Placed on medical leave...so why do I feel guilty?

Published

Specializes in Med-Surg.

I went in for my 36 week ob appt yesterday. I knew the baby had dropped, and I had been having very mild bh contractions. Cervical check showed I was at 2 cm dilated (not sure how effaced, I didn't think to ask). BP was quite elevated as well (155/105), which was out of my norm. So, she sent me to over to the hospital to be admitted for observation for a few hours. BP was fine by the time I got in a room (135/89 was the highest there), but monitor was showing some fairly regular contractions. She was concerned that staying on my feet would hasten labor, and she wants me to go at least another week.

Anyway, point being, she has placed me on leave 3 weeks earlier then I anticipated, and I am still scheduled for 8 more shifts before my 11-29 due date. Now, i didn't plan this, and I can't help it. And my boss is being great about it, and my co-workers are very supportive. So, why do I feel guilty? I just can't help feeling like I am letting them down.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Hospice, corrections, psychiatry, rehab, LTC.

Your attitude is admirable, but you have more important issues to address. You may well have the chance to reciprocate in the future for the coverage your coworkers are providing now.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Oncology.

I think feeling guilty shows that you must be a really great nurse to work with. You are obviously a hard worker and a good team player. Guilt is such an easy emotion for some of us.

However, as you acknowledged, it's absolutely necessary that you take this time you need for YOU. As you also acknowledged, there's nothing you could have done to prevent this.

I have no real advice, but good luck with the remainder of your pregnancy.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Hospital Education Coordinator.

you are feeling guilty because you know someone is having to shuffle to make the schedule work. However, they did that before your were hired, and many times since due to a multitude of circumstances. You have to take care of YOU, or you will not be able to care for anyone else, including your baby. Also, you probably have more time on your hands right now and, not being used to that, your mind is wandering and worrying. Stop. You will be wishing for that time once the little one is here! Good luck on the pregnancy & delivery!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I felt guilty when I was placed on early leave during my pregnancy as well. I went in for my 18 week ultrasound and found out that I had placentia previa and was given heavy lifting restrictions. And according to my employer (not my OB) if you can't do 100% of your job, you can't work. By the time my placenta had moved up higher, my BP started rising and I ended up delivering him at about 35 1/2 weeks. My boss and coworkers were also wonderful and supportive but I couldn't help but feel like I really let them down. Especially so early in my pregnancy. The best thing I can tell you is just to try not to stress out about it. Try to take it easy and focus on yourself for the next few weeks because very soon there's going to be someone else that you're going to have to focus on!! Good luck!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in LTC, Disease Management, smoking Cessati.

You feel that way because your are the Caregiver, who now needs care. Take care of you and the wee one. That's is most important now, and heck who knows maybe next time you can be supportive of someone who has to do the same!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in SRNA.

You feel this way because this wasn't the plan! Nature bumped up the timeline you had envisioned, and that's okay :) Congratulations on the new addition to your family. I wish you and your new child great health!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in home health, dialysis, others.

You feel this way because you are a NURSE! Now you need to leave the Nurse behind for a while, and become a MOM. You need to relax as much as possible! Take care!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Med/Surg, Ortho, ASC.

"You may well have the chance to reciprocate in the future for the coverage your coworkers are providing now"

What a great way to think of your current circumstances. From one chronically "guilty" person to another, this would make me feel better about the situation.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

ditto on the guilt factor here. i recently had abdominal surgery, and told my supervisor i would plan to return in 3 weeks (22 days to be exact). i knew that was probably pushing it, but i felt rotten for taking that much time off. of course, i ended up having some minor post-op complications. i went to see my surgeon for f/up, told him i was planning to return to work, and he said, no way! i told you 6 weeks! i started crying, and he was slightly amused, and said most patients come for surgical f/up & ask for their time off to be extended. i'm not used to being the patient!!

i felt terrible calling my workplace & telling them i wouldn't be back when i'd said i would be. my poor coworkers. -but- i am so grateful to have had more time off & definitely feel better than i did even last week.

(so, i can tell you not to feel guilty...but i know what you mean. ) ;)

but this is different, jessie! it's you + 1. -don't- feel guilty!!! you gotta take care of yourself & your tiny one. this way, you will have a little more time to prepare, and most importantly, to relax and be off your feet! your coworkers will be fine. think of all the times you've covered for someone, and will again in the future.

take care of yourself! sit down & put your feet up! (weird, isn't it?) you will be running with feedings & diaperings soon enough...then back to work craziness...

prayers for you & for a safe delivery of your newest family member. :heartbeat

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in CTICU.

In the nicest way possible, get over it!

Feeling guilty implies you did something wrong: you didn't. Think of the alternative: go back to work and something happens to your baby.... not an option. Don't stress about things you can't change.

Good luck.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion