Okay, so this post really has nothing to do with Part I except for the fact that I feel very strongly about both of these topics. First things first:
One of my skills instructors told our class that the general public views nurses as the most honest, credible, and trusted professionals out there; nurses are even above teachers and firefighters on that list! I am so excited to know that one day I will become a member of that great profession!
Okay so this week in Management of Client Care, we discussed what it means to be a leader and how we as nursing students can adopt new or enhance current leadership traits so we may become honest role models in our profession. I have to say that I thoroughly enjoyed this class as it was an interactive discussion with most students providing stimulating and interesting participation. One of the topics we also discussed was this phenomenon that occurs in nursing; some people may refer to it as "Nurses Eat Their Young." ICK! Well, as stated before, this topic is something that I feel strongly about, and needless to say, I had A LOT to say about it in class!
I absolutely hate the fact that this kind of thing goes on in a profession where people are taught and thought to care for others and to advocate for those who may not be able to do so for themselves. It's like an oxymoron! On one hand, nurses are put on a pedestal for being compassionate, caring, and supportive (as well they should be! ) while at the same time there is this icky saying among nurses and students that tends to pop up everywhere! The public seems to value nurses while other nurses and nursing students are the only ones aware that sometimes nursing students / nurses "eat" other nursing students and other nurses!
Anyway, back to the point of my post: it was in this class in which we discussed hitting the "Stop" button on this broken record. It was also this lecture that I happened to forget to hit the "Stop" button on my recorder during the break... I have to say that it was a tad bit hurtful to come home to study and re-listen to this lecture for additional note taking and hear all of the opinions that my fellow nursing students held about me. To them, I didn't have anything to say, was irritating and a waste of their time. There were some nice (sarcasm) comments here and there like "I rarely speak in class but when I do, I have something to say and you can bet that it's going to be great!" and there were some not so nice comments (seriously) that would be better left out of this post... It goes without saying that my feelings were a tad hurt and my ego was a bit wounded but all of that quickly turned to anger. I was p***ED! Not because these people were ripping me to shreds while I was out of the room, but because it was as though they learned NOTHING from our discussion / lecture by our professor!
It amazes me that such ugly behavior can still occur in our nursing school when I reflect back on every nursing course that I've taken. At the beginning of every course, our professors go over a unit reviewing nursing ethical and moral behaviors like advocacy, responsibility, and autonomy. There is always a chapter that encourages students to advocate, not only for their patients, but for themselves. "Speak up about things that you want changed!" "Join nursing committees and groups that have the power to bring about change!" "If you don't like it - do something about it because you've got the power to do so!" Well after reflecting on this a bit I realized that I may have something to say about everything and that often, yes, it would be better to keep my mouth shut, to let others speak too, and to pick and choose my battles. However, I will speak up about topics I feel very strongly about! Why should I hesitate or stop myself from speaking about things that need to be changed just because the students behind me don't want to participate or want to hear it?! I will admit that yes, I may talk too much sometimes and yes, I do sometimes just like the sound of my own voice But I'm going to speak up about things in which I feel strongly about! If everyone decided to shut their mouths and to just sit there quietly because they were afraid of what others would say to them or about them - then things would never change. Today, I'm writing this post because I believe that something needs to be done about the way others are treated in this profession and I believe it can start at the nursing student level. I don't care what others are going to think about me and I won't let that stop me from doing what I believe is right. So there! I hope to get some comments on this post because I'd like to know what others think about this situation. Can there be anything done about this? Do we have the power to help better our attitudes about this profession (internally)? I sure hope so and I'd really like to hear from y'all.
On a lighter note: I understand that not all nurses eat their young. I am ESPECIALLY thankful to the nurses who I've encountered in my short career of being a nursing student, who have taken the time to show me the ropes and who have inspired me in so many indescribable ways. However, I certainly cannot say that every nurse I have come across has taken the time to show me a thing or even acknowledge me for that matter! Whenever my preceptor happens to be a nurse who'd rather not deal with a nursing student that day for whatever reason, I just remind myself of a few things. The clinical experience should be a learning experience but it doesn't have to be all about me nor is it about how irritated it makes me that that nurse doesn't want to instruct me or even acknowledge my existence; it's all about my patient! It is my patient who benefits on those days (as it should be) because he or she gets to enjoy constant company and care the whole day from a really cool nursing student .
Alright, my rant is over for now! J Thanks to all that stuck around till the end of this long post. (if anyone... haha)
I know what you mean. Now that I think about it - I didn't know much about what it took to be a nurse until I started nursing school (hardley ever in the hospital or health clinic; never seriously injured myself either). Being a nursing student, I've noticed that it's often other nurses, nursing texts, or our nursing educators who/that are the ones praising or glorifying the great profession of nursing. If nursing educators incorporate such methods that intend to inspire us in becoming such competent and prudent nurses who provide quality care (in an ethical and professional manner) to our patients then there ought to be the same methods incorporated in our nursing education that also remind us or "teach" us to treat each other with that same dignity and respect. ESPECIALLY when everyone involved in the profession is so aware that such a nasty euphemism exists within the nursing culture!!
I'd like to believe that everyone is inherently respectful, caring, and kind to others in the first place. Without having to be coached or taught on how to do it!
This topic has been done to death, there are countless threads on this topic.
I was in the workforce for over 25 years before I went into nursing. There are mean, nasty people in every profession you can think of. It doesn't matter whether you work at McDonald's or you're the CEO of an oil company.
Worry about yourself, be the best person you can be and set an example other people will want to emulate.
Yup - sure there is and I know this topic must be so done to death but how sad that it's STILL A TOPIC that is still around
it appears you are already very much aware of the issue so I am terribly sorry to have wasted your time with my redundancy
I just wanted to share my personal story and the lesson and realization I gained from the whole situation. I'm new the nursing world and new to this website for the most part and I have only recently began to actually post much on here. Is there a rule which states I cannot start my own post on a particular topic if there are currently countless threads about this already posted ?? I'm sorry - still don't know my way around here.
"There are mean, nasty people in every profession you can think of" - I agree:
Nursing will be my second degree. Before, I worked at a mental health mental retardation organization and I'm aware that this kind of thing happens everywhere. Just got done discussing the same thing with my therapist! When I discovered all of the nasty and ugly things my fellow students were saying about me (heard word for word - left the recorder on accidentally during the break) I was pretty upset. But I have made the decision to suck it up, get over it, and move on. I don't care that those broads don't like me. Because I like myself and I like the person who I am today (always room for improvement of course) and I understand that there will ALWAYS be people who do not like you and there will always be the gossipers and the jacka**es who find it easier to point out everyone elses' short comings instead of their own.
It's appears to be just a fact of life - and if I were to come home crying, deciding toquit this nursing school just b/c the bullies were being mean to me - chances are that when I decided to enroll again - in another school or in another program - it'd be the same situation but different people.
Last thing: I appreciate your advice - be the best person you can be and lead by example - people are ugly sometimes but I can't change them and it isn't my place to do so anyway
People (and nurses) come in all shapes, sizes, persuasions, upbringings, values, etc. Though, it does seem that nursing tends to attract a large proportion of type A personalities. Everyone you'll meet has a different perspective on most anything under the sun and people don't often agree on everything. That's a given, as I'm sure you know.
I think what bothers me most about your situation though, is that your classmates chose to hold their views until they thought you wouldn't be around to challenge them. It's cowardly and it adds nothing to the discussion. People who constantly seek validation of their perspective while actively avoiding any opposition, irk me. How can someone expect to understand anything outside of themselves if they don't allow their views to be challenged? The people who avoid opposing view points while also criticizing anyone who doesn't agree with them are doubly frustrating and insufferable.
I can understand your frustration. But I must say, I was an Executive Assistant for many years, working in various offices and you should see the backstabbing and gossip in an office environment. This is not just a nursing issue it happens in every walk of life. If there are a couple things I've learned; do your job, don't talk badly about people (because you never know when you will need this person) and don't get caught up in the negativity. Let them say what they want, they will anyway. People always have opinions about you, right or wrong. Show them what you've got, show them you are a good person, be the best you can be and all that other stuff will go away.
I really apprciate your blog...both of them! I find it completly intimidating being in class and haveing the "mean girls" in your class snickering, talking bad about you, and even setting you up to look stupid. I am a 32 year old woman who has never been to college accept now, and I still get the "pit" in my stomach when I encounter fellow students like that.
My daughter was in the hospital not too long ago and I talked to all of her RNs and they all said the same thing. It's people like that, that won't last in this profession. This profession is all about careing, and having compassion for people. People who "eat their young" don;t have what it takes to be successful in this field and will burn out. They said that it is not a glamerious job, and when you get right down to it, the pay isn't all that grand either, but knowing you helped at least one person that day allows you the freedom to lay your head on that pillow at night.
I took solice in that. I am not a young woman by any means and I finally get the chance to have a career instead of a job. I'm not in school to make friends, or "fit in" or try to re live some high school fantacy. I am there to learn about my career, and how to be the best I can be at my career. The thought 'they don't have what it takes' keeps echoing in my head. I have what it takes! I care about people...patients, fellow students, professors, and preceptors. The "mean girls" are not going to give me the fulfillment that a RN career can. They are not going to provide me fincaial stablility, help provide for my family. I am not going to try to get them to care about me. I dismiss them wish them luck and care on with the method that helps me learn the best.
It's sad but there will always be people like them....but the main point I think you where trying to make and I agree with is: Always be the bigger person, keep your head up eyes forward, with a smile on your face and wish them a good day and carry on. The best revenge you can inflick on someone is be happy.
Thank you again for writing such an encouraging blog. Keep'em coming
Wow, I'm sorry you had the experience of hearing the sniping. I'd approach a couple of them 1-1 and tell them that the break was recorded along with the lecture and I'd like to discuss the comment she made. I'd hold her accountable for her words and let her know they were hurtful. The aim of this would be to release my resentment, likely get an apology and hopefully get the class to think before they speak attacking someone behind their back. Altho, I'm guilty of it myself sometimes. I do try not to say anything that I wouldn't be willing to say to the person directly, but it happens and this was a reminder to me!
) while at the same time there is this icky saying among nurses and students that tends to pop up everywhere! The public seems to value nurses while other nurses and nursing students are the only ones aware that sometimes nursing students / nurses "eat" other nursing students and other nurses!
amoLucia
7,736 Posts
I guess they must all be healthy folk, not the sick ones in healthcare facilities who fill out those dissatisfaction surveys!