Thinking about become a (male) Nurse, parents disapprove

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Hello fellow Canadians,

I will try my best to keep this as short as possible. Basically, I am a University student in Canada, having just started the first semester of my second year. I am 19 years old, almost 20. I am also a male. Back in High School, I wanted to be a doctor, but after conversing with a few family physicians that I was close to, I was put off of the path and applied to University as an Anthropology major, which also interested me. My parents were not very happy, and before Uni had even started, got me to drop Anthro and enter in the Sciences.

I did Sciences for my entire first year and decided that I would probably become a Pharmacist, since I was good at calculus and chemistry. My parents, once again, disapproved because it was now "too late" for me to be a Pharmacist, my entire first year would go to waste, and not only that, they wanted me to switch out of sciences (since apparently you can't get a job with a science major) and here I am now, second year of Uni, doing Accountant.

It has been just over a month since the start of the semester and I already hate it. I really can't see myself going down this route any longer, Accounting is not for me, I don't want to be at a desk all day crunching numbers, doing someone else's taxes. I was enrolled in 5 classes this semester, I dropped 2 (Accounting + Computer Business Systems) since I was not doing good in them, kept the other 3 I was doing good in (Business Math, macroeconomics, microeconomics), in secret, my parents don't know.

I was surfing YouTube a few days ago and came across a couple of videos by male nurses. I watched them, heard what they had to say about the job description, and honestly, I liked it a lot. I have always wanted to do something where I'd be able to help people (hence originally wanting to be a doctor), but was put off by the high-debt and time-consumption of med school. Nursing seems like a much better option, less time in school, plus there is more interaction with patients, which I like.

I brought it up with my mom today and she flipped. She gave me the whole lecture about how I was bringing shame on my family and how wrong it was. I come from a Punjabi family, Punjabi culture is very conservative, men aren't supposed to be nurses. Women are nurses + teachers, men are doctors/lawyers/engineers/businessmen etc... That is one reason she disapproves. Another is that she thinks it is a really dirty job, all about picking up other people's poop, she told me she wouldn't let me in the house if I did that, she would be too grossed out. I know it is a part of the job and wouldn't mind doing it for a patient who needed the help, but she is not accepting. And the final reason, she told me if I try to become a nurse, I have just wasted 2 years of Uni and that it was all for nothing. I am about 5,000 dollars in debt as of right now, she says it will all have been a waste of money. And I haven't even talked about it with my dad yet, he will likely react even worse.

Anyone else from a similar conservative background where the parents disapproved of their son becoming a nurse? How did you convince them?

Also, how does one go about becoming a nurse in Canada? Are there any (course) requirements you have to fulfill before going to nursing school? And once in nursing school, can you start working after 2 years (under supervision)? 4 years to be a RN, right?

Thank you guys :)

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Specializes in Pediatric/Adolescent, Med-Surg.

Wow, sorry to hear that you are going through all this. It sucks that your family is not being more supportive. You say you have only been thinking about being a nurse for a couple days, are you sure this is what you want to do? Are you paying for your college or are your parents? If you are paying yourself, then getting your parents on board isn't as important.

I am not familiar with a situation where nursing students can start working at 2 years with supervision. Unless you are doing an American 2 year RN program, the only jobs I see you being able to do would be nursing assistant or getting a internship in a hospital

Good luck with your decision

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Specializes in Acute Care, Rehab, Palliative.

I am sorry to hear about your dilemma. I am sure it will be difficult for many of us to relate but I realize that given your background family influence is very strong.I work with a few male nurses and they are a valuable asset in the workplace.I encourage you to follow the path of your own choosing.You are legally an adult and as so it really up to you which profession you pursue.I wouldn't consider the schooling you have completed as a waste of time.

If you do decide that nursing is for you, you have a few options.You could go to college and and take a 2 year Practical Nursing program or you could go to university and do a 4 year BSN. There are also BSN programs that are collaborative between a college and a university and there are bridging programs you can take if you are a PN and want to get your BSN.Both proggrams will have prerequisites. You may have some completed already such as calculus and chemistry.

Best of luck and let us know how it goes.

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Sorry to hear, but i know of situations very similar to yours and males from the same culture wanting to be a nurse. It would be tough to make a switch for sure, but if you know that is right for

You ignore what everyone says and follow your passion. There are many 2 year accelerated RN

Programs in canada: ubc, u of t and a few other in toronto, they require you to have some university or sometimes a full degree. explain to them its not all about picking up poop: u can later on get a masters and be a NP and prescribe meds it is a very important role, you can specialize as an oncology nurse, OR nurse etc. Dont be disappointed, i personally know many male punjabi nurses and after a while the family sees it is a highly respected position, they will hopefully turn around and be more accepting. good luck :)

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My parents are just as conservative, if not more than yours. The way I see it's my career and although they do have an input at the end of the day it's my career. I started out doing a degree in microbiology and I hated intensely but I mainly stuck with it because of my parents and ignorance to other career options. As I matured through university I noticed that people were ACTUALLY happy with what they were studying and I decided to leave the program. Fast forward to today and I'm a second year (male) nursing student at a university in Edmonton and I'm thoroughly enjoying it and not hating every moment of my life.

Many people including the public are ignorant to the role of a nurse. I think educating your mother on what a nurse does is probably the first step. Yes, we clean BM from time to time, but the job entails so much more than that. We're are responsible for caring for the sick, injured and dying persons and that comes with huge responsibility.

At the end of the day it's your life, not your parents. If nursing is what you want to do research the job duties and go for it.

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Specializes in Cardiology.

It's all fine and dandy to pursue nursing if that is your passion and dream. However, you have to ask yourself.. what do you really want to do?

Watching a YouTube vid is great and I'm happy it peaked your interest but I would seriously recommend you look into volunteering in a health care setting first to see if you REALLY want to pursue a career in nursing.

I would also recommend you speak with some nursing faculty at your Uni and perhaps they can put you in touch with some practice instructors and you could shadow them on a clinical day.

Whatever you do, just don't make a huge decision like this based something you watched on the internet. Do some research, talk to lots of people who work in different settings. Use your Uni's Faculty of Nursing as a resource and finally, go for the Bachelor of Nursing. Getting a practical nurse diploma is a waste of your time.

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Thank you for the advice everyone, I really appreciate it! :)

@ChristineN, my parents pay for some of my schooling through RESP, but most of the money comes through student loans provided by the BC government.

Also, I know how big of a decision this is and am not planning on getting myself into anything without doing the proper research beforehand. Before applying to any Nursing Schools, I plan on shadowing and conversing with Nurses at my city's hospital to make sure it is really something I would be happy doing. I have not made any concrete decisions as of yet, I am just disappointed at my parents' reaction to the suggestion that I may enter Nursing.

@Novo, exactly! I hated having to go to my accounting class, it was making me unhappy and it got to the point where I dropped it because I knew it wasn't the right fit for me. I have not yet told my parents and have no idea how I will break it to them I am glad you have found a path that you enjoy following, hopefully things work out for me and I will get to do something I enjoy as well :)

You guys mentioned 2-year accelerated programs, if I go into that, is it 6-straight semesters (without summer off)? Also, if I go down that route, will I get to be RN or would it require me to work under supervision?

I am a BC student and currently attend Kwantlen Polytechnic University. There is a 4-year Bachelor's of Nursing program, the details are here: KPU 2013-14 University Calendar | Nursing: Bachelor of Science in Nursing

The thing is, I didn't really plan on staying in BC after this year, I wanted to move to Montreal and do schooling over there. McGill is the only English-speaking University in the city which offers Nursing programs.

There are, however, a few English-speaking colleges that allow students to take Nursing. Here is an example: CEGEP John Abbott College Montreal -- 180.A0 Nursing

I hear that the system works a bit differently in Quebec, could any please enlighten me as to whether or not my prospects of finding a Nursing job outside of Quebec will be hindered if I do my schooling within the province? In other words, will I be unqualified to work at a hospital in BC or Ontario or Alberta if I get my degree from a Quebec college?

Thank you once again everyone!

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Specializes in Acute Care, Rehab, Palliative.

Accelerated BSN programs are for people that have a previous Bachelors degree in another field.

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I realize it is cultural for you to do as your parents wish, however, you are an adult and if you want to be a nurse, go for it! I'm not sure about everywhere in Canada, but in BC an RN program is a four-year BSN degree program and there are some pre-requisite courses, usually including an English course or two. Some of your sciences you have done may qualify even. The best thing to do is make an appointment with an advisor at the most likely school you may attend and discuss it. Remember, you don't have to even let your parents know about this because you are an adult, and the advisor at the school won't require their knowledge or presence either.

Whatever you do, I wish you good luck!

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Oh I forgot, yes in some places there is a program for ESN or "employed student nurses" I believe beginning after the second year of the program.

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Specializes in Acute Care, Rehab, Palliative.
Oh I forgot, yes in some places there is a program for ESN or "employed student nurses" I believe beginning after the second year of the program.

Not in Canada.

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Not in Canada.

Yes. In Canada. In BC they do, and I know this because I am an RN in BC.

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