Old, made mistakes, looking for a miracle

Tweety, BSN, RN · Aug 1, 2006

Many people are 2nd takers and hopefully will be able to help you.

Seems like you are your own worst enemy at the moment. Your fears and low esteem are very self-defeating, but you can do something about that. Put the past behind you and watch how you talk to yourself. You are worthy to get this nursing license. You are not a failure as a person, you've had what it takes to make it through nursing school, you've come through some hard knocks and you're still on top.

Follow Suzanne's plans. Study. It's a dreadful test. Let go of the wreckage and garbage of the past without regrets.

Good luck. Hopefully more people will come along to offer support and advice.

p.s. you're doing a good job navigating the site. If you haven't seen it, there's a video: https://allnurses.com/forums/f246/video-getting-started-allnurses-com-149297.html

And one more thing while I'm lecturing you on self-talk........do not use the word "old" when referring to youself. That's an order!! :)

Pick yourself up, dust yourself off, love yourself. Take care.

twallum · Aug 1, 2006

Tweety thanks, this is just what I need, love and stroking, I do not have that physically in my life so when I get it by words I feel it. I am going to follow Suzannes suggestion but I would like to know more of the game plan. Does it cost money?? What is the 6 week program?? Do I have to go through this entire book before the program??? How about if I cannot do any better, my brain is so weary and I am really feeling drained from this whole long road. Tweety, can i stay in touch with you and if so, where do I find you to get to your support, I need your support and appreciate.

RNsRWe, ASN, RN · Aug 1, 2006

Hi, Twallum.....I would suggest posting a message on the NCLEX Discussion Board here (it's under the Nursing Student boards). There, you'll find all kinds of people studying for the very same test, and it's a supportive environment. A little frantic sometimes but always open.

Info about Suzanne's study plan can be found at the top of that page. Take a look at what is required, and you can decide to contact her if you want to participate.

Best of luck to you!

Jo Dirt · Aug 1, 2006

twallum, you aren't the only one to fail the NCLEX, as you will be able to see from the NCLEX discussion forum. I know a woman who took it three times. She was ready to give up, but she didn't.

Success isn't only that you win, it's how many times you were able to pick yourself up when you fell and go at it again.

And that NCLEX, I don't think there is any amount of studying that can prepare you for it. It is more like learning how they want you to answer.

Don't give up. On the BON application I think there were 12 slots for test score results! They know it is s difficult test!

Tweety, BSN, RN · Aug 1, 2006

We're all here to support and encourage one another.

The best way to get ahold of me is by private message. Click my name and then "send a private message........".

I can't answer any questions about Suzanne's program of study however. I do know that it has helped other people who have failed on their first try. Hang in there!

LadyStar42, LPN · Aug 1, 2006

Twallum, first thing you need to do is calm down and give yourself a break. Yes the NCLEX is hard, but it is doable. First you have to have a game plan. Since it's been so long since you graduated, you may need to review the basic stuff to get your brain in the right place. That always helps me.

Don't beat yourself up for failing that test, there are younger, fresher, students who just got out of school yesterday that fail the NCLEX. The good news is, you can keep taking it as long as you have the almighty dollar. There are a couple of boards here devoted solely to the NCLEX.

Good luck and keep us posted ok?

LadyStar

BCzito · Aug 1, 2006

Hey everyone, my name is Marcee. I am new here and just love this site, even though I am having a heck of a time navigating it to get the best use out of it. Anyway, graduated nursing school in 1994, sat for boards knew I would fail and did. Husband died, 2 kids, and I went on a destructive path. 2005-2006 from love and support of friends, once they found out I had a degree in nursing they said you sit for that test again, you did the hardest part. So, took a Kaplan review in November 2005, have dozens of disks with questions and reviews, and a trillion review books, and was tutored for about 2 months, which was disaster due to the inability of the tutor and their time schedule. I have worked hard to get to the point of taking the NCLEX on July 24th 2006, well needless to say I failed. The test was from Pluto and all I did seemed frugal. I am 50, going back to nursing school is not an option at all, I work full time and my nervous system is shot. I felt like I did not deserve to even walk down the sidewalk for this whole week after the test. What that journey and experience did to me mentally, physically and spiritually was cruel and unhealthy. I am lost and confused. I will sit again, even though i do not know why, how do you keep studying, what do you study, the test had nothing to do with anything I painstakingly tried to bring back to that dusty old nursing brain back from 1994. I have bought the Saunders that Suzanne4 suggested, I bought it obsessivley and compulsively in hopes of a miracle. I can re-test in 45 to 90 days. I am sick in my stomach, do not know what to do, do I let it die or is it a reality to get this license. I want this license, I am not worried about a job, I just want that license.
So thanks for listening and please feel free to give me your feedback and support

You can do it, it seems like you have lost a lot of confidence in yourself. You have to keep in mind that you've been through an awful lot recently and its simply not possible sometimes to just forget it all. My dad was 50 when he went to nursing school. Age is not a matter. I definately would use the sauders CD. The CD is excellent because you can see the rationales about why your answer was wrong or right immediately. In addition I would pick up a copy of nursing made insanely easy. it has lots of funny pictures to help you remember key concepts. (some books stores sell them as volume 1 and 2 .. get both!)... when studying it is more important to make sure you understand the rational of why you got a question right or wrong then simply doing the questions and checking them without ever knowing or understanding the rationale. you can do, but it requires intense concentration.... It sounds like you have some anxiety as well, this could definately effect your ability to study and/or take the test. Have you ever considered seeing someone about an antidepressant? This would help with an xiety a great deal. not to mention you have had a lot on your shoulders the last few years. Just cause you go one doesn't mean you'd need to stay on it forever... it might just give you the space you needed to refocus your life again...

just a thought... either way I am sure you can do it. Believe in yourself!

best of luck! dz

CEG · Aug 1, 2006

So your husband died, you took care of your two kids and went on with life and somehow didn't find time to take the NCLEX? Doesn't sound to bad to me!! A lot of people retake it. I still have almost a year until graduation and I am already worried about it:) I would certainly not beat myself up over that. Not to mention that being out of school for a few years is going to make it a little more difficult for you. Give yourself a break! You went to college, got a degree, worked hard for a few years, and now are taking on the enormous task of studying for the NCLEX.

I can also tell you that I am 27 and sometimes I feel old, so it's all relative. 50 is far younger than the oldest person in my class. You're only as old as you think you are, so start thinking of yourself as 20:)

Seriously though, perhaps you are someone who is not used to failing, it is hard to pick yourself back up. But, it's something many people go through (including 20 year olds with no job/kids/responsibility) so don't lose hope!

Cheyenne RN,BSHS · Aug 1, 2006

so thanks for listening and please feel free to give me your feedback and support

stick with it and do not give up. believe in yourself. you have had a lot of stresses in your life and sometimes a licensed professional counselor can help you learn relaxation techniques and provide a support to help you learn how to encourage yourself more.

i am saying this because after the death of my son i thought i was handling everything pretty well but it wasn't until after i saw a lpc that i realized i was undermining my self and basically so emotionally beat down that i was dooming myself to failure before i even started. (sort of the self fulfilling prophecy thing))

whatever you choose, hang in there and don't give up. you made it through nursing school and you can make it through this.

missninaRN · Aug 1, 2006

You are worthy of walking on the sidewalk, and you are worthy of being a nurse.

Please be kind to yourself, don't beat yourself up over this any more.

Take care of yourself, okay?

nursemike, ASN, RN · Aug 1, 2006

Hi, Marcee. Welcome. I agree with the others--failing NCLEX is a set-back, but only a set-back. A friend of mine, a very good nurse, took it six times. Worst case of test anxiety I've ever seen, but a lot of people need 2-3 tries. It's the hardest test I've ever taken, and I was once a physics major.

Age is not your enemy. I passed at 48, and I'm not noticeably more senile at 50. You have been out of school awhile, though. I think it would do a lot of good if you could arrange a refresher course through a local community college. One of my classmates was re-entering the field after a long hiatus to raise a family and stuff, and she basically re-did the whole program, minus clinicals and some of the support classes. It sounds like you may not have time for that, but I'd recommend looking around to see if there was anything that could fit your schedule. Or you could just buy some recent nursing textbooks and study them on your own time. Med-Surg, Pharm, and a review of anatomy would seem like a good place to start.

My program used Kaplan's as its NCLEX review. They had a 4-day seminar we all had to attend. It was decent. The emphasis seemed more on how to read the questions in the new format, but I would imagine the new format would be pretty tricky, if you were used to the old one. Most of our classroom tests were modeled on NCLEX, so we were kind of used to it by the time we graduated, but practice questions do help.

You might try some nursing journals as a way to get current, too. The ones I've seem have CE courses in them. At the moment, I get all the CE I need at work, but doing them "for fun" should be good practice.