Nursing school freakout

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Hi Everyone,

This will be my first post as I have been kind of stalking the forums since I applied to nursing school, and didn't even sign up until I was accepted. Here is my story...

I am a 34 year old mother of four, who returned to school after managing retail stores; I have much life experience, as I was a teenage mother to an autistic child. I am married for a second time, but spent much of the last 15 years as a single parent. I returned to school in 2009, determined to show my children that anything was possible and that the road I took was much harder than if they just pursued college after high school. Although, I never graduated high school, my children are well on their way to accomplishing this goal for themselves. I couldn't be a more proud momma, they are great kids and I got really lucky.

I applied for the nursing program at ASU in February 2014 for the fall 2014 cohort. My GPA was a 3.71, but my TEAS score was not so hot, I do not do so well at standardized tests. So combined I had an advancement score of 1.6405 out of 2. My advisor told me not to sweat the TEAS again, and that I would get accepted into the program. Fast-forward to March 2014, acceptance letters are being emailed, I am sitting in one of my last prereq classes, you can see multiple students shining from their happy news and a few who looked bummed. My heart sank as one of my close friends showed me her denial letter. Do I really want to open this email here? I take the plunge....denied, not even wait listed. I drove home feeling defeated and like I had completely failed.

I decided that I would of course try again for spring, I am not a quitter and I truly want to be an RN. I had saved some tuition money with the help of my loving husband. Like I said before, I have been at this since 2009, so my financial aid has dwindled and I knew that I would be on my own for paying for the remainder of school. After being denied for fall, I decided to take a semester off and spent the tuition money on debt that we currently had. Exactly one week to the day of paying this debt, (payment already processed) ASU calls me and says, "There is a spot for you if you would like it." Not only that, it was at my first choice, the VA cohort. Of course I accepted...I mean I can work out the financial aspects, and this is my dream.

So my whirlwind began or what felt like it for a minute, high on the fact that I had been accepted for whatever the reason, and then... I started to panic inside. What if I fail, I mean I wasn't good enough to get in the first time around; heck I wasn't even good enough for the wait list. What if I get to my clinical and end up hurting someone, what if I get through nursing school and start working and my inexperience hurts or worse yet kills someone. My self-doubt has kicked in big time and I am trying to put on a brave face for everyone around me, but inside I am scared to death. Am I alone, is it because of my age, is it because I was originally denied acceptance, I don't know but for whatever reason I do not feel like I am good/smart/young or whatever (I don't think I have actually identified my cause of anxiety) enough to be successful. I am a strong, stubborn, and independent personality and I am so not used to these kinds of feelings of insecurity.

My classes start in 10 days; PLEASE tell me there are other people out there who are or were as scared and anxious as I am. Any words of wisdom about nursing school and what I can expect would also be helpful....maybe I just needed to get this out there. Thanks for reading my rant.

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It will work out. Obviously you want it bad enough to find a way to make it work. What helps for me is to just look at one semester at a time. If I think to far out my anxiety flares.

I'm a mom to two special needs boys. I'm 32. Dropped out of high school at 16. I got my GED four short years ago and since have become a high honors student. I've been accepted into two different nursing programs one ADN, one BSN.

You can do this :) and great job on setting a good example for your kids!

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Thank you so much for your kind words, I think I just needed to get it all out. Everyone is so happy for me, that I hate to complain and tell them how I am freaking out inside. I know it is a long road, and I think I will do exactly as you suggested one semester at a time. Thanks again!

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And what if....you are a rock star at it?? :)

Go for it and don't look back. You can do this!

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You're welcome!! :D

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I think the freak outs are completely normal. We all have what ifs when it comes to such big life changes...you are not alone. Get it all out, then get back on a positive-thinking track. Good luck, I am sure you will do great!

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Thank you...I really hope that I am someday! :yes:

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Thank you

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Specializes in Pediatric OR.

I'm freaking out too!!!! I think and hope it's all normal feelings... But seriously though.... I'M ABSOLUTELY FREAKING OUT!!!!!!

You shouldn't be thinking about getting denied and than accepted.. Be happy and proud... You made it!!!! Just know the competition was tough... But you're there and will kick butt at it. You have worked so very hard to get to where you are. Great job and good luck to you! ????

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Specializes in Neuroscience.

You have more reasons to succeed than to fail. You will be fine. You will accomplish your goals and you will not only be successful but amazing.

We talk up nursing school like it's the most terrible thing. If you have the mentality and the intelligence, you will succeed. I think you've got this. Don't let your fears hold you back.

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I think everyone has had some point where they were nervous and/or scared about what the future held. I myself have had cases of the what ifs regarding failure. The thing is you did get into nursing school and that was no accident; allow yourself time to revel in your success at that before jumping to conclusions. Prestigious colleges all over the world turn down or wait list applicants. Thousands of people including myself have been denied or wait listed not because they were not qualified or couldn't hack it, but because there were too many people to accommodate. Even after being denied spots in my top 2 programs I still ended up going and passed with flying colors. The only thing you can realistically do is do your best and take everything one day at a time. If you do fail something then you deal with that scenario when you come to it and not before.

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I think what you are feeling is perfectly normal. I am a 40 year old, wife and mother of 3, level 2 nursing student and I was extremely nervous going in, partly because I kept reading how difficult nursing school was. Trust me, when you get to class on that first day, you will find a room full of people having the same thoughts as you are. Everyone will be nervous because you don't know what to expect, but you will find your groove and be just fine. The key is finding what works for you and going with that. Everyone has their methods of how to make it through nursing school. You get all kinds of advice from read every word to forget about your social life until you're done. The truth is, for me, neither of these worked. I learned that it was impossible for ME to read every word, but let the Powerpoints direct my reading and then research further if there were holes or I had further questions. I also had a social life. I drank wine on weekends with my sister and friends, I hung out with my husband and children, but when it was time to get back to the books, I did just that. So basically, don't be afraid of what is to come, embrace it, go in with the idea that you will succeed and give it your best shot.

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