I really don't mean to sound inconsiderate but I really don't understand pregnant women who have decided to start nursing school. There are two women that I know of that are very pregnant right now in my nursing program, and it's coming to the end of our first semester.. and they are either going to deliever by the end of this semester or the beginning of next semester. I just don't understand how these women will finish the program and handle a new born baby? It just doesn't seem like they put very much thought into family planning and educational planning when they got pregnant? I've seen our next semester schedule and we're going to have 15 hours of clincial experience on its own each week.. that doesn't include traveling to and from school and clincial sites, or the amount of time that will need to be spent studying and preparing for class and clincial experiences.
I guess it's just making me angry because I don't see how these women could possibly give their patient, kids, families, and education the adequate time and not end up giving up one of them.. and the most likely to be dropped would be nursing school. And if they do decide to drop out of the program, then why didn't they think about applying to nursing school or pursuing nursing school til their children were older. Because someone else who doesn't have a million obligations outside of nursing school could have their seat, instead of them dropping out of the program.
I know there is the option of having extra help with children while the new mothers are in school, but as some point they are going to go home and spend time with their families, and their children? Also, it's not like a woman can have a baby on Friday, and then be back at school on Monday.. I'm sure it has happened before but the repercussions of those actions could not have been good.
If anyone can give me some insight into how I can better understand these women and their thought process.. or just give me some words to understand so I don't go crazy with anger.
Elizabelle: I understand what nursing is about.. I don't think I'm being mean or saying anything that would be label me as not being compassionate or kind to these women and their situations.. I just wanted insight...
I'm sorry if I misunderstood you, but your original post stated that you were being driven "crazy with anger" about these women, and you were asking for help with that. I guess I just don't understand how you could be so angry if you were coming from a compassionate perspective. You asked for help in dealing with your emotions, so I was just suggesting that you try to to focus on being compassionate, instead of being angry and resentful.
If what you are really asking for is insight, I have a little more to add that might be helpful. We all know it takes years to get into nursing school. I started taking my pre-reqs in 2007, and I am just now getting to start my nursing program in January of next year. You said these women were getting ready to deliver at the end of the first semester. If I had to guess, they probably didn't plan to have a baby their first semester of nursing school, and they probably got pregnant after applying to the program. Things happen, and babies are a blessing, and often a surprise. I do agree with you that these women have a tough road ahead, but I don't agree with your opinion that they will have to choose between school or taking care of their children. I have 2 beautiful children, and plan on taking very good care of them while I am in school. I also like to think that being a mom will make me a better nurse, too!
You are angry about this? Thats absurd! I am having difficulty seeing the issue here. So what? These women are pregnant. Sometimes things happen in life that were not planned or expected. But I dont neccessarily think being pregnant or having a newborn means you should put all plans on hold. Should the Medical Resident put their residency on hold simply because she is pregnant? Or the Law Student? Or better yet, Shame on those out there who have a career at all and leave their newborn at all! Fact of the matter is, there are many women in various fields who are in schools where the schedule is very demanding, or have careers that are even more demanding. Being pregnant doesnt equate to being a failure.
There were women in my class who were pregnant and have been quite successful in the program. Was it easy for them? Of course not. But they have done what they need to and luckily have support systems in place to help them get through it. I dont consider any of them bad mothers simply because they cannot spend all day with their newborn. Just as I know they do not take having to go to school and leaving their child at home lightly. I admire these women who are able to do both, because I know it is hard.
Eh, I don't see anything wrong with your questions. This is just one of those topics that provoke people. Anywho, I was already pregnant when I applied to the Fall 08 NP and I was accepted. I found out I was preg before I sent my Letter of Intent back so I just declined for "personal reasons". There was no way I was going to Nursing school in my third trimester. I figured I would be cool with starting Spring 09 and putting my 3 month old in daycare. I applied for Spring, had my baby, immediately declined AGAIN. Just couldn't see putting my baby girl in daycare at such a young age. I sniffled a little but postponed Nursing school so I could stay at home and be a mom. I started this Fall and I am so happy I chose to wait. I don't feel guilty about my baby being in daycare now that she's old enough to play with the other babies and she sleeps through the night so I can study late.
Now, there are 2 girls that are pregnant in my program and personally, I disapprove. One is having her baby induced during Christmas break to fit her schedule and the other is just hoping for the best next Spring. I think it's stupid to attend such a difficult program while you're pregnant. I'm in an a condensed program with strict attendance policies and too many things can go wrong while you're pregnant to just cross your fingers and take up a seat.
I found out I was pregnant after passing out in my first set of clinicals for my BSN. That's right. Passed out on the floor of the facility. Kinda freaked my professor out. And since, your asking, I am aware of family planning, but after my OBGYN had told me it would be "highly unlikely" that I not get pregnant without "medical intervention" I stopped taking BC.
So, what happened? I took 5 years to graduate instead of 4. I kept going full-time, but slowed down the clinical classes. I worked part-time during the school year, full-time during the summer. My son was only at daycare during their hours, no one else watched my son unless it was my husband. I was "away" from him no more than a full time job, and I studied at home. Little sleep, and no time for fun. I did not "go out". No parties, no bars, not even a date night with my husband. Family, school, and work for 2 1/2 years of my life.
Gradauted with a 3.94, inducted into Sigma Theta Tau, worked at a hospital pre-graduation and was offered a position before passing NCLEX (which, by the way, took me 75 questions and 30 minutes). My son is well rounded, and I didn't miss any of his major milestones.
So, I hope that gives you some idea how someone does it. It's funny though, while there were people amazed at how I could work, go to school, and be there for my family, I was amazed by those people that would work full-time during school, or go out 4-5 nights a week, or that were so wrapped up in there sororitys functions (particularly during homecoming).
You should not worry about other people, focus on yourself. There will always be something that bothers you, but you can not be consumed with it. People get pregnant in nursing school, and still are able to focus on family, school and other stuff. Don't be so judgmental!
elizabelle
160 Posts
Elizabelle: I understand what nursing is about.. I don't think I'm being mean or saying anything that would be label me as not being compassionate or kind to these women and their situations.. I just wanted insight...
I'm sorry if I misunderstood you, but your original post stated that you were being driven "crazy with anger" about these women, and you were asking for help with that. I guess I just don't understand how you could be so angry if you were coming from a compassionate perspective. You asked for help in dealing with your emotions, so I was just suggesting that you try to to focus on being compassionate, instead of being angry and resentful.
If what you are really asking for is insight, I have a little more to add that might be helpful. We all know it takes years to get into nursing school. I started taking my pre-reqs in 2007, and I am just now getting to start my nursing program in January of next year. You said these women were getting ready to deliver at the end of the first semester. If I had to guess, they probably didn't plan to have a baby their first semester of nursing school, and they probably got pregnant after applying to the program. Things happen, and babies are a blessing, and often a surprise. I do agree with you that these women have a tough road ahead, but I don't agree with your opinion that they will have to choose between school or taking care of their children. I have 2 beautiful children, and plan on taking very good care of them while I am in school. I also like to think that being a mom will make me a better nurse, too!