahead of time for possible behind the back eye rolling when you share the news. Not trying to drag you down, just a warning to be realistic like you said: "the new nurse is preggers, it figures!" does get said and we all know it. On a short staffed L&D unit the RN's see orientees as "thank God, a new person to help us out!" and often the more burned out/cynical and outspoken ones will be less than thrilled to hear you'll be out on maternity leave as soon as you get through orientation. My facility is one of the more short staffed/cutthroat type of L&D units and we see this all the time....The poster that mentioned checking into the FMLA requirement was 100% on target too. There's a 12 month employment requirement to qualify for FMLA at my hospital, I think this is pretty standard. Of course this is discretionary, so our manager uses it to weed out the newbies that get pregnant or have other medical issues early on. If you go through orientation and do well and are well liked you get that "discretionary" maternity leave if you've been there less than a year. If you don't do well in orientation or make enough people mad for whatever reason it's "oh congrats on being pregnant, too bad you haven't been here for a year, sorry to see you go!".

I hope you find your L&D unit to be alot more family friendly, but it always pays to be prepared for the worst. This is one of the basic tenets of L&D to begin with, right? Hope for the best but be prepared for the worst! :yeah:

Whatever happens, remember....family comes first and babies are blessings! Good Luck!

obenfermera1 · Jul 27, 2011

Just saw your response post about having already worked at this facility for a while.....In this case, you're GOLDEN! Relax and enjoy your pregnancy! :saint:

Wobbles · Jul 27, 2011

obenfermera1: Thank you so much for your reply! Your honesty and insight is greatly appreciated. I think that all of those "what-if's" if your unit is nice, if your coworkers are nice, if you do good in orientation, etc.. is what is making me feel nervous. But it has helped so much to have all of your replies and encouragement. I agree, family and babies are blessings! I am going to try to take your advice. Work my hardest, be on my best behavior *wink*, and just try to enjoy my pregnancy! I feel like I am heading in the right direction now of "preparing for the worst" while hoping for the best. :) At least I now know what to expect!

AJPV · Jul 27, 2011

That's great news about your FMLA! It sounds like you are all set. I really don't think you're going to run into problems from your manager. If some of the staff nurses want to act like they're in 3rd grade, just ignore their comments and let it roll off your back. You're having a baby and that is so exciting! I think your enthusiasm, work ethic and commitment will be obvious to them and they will be glad you want to come back after having your baby!

Wobbles · Jul 27, 2011

AJPV: THANK YOU!!!!!!!!! Your comment means so much. :)