Published
I'm sure we all have stories about patients requesting their "epidermal" and the likes of that, let's share some here. Now, while I never encourage laughing at or making fun of patients, this is a safe place among other nurses where we can find the comic value in some of these comments. I'll actually start us off by sharing a funny story about one of our OB doctors.
I had a patient with intact membranes that was having some very deep variables, she came in and saw the strip and said "Let's go break her water so we can put in an IUPC and amnioinfuse." I think as soon as she said it she wanted to take it back because she realized how stupid it sounded but it sure gave us all a laugh for the day.
I was walking back from lunch break, just passing the OR suite, when a man approached me and asked if his wife's 'circumcision' was over.
Several pts/SO/family members wonder how the baby will come out if the foley cath is inserted. I guess many people don't realize there are more than one opening.
The clincher: a first time dad-to-be (totally serious) asked why it was that pregnant ladies have such "huge turds". He went on to describe the size and consistency of his wife's bowel movements. I had a really hard time keeping a straight face.
Love this post, it's keeping me awake in my quiet AP rotation.
Alison, RN L&D
I had a patient tell me she was having contraptions in her eucharist. As I knew she was a Catholic and that she was trying very hard to get it, I was able to walk out before I laughed. This was 15 years ago and I still remember it. After she had her baby, I helped her learn the words correctly. She was very receptive and very interested and I made sure to be very not teasing.
But I've always remembered it and when I hang up from a triage call and a nurse asks me what's up, I usually say "she has contraptions in her eucharist!". May the Catholic God forgive me!
hmm ok"can you tie my tubes for me?" "sure ill have the doctor talk to you about it" "no can you just do it?" "no thats surgery and you need a doctor for surgery" "no cant you just stick your fingers up there and do it?" (deep breath and pushed back a laugh) "no it has to be done in an operating room and they do it threw your belly" "oh , well my brother in law did it for me last time but they came untied. thats why i got pregnent" - yeah I wasnt gunna ask about that.
:omy:...WHAT!
Several pts/SO/family members wonder how the baby will come out if the foley cath is inserted. I guess many people don't realize there are more than one opening.
Alison, RN L&D
I could not convince my old roommate that they were separate openings! She said she was sure hers were all the same hole. :rofl The funny thing is, I heard that she's a nurse now. Hopefully she's got it all straight now!
Elvish, BSN, DNP, RN, NP
4 Articles; 5,259 Posts
The first time I heard that it kinda flipped me out, though! It is a rather unique sound.