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Pregnant and Nursing School

Posted

Specializes in Adult Gerontology Primary Care, Palliative. Has 7 years experience.

I really don't mean to sound inconsiderate but I really don't understand pregnant women who have decided to start nursing school. There are two women that I know of that are very pregnant right now in my nursing program, and it's coming to the end of our first semester.. and they are either going to deliever by the end of this semester or the beginning of next semester. I just don't understand how these women will finish the program and handle a new born baby? It just doesn't seem like they put very much thought into family planning and educational planning when they got pregnant? I've seen our next semester schedule and we're going to have 15 hours of clincial experience on its own each week.. that doesn't include traveling to and from school and clincial sites, or the amount of time that will need to be spent studying and preparing for class and clincial experiences.

I guess it's just making me angry because I don't see how these women could possibly give their patient, kids, families, and education the adequate time and not end up giving up one of them.. and the most likely to be dropped would be nursing school. And if they do decide to drop out of the program, then why didn't they think about applying to nursing school or pursuing nursing school til their children were older. Because someone else who doesn't have a million obligations outside of nursing school could have their seat, instead of them dropping out of the program.

I know there is the option of having extra help with children while the new mothers are in school, but as some point they are going to go home and spend time with their families, and their children? Also, it's not like a woman can have a baby on Friday, and then be back at school on Monday.. I'm sure it has happened before but the repercussions of those actions could not have been good.

If anyone can give me some insight into how I can better understand these women and their thought process.. or just give me some words to understand so I don't go crazy with anger.

Thanks!

Why would this be a concern for you in the first place? What does it have to do with you?

QEOLAdvocate

Specializes in Adult Gerontology Primary Care, Palliative. Has 7 years experience.

Why would this be a concern for you in the first place? What does it have to do with you?

You're right.. it's not a concern of mine.. it doesn't have anything to do with me.. but it's just something that is bothering me.. maybe it shouldn't but it does.. so I guess just for my own peace of mind or for me to be able to better understand other people that's why I posted the situation and my thoughts.

Are you serious? you sounds like you have got alot of time.

Things happen in life that you can't control, maybe they weren't planning on having babies at this time, but life happens and you move forward still. I'm sure they will find a way to continue going to school and raise a family in the meantime! I say power to them! But in the meantime too, I would FOY (focus on yourself).

Don't know if this will help you:

I have 5 children - 4 birth control failures! My RN sis actually had the audacity once to tell me that she knows that I couldn't have had that many BC failures and she knows because she is a NURSE! My engineer's response: No wonder you sucked in statistics class! :D

Anyway, I went back to work 6 wks after my oldest was born (called the commander the morning of labor onset...worked the day before!). (USAF Officer). I was out of work when my second was born but found a job before he was 4 mo old (USAF Civil Service). I went back to work 4 weeks after #3 was born (called work the day of labor when my water broke and I was dressed for work!), 2 weeks after #4 was born (worked the day before labor) and 1 week after #5 was born!!!:D:eek: (Mainframe programmer at assorted companies)

Was I a terrible mother? Not according to my kids! For a long time, I was a single mom. We lived in some beautiful homes! I have bought my kids cars, TV's, computers, ipods, xbox 360s, etc....yada yada.

My oldest served four years in the US Army as a Combat medic (is now a veteran and in the reserves) and is taking her NS pre-reqs. She was an honor grad out of HS.

The second is also an Army vet (Helicopter Mechanic). He is in college studying HVAC/R.

The third is also studying HVAC/R.

The fourth is also an honor grad. She attends UNF on scholarship - studying criminal justice. (Dean's list)

The fifth is in HS, all honors courses and has been getting college contacts since her sophomore year!

Let each parent decide what is right for their child. Your beliefs may just be invalid for them.

melmarie23, MSN, RN

Specializes in L&D/Maternity nursing.

Why would this be a concern for you in the first place? What does it have to do with you?

I was just about to ask the same

melmarie23, MSN, RN

Specializes in L&D/Maternity nursing.

You're right.. it's not a concern of mine.. it doesn't have anything to do with me.. but it's just something that is bothering me.. maybe it shouldn't but it does.. so I guess just for my own peace of mind or for me to be able to better understand other people that's why I posted the situation and my thoughts.

I guess I don't see how or why it should bother you at all.

Many women have babies in nursing school or have families going into nursing school and they manage just fine. Sure it is tough at times, but what in life doesn't take work?

QEOLAdvocate

Specializes in Adult Gerontology Primary Care, Palliative. Has 7 years experience.

I'm not trying to decide what these future moms should do for their families or their education, nor am I trying to judge anyone. I don't at all doubt that these women will make good mothers and will raise their children to be contributing members to our society. As for FLmomof5 I understand that different women have different capacities and could go back to work/school within a week of having a child.. I guess because I know people who have had children during nursing school and then had to drop out because it just got too much to handle with a newborn baby.. and I know how these people have had to struggle to handle their lives with the addition of a baby plus nursing school.. and obviously it wasn't easy. I guess I was just trying to understand the thought process.. I wasn't trying to judge anyone or seem self righteous.. and if I offended anyone then I am sorry..

P.S. kikibibi: Why is me thinking about this or wanting insight into this situation make me have too much time on my hands?

The little buns in the oven is what drive these women to work so hard...

I give them all the respect for balancing their pregnancy and academic schedule. It is refreshing to see people challenge and push their abilities by attending school. This is what these women are doing and no baby is going to hold them back, if anything it ll push them to work harder. I have more respect for these women than the girls who gets trashed on weekends being unable to remember having sex with a guy 5hrs ago followed by eating morning after pills like they re daily vitamins

Nursing is about being compassionate and kind, so you can care for others when they are vulnerable. Maybe focus on that?

QEOLAdvocate

Specializes in Adult Gerontology Primary Care, Palliative. Has 7 years experience.

Nursing is about being compassionate and kind, so you can care for others when they are vulnerable. Maybe focus on that?

The little buns in the oven is what drive these women to work so hard...

I give them all the respect for balancing their pregnancy and academic schedule. It is refreshing to see people challenge and push their abilities by attending school. This is what these women are doing and no baby is going to hold them back, if anything it ll push them to work harder. I have more respect for these women than the girls who gets trashed on weekends being unable to remember having sex with a guy 5hrs ago followed by eating morning after pills like they re daily vitamins

I totally agree with your StudentNurseElle I definitely think having a child or children makes these women work harder and I definitely respect the women who are able to make it through nursing school with a child or children.

Elizabelle: I understand what nursing is about.. I don't think I'm being mean or saying anything that would be label me as not being compassionate or kind to these women and their situations.. I just wanted insight...

Elizabelle: I understand what nursing is about.. I don't think I'm being mean or saying anything that would be label me as not being compassionate or kind to these women and their situations.. I just wanted insight...

I'm sorry if I misunderstood you, but your original post stated that you were being driven "crazy with anger" about these women, and you were asking for help with that. I guess I just don't understand how you could be so angry if you were coming from a compassionate perspective. You asked for help in dealing with your emotions, so I was just suggesting that you try to to focus on being compassionate, instead of being angry and resentful.

If what you are really asking for is insight, I have a little more to add that might be helpful. We all know it takes years to get into nursing school. I started taking my pre-reqs in 2007, and I am just now getting to start my nursing program in January of next year. You said these women were getting ready to deliver at the end of the first semester. If I had to guess, they probably didn't plan to have a baby their first semester of nursing school, and they probably got pregnant after applying to the program. Things happen, and babies are a blessing, and often a surprise. I do agree with you that these women have a tough road ahead, but I don't agree with your opinion that they will have to choose between school or taking care of their children. I have 2 beautiful children, and plan on taking very good care of them while I am in school. I also like to think that being a mom will make me a better nurse, too!

You are angry about this? Thats absurd! I am having difficulty seeing the issue here. So what? These women are pregnant. Sometimes things happen in life that were not planned or expected. But I dont neccessarily think being pregnant or having a newborn means you should put all plans on hold. Should the Medical Resident put their residency on hold simply because she is pregnant? Or the Law Student? Or better yet, Shame on those out there who have a career at all and leave their newborn at all! Fact of the matter is, there are many women in various fields who are in schools where the schedule is very demanding, or have careers that are even more demanding. Being pregnant doesnt equate to being a failure.

There were women in my class who were pregnant and have been quite successful in the program. Was it easy for them? Of course not. But they have done what they need to and luckily have support systems in place to help them get through it. I dont consider any of them bad mothers simply because they cannot spend all day with their newborn. Just as I know they do not take having to go to school and leaving their child at home lightly. I admire these women who are able to do both, because I know it is hard.

Mc2182

Specializes in med/surg. Has 3 years experience.

Why would this be a concern for you in the first place? What does it have to do with you?

this exactly.

Eh, I don't see anything wrong with your questions. This is just one of those topics that provoke people. Anywho, I was already pregnant when I applied to the Fall 08 NP and I was accepted. I found out I was preg before I sent my Letter of Intent back so I just declined for "personal reasons". There was no way I was going to Nursing school in my third trimester. I figured I would be cool with starting Spring 09 and putting my 3 month old in daycare. I applied for Spring, had my baby, immediately declined AGAIN. Just couldn't see putting my baby girl in daycare at such a young age. I sniffled a little but postponed Nursing school so I could stay at home and be a mom. I started this Fall and I am so happy I chose to wait. I don't feel guilty about my baby being in daycare now that she's old enough to play with the other babies and she sleeps through the night so I can study late.

Now, there are 2 girls that are pregnant in my program and personally, I disapprove. One is having her baby induced during Christmas break to fit her schedule and the other is just hoping for the best next Spring. I think it's stupid to attend such a difficult program while you're pregnant. I'm in an a condensed program with strict attendance policies and too many things can go wrong while you're pregnant to just cross your fingers and take up a seat.

I found out I was pregnant after passing out in my first set of clinicals for my BSN. That's right. Passed out on the floor of the facility. Kinda freaked my professor out. And since, your asking, I am aware of family planning, but after my OBGYN had told me it would be "highly unlikely" that I not get pregnant without "medical intervention" I stopped taking BC.

So, what happened? I took 5 years to graduate instead of 4. I kept going full-time, but slowed down the clinical classes. I worked part-time during the school year, full-time during the summer. My son was only at daycare during their hours, no one else watched my son unless it was my husband. I was "away" from him no more than a full time job, and I studied at home. Little sleep, and no time for fun. I did not "go out". No parties, no bars, not even a date night with my husband. Family, school, and work for 2 1/2 years of my life.

Gradauted with a 3.94, inducted into Sigma Theta Tau, worked at a hospital pre-graduation and was offered a position before passing NCLEX (which, by the way, took me 75 questions and 30 minutes). My son is well rounded, and I didn't miss any of his major milestones.

So, I hope that gives you some idea how someone does it. It's funny though, while there were people amazed at how I could work, go to school, and be there for my family, I was amazed by those people that would work full-time during school, or go out 4-5 nights a week, or that were so wrapped up in there sororitys functions (particularly during homecoming).

sekotsps

Specializes in Urology.

You should not worry about other people, focus on yourself. There will always be something that bothers you, but you can not be consumed with it. People get pregnant in nursing school, and still are able to focus on family, school and other stuff. Don't be so judgmental!

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