Overwhelmed

elprup, BSN, RN · May 9, 2012

Butterflykisses- my first job didnt work out and neither did my second one in Long Term Care. FYI - and I did not qualify for any New Graduate Nurse programs because I had experience, but I did not have enough experience for an RN job! So I became a new old stale grad. But, I totally agree with you that we should not have to sale our souls for any job. There are over 590,000 members on AllNurses....I would think if we all stood together we could make nursing more functional rather than dysfunctional.

elprup, BSN, RN · May 9, 2012

Oh my, for me LTC/Nursing Home was worse.....28 patients for an 8 hour shift minus 1/2 hour lunch and 2 15 min breaks = 15 min allowed for each patient. For me, that was not ok. I know some are awesome at LTC, not me :)

IEDave, ASN, CNA, LVN · May 9, 2012

My :twocents: - sounds to me like THEY didn't make it past YOUR 90 day probation period. And no, I'm not being even remotely funny - far too often people assume that they're somehow beholden to a given employer, which is most decidedly not the case.

Couple of things I'd recommend, now that the deed is done: first, make 2 lists; one, of things you liked about the position and one, of things you hated about the position. Once you've done that, sort them - on the "like" list, put the one thing that really jazzed you about the place at the top of the list, then the next favorite, and so on. On the "hated" list, likewise you put the one thing that really ticked you off about the place at the top of the list, then next, and so on.

Having done this (it's called a "needs assessment", BTW) - you've now got some ammo for looking for your next job. Rather than looking for job ads for existing positions, you might want to head over to the Medicare website and look at some of the pages they have that rate individual facilities (they have 'em for hospitals, LTC, & IIRC home health) and try being a little more selective on the next go. Also, since Medicare gets their rating information from the individual states, you may wish to try looking for a website that has this info for your state - oftentimes you can get some real fine-grained info on individual employers this way (California's got one at CalQualityCare.org - Your Guide to Long Term Care in California that's a real blessing - even includes average salary info & staff turnover rates; just superb) so you can avoid some of the baddies.

When you go into your interview - take those 2 lists and try to establish a dialog with your interviewer. Ask them how they feel about the items on both lists - do they tolerate such things? Do they encourage them? Most interviewers'll be glad to answer those types of questions, because let's face it - it's not in their best interest to hire people that'll be miserable at work.

While it's not a guarantee that you're going to get a "perfect fit" for job #2, at least it'll stack the deck a bit more in your favor when you're ready to give it another try.

----- Dave

superiornursing · May 9, 2012

I admire your courage to move away from a situation that was definitely not doing you any good.For too long nurses were encourage to endure the harshest of conditions especially those that are not neccessary.

I have found the mentality of nurses mainly to be one of thinking that they always have to be the sacrificial lambs.And that is far from the truth.New grads are almost always taken advantage of.Good employers in the future will even applaud your stance.

Forgive your family as it relates to their reaction and release yourself from guilt.

As a person I am certain you have an expectation of what a reasonable employment situation as a nurse should offer.All of us know this and somehow many of us accept what is offered with no intention of asking for more.Continue to expect more frmo your employer and continue to value yourself.

I have had similar problems and I am proud to say that I have walked away from more than one employment situation which promised big and delivered little.What followed was always better situations and opportunities-I am still a Nurse after 15+ years.

In this profession you must be able to build friendships and support relationships in your employment situation and in your private life and use them.

In my mind you are a good nurse because you cared for yourself today that you can look after somene else in the future.

Take heart you are not alone.I wish you good success in your new and better employment situation.

Superior Nursing

precipice · May 9, 2012

when we announcing "i've been accepted to nursing school" and then during our years of nursing we are literally SHOWERED with support and understanding, adoration, encouragement, prayers, vendors fairs, university fairs, staff recruiters. at some point (while getting all this LOVE) nursing students begin to tell each other, "the only negative in the whole darn process to become a nurse is our mean, hyper-vigilant, tricky, picky, a retentive, can't please 'um instructors." then outside of classes support and understanding is overwhelmingly convincing. we students go on to discuss & decide to conclude, "our supporters are absolutely 100% correct, we can do this & out of school no instructors will be picking on us." so we get our first real nurse job, everything IS great no instructors. then one day we ask ourself, "WHAT HAPPENED TO MY DAMNED SUPPORT. IT WAS EVERYWHERE BUT NOW - OMG - I WANT AT LEAST MY SUPPORT BACK". we want to perfectly practice nursing. unrealistically we want to demonstrate what the supporters told us all along "you got this". my point is that during nursing school you just about can do no wrong in the eyes of the non-nursing world. once the late hours, Hard Physical Labor, mental clarity in crisis,emotions,personalities,fluctuating levels of frustration take a toll, the supportors outside of nursing stand around with their jaws dropped when we express events to them. they can seldom "see" because they are now to you, "a lay person". it is hurtful that they seem to imply the problem is you not doing "something" right. what we wish for them to say is that they trust our decision to change jobs. it would feel good to hear family say they believe we are doing our best and that they would cry too just being around ill people, their families. that they would validate that workplaces have politics. so we do experience a HUGH shift in support leading to learning additional coping skills, focusing on new nurse preceptor guided orientation, clarifying and honing our unique ability within the profession. hang in there, look for peer support groups with facilitators that are nurses.

Andy Droid · May 9, 2012

I wanted to post on this board because I don't really feel like I am getting a lot of support or understanding in the non-nursing world. I recently quit my job at the hospital I worked at. I am technically a new grad and had only been working there for 3 months. I am getting a lot of criticism from some family members (one who is a nurse) about not hanging in there and about not trying hard enough. I was beyond miserable,overwhelmed,depressed,stressed,crying most nights and at home becuase of where I worked. There was a huge turnover rate & not ever enough nurses or help of any kind. I felt like I was stuck in a nightmare. Even though I know at times we all have to stay and catch up, it was becoming a pattern for me to be working 15 hour "nights" and I felt if I stayed my sanity would not be intact right now. I am the 4th person that I graduated with who left this particular hospital. Although I am feeling better, I am now looking for another job,which is stressful as well. Has anyone else ever had the problem of family not understanding what you go through as a nurse?I felt so ashamed of leaving and feeling like I wasn't tough enough or headstrong. Any replies would be appreciated.

I would definitely bail on a job like that. Nurse/ computer tech / retail clerk / burger flipper.... doesn't matter... working conditions like the ones you described aren't worth it when you're health / sanity is on the line. (the high turn over rate says others agree)

If I had to guess why your friends / family would have issue, it might be because leaving "a job" after only 3 months isn't exactly a selling point on a resume... and you won't always be able to tell the story of why.

Esme12, ASN, BSN, RN · May 9, 2012

Thank You for the replies. I struggled with the decision to quit due to finances as well. My husband works, but his work has been slow. I had a hard decision to make, but felt that staying would do more damage than good. I didn't want this experience to taint my whole outlook of nursing.

I haven't read all the responses as I usually do but.......While I agree you had to leave, I really feel you should have stuck it out until you had another job. Jobs are hard to find these days and it is much easier to find a job when you already have one. The first year after graduation is the hardest because nursing BEARS ABSOLUTELY NO RESEMBLENCE to what we thought it was or what we thought is was in school.

I wish you the best.:hug:

Snoozyzzz · May 9, 2012

I too went through something much like you although I was not smart enough to leave...I went into a severe depression, crippling panic and anxiety attacks to the extent of not being able to leave my house. Short story, my floor was painfully understaffed, (as most hospitals are) the rest of the negative I choose to leave in the past as a life lesson. I went through 2years extensive therapy and cognitive therapy to "get myself on track" I was very blessed to have RN's in my life that would not let me give up.. they were patient, kind and supportive without coddling me. . Today I work as a home health RN and have never been happier!!! I still have my moments...but they are moments....there are so many different areas of nursing you could go into..don't give up...find what is right for you...there are great wonderful experienced RN's out there willing to help if you are willing to learn...you are the one that determines the Nurse you want to be..and to all you bedside RN's,LPN's,PCT's I keep you in my morning prayers and am grateful you are there to care for the patients who need you so desperately!!

FLboundBSN · May 9, 2012

You had to do what was best for YOU! Nevermind what other people say --- they dont know and didnt know what you went through. It's easy to say "hang in there" looking in from the outside. It seems to me that you made the right choice to leave due to the high turnover and other factors that made that hospital NOT A GOOD PLACE to work.

Go get yourself together, see about getting away for a few days by yourself (or with your honey), somewhere nice, even at a Bed & Breakfast, go horseback riding or to a mountainous state with pretty mountainous views or to a beach location. Get some fresh air and clear your mind, then come back refreshed to pound the pavement. Don't try so hard. Something good will come your way. Good luck sweetheart! :hug:

FLboundBSN · May 9, 2012

you should have stuck it out until you had another job.

I think her sanity was more important than money at her breaking point. She could borrow from friends and family, getting back her sanity would have taken a worse toll on her - like what happened to Snoozyzzz.

I commend her for standing up for herself and her mental well being.

pkkunjappa · May 9, 2012

every proffession has their own difficulties ... if you try to change the proffession i dont think its going to help you.. instead of that try to love your job with the situations ... eventually you will be allright .. keep it in mind that nursing is a service than a proffesion ... to all frustrated nurses

sherdk · May 9, 2012

You should hold you head up high since you have finished your nursing course.. Often others do not know the responsibilities and time contraints placed on us as nurses and how this affects every other aspect of our lives. It sounds to me that you made the correct decision by resigning from your previous employment. Employers need to have a system whereby new nurses get the support that is needed to function properly in an environment that is safe and healthy for the individual and allows time to provide quality patient care. When you start out in nursing-- this is the time that you actually learn more than you do when you are completing your nursing course/ degree. Hang in there !!!! there are so many areas of nursing other than hospital nursing-- hopefully you will find the one that is best for you!!!