Part II: "Nurses Eat Their Young"

[adrikf]

Okay, so this post really has nothing to do with Part I except for the fact that I feel very strongly about both of these topics. First things first:

1. One of my skills instructors told our class that the general public views nurses as the most honest, credible, and trusted professionals out there; nurses are even above teachers and firefighters on that list! I am so excited to know that one day I will become a member of that great profession!
2. Okay so this week in Management of Client Care, we discussed what it means to be a leader and how we as nursing students can adopt new or enhance current leadership traits so we may become honest role models in our profession. I have to say that I thoroughly enjoyed this class as it was an interactive discussion with most students providing stimulating and interesting participation. One of the topics we also discussed was this phenomenon that occurs in nursing; some people may refer to it as "Nurses Eat Their Young." ICK! Well, as stated before, this topic is something that I feel strongly about, and needless to say, I had A LOT to say about it in class!
3. I absolutely hate the fact that this kind of thing goes on in a profession where people are taught and thought to care for others and to advocate for those who may not be able to do so for themselves. It's like an oxymoron! On one hand, nurses are put on a pedestal for being compassionate, caring, and supportive (as well they should be! ) while at the same time there is this icky saying among nurses and students that tends to pop up everywhere! The public seems to value nurses while other nurses and nursing students are the only ones aware that sometimes nursing students / nurses "eat" other nursing students and other nurses!

Anyway, back to the point of my post: it was in this class in which we discussed hitting the "Stop" button on this broken record. It was also this lecture that I happened to forget to hit the "Stop" button on my recorder during the break... I have to say that it was a tad bit hurtful to come home to study and re-listen to this lecture for additional note taking and hear all of the opinions that my fellow nursing students held about me. To them, I didn't have anything to say, was irritating and a waste of their time. There were some nice (sarcasm) comments here and there like "I rarely speak in class but when I do, I have something to say and you can bet that it's going to be great!" and there were some not so nice comments (seriously) that would be better left out of this post... It goes without saying that my feelings were a tad hurt and my ego was a bit wounded but all of that quickly turned to anger. I was p***ED! Not because these people were ripping me to shreds while I was out of the room, but because it was as though they learned NOTHING from our discussion / lecture by our professor!

It amazes me that such ugly behavior can still occur in our nursing school when I reflect back on every nursing course that I've taken. At the beginning of every course, our professors go over a unit reviewing nursing ethical and moral behaviors like advocacy, responsibility, and autonomy. There is always a chapter that encourages students to advocate, not only for their patients, but for themselves. "Speak up about things that you want changed!" "Join nursing committees and groups that have the power to bring about change!" "If you don't like it - do something about it because you've got the power to do so!" Well after reflecting on this a bit I realized that I may have something to say about everything and that often, yes, it would be better to keep my mouth shut, to let others speak too, and to pick and choose my battles. However, I will speak up about topics I feel very strongly about! Why should I hesitate or stop myself from speaking about things that need to be changed just because the students behind me don't want to participate or want to hear it?! I will admit that yes, I may talk too much sometimes and yes, I do sometimes just like the sound of my own voice But I'm going to speak up about things in which I feel strongly about! If everyone decided to shut their mouths and to just sit there quietly because they were afraid of what others would say to them or about them - then things would never change. Today, I'm writing this post because I believe that something needs to be done about the way others are treated in this profession and I believe it can start at the nursing student level. I don't care what others are going to think about me and I won't let that stop me from doing what I believe is right. So there! I hope to get some comments on this post because I'd like to know what others think about this situation. Can there be anything done about this? Do we have the power to help better our attitudes about this profession (internally)? I sure hope so and I'd really like to hear from y'all.

On a lighter note: I understand that not all nurses eat their young. I am ESPECIALLY thankful to the nurses who I've encountered in my short career of being a nursing student, who have taken the time to show me the ropes and who have inspired me in so many indescribable ways. However, I certainly cannot say that every nurse I have come across has taken the time to show me a thing or even acknowledge me for that matter! Whenever my preceptor happens to be a nurse who'd rather not deal with a nursing student that day for whatever reason, I just remind myself of a few things. The clinical experience should be a learning experience but it doesn't have to be all about me nor is it about how irritated it makes me that that nurse doesn't want to instruct me or even acknowledge my existence; it's all about my patient! It is my patient who benefits on those days (as it should be) because he or she gets to enjoy constant company and care the whole day from a really cool nursing student .

Alright, my rant is over for now! J Thanks to all that stuck around till the end of this long post. (if anyone... haha)

[mazy]

You say that you don't care what anyone thinks, that you like the sound of your own voice, and that you don't have any problem speaking your mind regardless of how it effects other people or whether it crowds out their own abilities to say what they want to say.

In a sense you have summed up the essence of the characteristics you will find from a nurse who "eats her young." So God bless and good work.

But if you are interested in discussing the subject you can do a search on this site and find thousands of conversations about it.

[adrikf]

"In a sense you have summed up the essence of the characteristics you will find from a nurse who "eats her young." So God bless and good work."

I can see how my comments have lead you to make that assumption. This post, although lengthy, is just one aspect about myself and my personality that I have decided to share. You can make that assumption and add your judgments and predictions about my future as a nurse; however, I just would like to point out that you're making that prediction based on only a few comments that I have made in my post. There is much more to me as a person than what those comments may portray.

I am very excited about my decision to become a nurse even though there may be a few things about it that aren't necessarily attractive (because every profession does). I believe it's my calling and I know that I possess the characteristics that make a good nurse. I also know that there is still a lot to learn and that's what makes this profession so exciting! - it's a constant learning experience!

[adrikf]

and i disagree with your assumption that I will say whatever I want regardless of how it affects other people. That is not what i meant by my post. I'm not an ugly person who just goes around telling people whatever I think whenever I think it. I was just focusing on the fact that in a profession which is viewed to be so caring and supportive to patients, why is there this saying that pops up so frequently?? I know that the patient is the priority but when nurses and nursing students act that way toward each other - it is in fact, the patient who actually suffers from it. because in the end, it is that behavior which negatively affects nursing care.

Also - I'd like to clarify that through my experience of what happened in my class that day - I have learned a few things:

a. I should remember that although I know i will have something to say about everything, I realize that I should pick and choose my battles and that I do not have to say everything that I may be thinking about a particular situation

b. I should remember that when I am talking - someone else is getting to talk. I don't want to be the person in the class that talks the entire time never letting anyone else express their thoughts, feelings, and beliefs.

c. And my main point (and what I really meant to be the focus of this entire topic is): Speak up for what you believe in and don't let others' cruel comments or ugly attitudes scare you away from expressing what's important to you

[Monalatte]

I LOVE IT! LOL we must be twins separated at birth. Wonderfully stated and thank you for speaking up. I am at the end of my pre-reqs so I haven't started the program or been accepted for that matter. However, I am very confident and won't stop until I am. It's people like you who are leaders in change. Someday, when it counts, they are going to come to you to speak up and I am sure you will . Don't be discouraged.

Thanks for sharing

A fellow "talker"

Okay, so this post really has nothing to do with Part I except for the fact that I feel very strongly about both of these topics. First things first:

1. One of my skills instructors told our class that the general public views nurses as the most honest, credible, and trusted professionals out there; nurses are even above teachers and firefighters on that list! I am so excited to know that one day I will become a member of that great profession!
   
2. Okay so this week in Management of Client Care, we discussed what it means to be a leader and how we as nursing students can adopt new or enhance current leadership traits so we may become honest role models in our profession. I have to say that I thoroughly enjoyed this class as it was an interactive discussion with most students providing stimulating and interesting participation. One of the topics we also discussed was this phenomenon that occurs in nursing; some people may refer to it as "Nurses Eat Their Young." ICK! Well, as stated before, this topic is something that I feel strongly about, and needless to say, I had A LOT to say about it in class!
   
3. I absolutely hate the fact that this kind of thing goes on in a profession where people are taught and thought to care for others and to advocate for those who may not be able to do so for themselves. It's like an oxymoron! On one hand, nurses are put on a pedestal for being compassionate, caring, and supportive (as well they should be! ) while at the same time there is this icky saying among nurses and students that tends to pop up everywhere! The public seems to value nurses while other nurses and nursing students are the only ones aware that sometimes nursing students / nurses "eat" other nursing students and other nurses!
   

Anyway, back to the point of my post: it was in this class in which we discussed hitting the "Stop" button on this broken record. It was also this lecture that I happened to forget to hit the "Stop" button on my recorder during the break... I have to say that it was a tad bit hurtful to come home to study and re-listen to this lecture for additional note taking and hear all of the opinions that my fellow nursing students held about me. To them, I didn't have anything to say, was irritating and a waste of their time. There were some nice (sarcasm) comments here and there like "I rarely speak in class but when I do, I have something to say and you can bet that it's going to be great!" and there were some not so nice comments (seriously) that would be better left out of this post... It goes without saying that my feelings were a tad hurt and my ego was a bit wounded but all of that quickly turned to anger. I was p***ed! Not because these people were ripping me to shreds while I was out of the room, but because it was as though they learned NOTHING from our discussion / lecture by our professor!

It amazes me that such ugly behavior can still occur in our nursing school when I reflect back on every nursing course that I've taken. At the beginning of every course, our professors go over a unit reviewing nursing ethical and moral behaviors like advocacy, responsibility, and autonomy. There is always a chapter that encourages students to advocate, not only for their patients, but for themselves. "Speak up about things that you want changed!" "Join nursing committees and groups that have the power to bring about change!" "If you don't like it - do something about it because you've got the power to do so!" Well after reflecting on this a bit I realized that I may have something to say about everything and that often, yes, it would be better to keep my mouth shut, to let others speak too, and to pick and choose my battles. However, I will speak up about topics I feel very strongly about! Why should I hesitate or stop myself from speaking about things that need to be changed just because the students behind me don't want to participate or want to hear it?! I will admit that yes, I may talk too much sometimes and yes, I do sometimes just like the sound of my own voice But I'm going to speak up about things in which I feel strongly about! If everyone decided to shut their mouths and to just sit there quietly because they were afraid of what others would say to them or about them - then things would never change. Today, I'm writing this post because I believe that something needs to be done about the way others are treated in this profession and I believe it can start at the nursing student level. I don't care what others are going to think about me and I won't let that stop me from doing what I believe is right. So there! I hope to get some comments on this post because I'd like to know what others think about this situation. Can there be anything done about this? Do we have the power to help better our attitudes about this profession (internally)? I sure hope so and I'd really like to hear from y'all.

On a lighter note: I understand that not all nurses eat their young. I am ESPECIALLY thankful to the nurses who I've encountered in my short career of being a nursing student, who have taken the time to show me the ropes and who have inspired me in so many indescribable ways. However, I certainly cannot say that every nurse I have come across has taken the time to show me a thing or even acknowledge me for that matter! Whenever my preceptor happens to be a nurse who'd rather not deal with a nursing student that day for whatever reason, I just remind myself of a few things. The clinical experience should be a learning experience but it doesn't have to be all about me nor is it about how irritated it makes me that that nurse doesn't want to instruct me or even acknowledge my existence; it's all about my patient! It is my patient who benefits on those days (as it should be) because he or she gets to enjoy constant company and care the whole day from a really cool nursing student .

Alright, my rant is over for now! J Thanks to all that stuck around till the end of this long post. (if anyone... haha)

[dayanara]

It's funny how we take our time posting something that may be beneficial or interesting for other students and there goes someone that has something negative or sarcastic to say about it. Don't worry about it and don't waste your time replying. I really believe only negative and hateful people leave negative replies to posts. They are just supporting your theory:-) I would never leave a judgmental post to someone. If I don't have anything positive to say, I shut the f&:k off, but that's just me:-)

I really like your train of thought and appreciate your honesty. I also think that it is a contradiction that nurses while being supposed to be caring, humble, and respectful of others are sometimes mean and rude to other people. I am not being judgmental and I am not generalizing. My mother passed away 7 years ago after being sick with diabetes and heart disease for a long time. I was in and out of hospitals for years, and I can truly say that only a handful of nurses were genuinely compassionate and caring with my mother. That's with a patient, imagine with a student or co-worker! :-(

When an individual is genuinely caring it doesn't matter who the person is and whether you are having a good day or not! There's definitely a lot of "fakes" out there! And whoever answers to my post in a negative way can include themselves in that category:-b

[FDW630]

I get your point, but you lose me when you put nurses on a pedestal above other equally self-sacrificing professions. I have to say that having spent so much time in nursing textbooks lately, this has become one of my pet peeves. My husband is a firefighter, and there is no way in he!! I would ever do his job. I think it's harder and more of a risk than nursing. But he sees it as just a job he enjoys doing...no heroics, and he hates being singled out like that. That is an attitude I strive for as a nurse, and I wouldn't be caught lifting myself and my job above anyone elses. I do agree with your eating the young thing though. In everyday life, dealing with other women, I find it to be an issue. Not just in nursing school. It's a shame.

[OB-nurse2013, BSN, RN]

I get your point, but you lose me when you put nurses on a pedestal above other equally self-sacrificing professions. I have to say that having spent so much time in nursing textbooks lately, this has become one of my pet peeves. My husband is a firefighter, and there is no way in he!! I would ever do his job. I think it's harder and more of a risk than nursing. But he sees it as just a job he enjoys doing...no heroics, and he hates being singled out like that. That is an attitude I strive for as a nurse, and I wouldn't be caught lifting myself and my job above anyone elses. I do agree with your eating the young thing though. In everyday life, dealing with other women, I find it to be an issue. Not just in nursing school. It's a shame.

I don't think she is putting nursing above those other positions. It's from some sort of US survey or otehr such thing that the public voted nurses as the most "trusted profession" and for almost ten years except for in 2011 when firgefighters were rated #1. I know this because my professor's have also told us this, unfortunately I did not pay enough attention to tell you the exact name of where this info comes from :) I could have googled it and probably found it and included it in my post but alas I have far too much h/w.

[Yogalimbs]

I have to say that I really enjoyed reading this and know exactly what you're talking about, but do agree with the other lady that this isn't just a problem in school, it's everywhere. But you are strong as far as I can tell, and it's people like us that will help change things for the better. Never back down, and don't change for the worse. Keep on keeping on, I've seen people change because they were too rude, and I think some people just need people like you to show them HOW MUCH THEY CARE. You care a lot and that matters in this field.

[adrikf]

So sorry to have given you the wrong impression in my post. I was not saying that I personally put nurses on a pedestal. As an attempt to inspire our class ( I'm guessing??) our skills instructor opened one of his lectures with a some statistic or poll indicating the most credible and trusted professions. Now I don't know where he got this information nor do I know if this poll even exists??? I guess I was just using it as a way to reiterate the idea of this contradiction that exists in nursing. Plus, I dont know how anyone could even compare these different professions in the first place.?? What about the policewomen and the policemen? Or how could anyone compare a doctor to a soldier? I'm just thankful that we live in a world where there are many different professions that are admirable and heroic - each in their own way.

Also - thanks to your husband for his bravery and for risking his life by doing the job he loves to do. My boyfriend is a retired marine and I'm with you on the subject - I'd never be able to survive a day in the life of a soldier

[amoLucia]

I don't think she is putting nursing above those other positions. It's from some sort of US survey or otehr such thing that the public voted nurses as the most "trusted profession" and for almost ten years except for in 2011 when firgefighters were rated #1. I know this because my professor's have also told us this, unfortunately I did not pay enough attention to tell you the exact name of where this info comes from :) I could have googled it and probably found it and included it in my post but alas I have far too much h/w.

I did google and found something about a poll from the Gallup people. It rated nursing #1 for honesty and ethics. Don't know if this was the same poll your instructor referred to.

I vaguely remember a poll some time ago like this, but there was a SECOND part. The poll then asked the repondents if they would want their daughters (sons) to become nurses. Nursing then droppped in its ranking SIGNIFICANTLY to like maybe #16 on the list (or some other quite low number).

Oh yeah ... like nursing is so noble and wonderful and great ... yeah, noble, wonderful and great for YOUR kids, but not for MINE. So much for lofty recognition and respect!

[adrikf]

Whoa. Now that's an interesting post