We had this huge discussion at work today, and i thought i'd get your opinions.
The statement was this: "We have to many people becoming nurses for the money. Its not like it used to be, where a nurse chose to be a nurse because they liked helping people. Its all about the money,."
We were talking about the increased patient complaints, and an older nurse stated the above and thats the reason for increased patient complaints.
Just WHO spends "half their life" at their career? CERTAINLY not me. My life is at HOME not work.
Yes, I'm a wife (14 years today) and a mother (2 beautiful daughters - 12 and 3), but working IS my life. I plan to work to well past retirement age (whenever that is) - probably totaling 2/3+ of my life. I learned several years ago if I'm not working in my chosen career (medicine of some sort), I'm not happy. I love my family to death, but most of my identity is defined by my career. It's something dh and I accepted a long time ago. Yes, I still make time to attend my family's activites and to spend with them.
I hope this makes sense. It's alot easier to explain in person.
If you're upset with me, I'm sorry, I meant no offense to anybody. I don't really care why people choose nursing, as long as they do their jobs well. I was just saying, that if I were looking only for money, I wouldn't choose nursing for myself. I guess I'm just not explaining myself well enough. I think it's just too much work/stress if you don't like the caring aspect of the job. The paycheck isn't enough to keep me going back. I think most of us (myself included) have stated that a secure job market and decent pay scale were one of the reasons we chose nursing.
pricklypear - Let me start off by apologizing. I'm not usually so quick to jump to conclusions but some of these more judgemental posts, coming from people who claim to corner the market on caring and compassion, really got under my skin. I'm sorry.
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
Yes, I'm a wife (14 years today) and a mother (2 beautiful daughters - 12 and 3), but working IS my life. I plan to work to well past retirement age (whenever that is) - probably totaling 2/3+ of my life. I learned several years ago if I'm not working in my chosen career (medicine of some sort), I'm not happy. I love my family to death, but most of my identity is defined by my career. It's something dh and I accepted a long time ago. Yes, I still make time to attend my family's activites and to spend with them.
I hope this makes sense. It's alot easier to explain in person.
I am sorry if I somehow insulted you; I honestly don't mean that.
But working is NOT my life. I built a life that includes work. I cut back hours and pay (and goodies) to make my homelife MORE a priority and to raise my kids before they are gone and I wondered what happened to the years I worked and was not home. Certainly, my choices would not work for everyone else and I would not ever assume that. But, It has taken years of work on myself and my life to get there. IMO, to make work one's life is a huge mistake to me. It's to whittle life away sadly while the fun passes you by. I have 16 1/2 happy years' marriage to a terrific guy---- and two kids ----my family and marriage are A-NUMBER-ONE in my life and I intend to keep them there.
It took lots of counseling and self-work to get me where I am today and I am still a work-in-progress, no doubt. I used to think nursing would cure my demons from a very troubled and abused childhood. Big mistake. I had to put my career in its rightful place, and that is a distant number 3. I wont' get far, I know, lacking such ambition, but then I am happy where I am. (ob nurse).
Now by my prior comment, I was referring to a comment some time back that eluded to the belief that -----"since we spend half our life at work, the reason we became nurses need be because we are altruistic and care, not for money!". That is a paraphrase, not exact quote. What I am driving at, is, most of have very busy, productive lives OUTSIDE work. Nursing does NOT define me and never will. I define myself in a multifaceted way that includes nursing in my complicated fabric. It's my job, my profession, but certainly NOT my life. I hope that makes sense.
I mean you no disrespect. OH and HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO YOU and YOUR HUSBAND!!!!! :balloons:
I am sorry if I somehow insulted you; I honestly don't mean that.
But working is NOT my life. I built a life that includes work. I cut back hours and pay (and goodies) to make my homelife MORE a priority and to raise my kids before they are gone and I wondered what happened to the years I worked and was not home. Certainly, my choices would not work for everyone else and I would not ever assume that. But, It has taken years of work on myself and my life to get there. IMO, to make work one's life is a huge mistake to me. It's to whittle life away sadly while the fun passes you by. I have 16 1/2 happy years' marriage and two kids that are A-NUMBER-ONE in my life and I intend to keep them there.
It took lots of counseling and self-work to get me where I am today and I am still a work-in-progress, no doubt. I used to think nursing would cure my demons from a very troubled and abused childhood. Big mistake. I had to put my career in its rightful place, and that is a distant number 3. I wont' get far, I know, lacking such ambition, but then I am happy where I am. (ob nurse).
Now by my prior comment, I was referring to a comment some time back that eluded to the belief that -----"since we spend half our life at work, the reason we became nurses need be because we are altruistic and care, not for money!". That is a paraphrase, not exact quote. What I am driving at, is, most of have very busy, productive lives OUTSIDE work. Nursing does NOT define me and never will. I define myself in a multifaceted way that includes nursing in my complicated fabric. It's my job, my profession, but certainly NOT my life. I hope that makes sense.
I mean you no disrespect. OH and HAPPY ANNIVERSARY TO YOU and YOUR HUSBAND!!!!! :balloons:
Ditto SmilingBluEyes! I'm not a nurse YET but I am a wife, mother, and woman. Those roles are the most important ones I will ever have. Becoming a nurse is icing on the cake. The cake(home life) is really good but the icing(nursing) makes it a bit sweeter.
Specializes in Specializes in L/D, newborn, GYN, LTC, Dialysis.
Ditto SmilingBluEyes! I'm not a nurse YET but I am a wife, mother, and woman. Those roles are the most important ones I will ever have. Becoming a nurse is icing on the cake. The cake(home life) is really good but the icing(nursing) makes it a bit sweeter.
Keep that perspective. I have learned not to depend too much on a lot of money ( I have potential to make much more than I do). THe more I make, the more I tend to want to spend----it's a funny thing. I can be greedy at times, and have to remind myself of the costs beyond revenue.
It's important to me to keep that balance in check at all times. Not easy, certainly, but very important.
I guess everyone is different, but nursing is my vocation. It allows me to be paid and do good in the world simultaneously. I find it hard to imagine it being the main source of my identity as a human being.
So, hear I was, thinking this thread was about played out and I didn't have much to add...silly me!
I am someone who has always felt that my work was an important part of my identity. Not the whole of it, by any means. One of the things that has attracted me to nursing is the possibility of working 3x12 and having lots of time for other interests. I seriously doubt I'll be someone who picks up a lot of on-call time. But a lot of my self-worth is based on my work; I want my work to be meaningful, and I need to do it well.
For me, this was no less true when I was a carpenter than it will be as a nurse. I wasn't in it "just for the money." Most of the time, I didn't really make much money. Some of that was just the ups and downs of a seasonal and unpredictable business, some was because I sometimes took jobs that were interesting instead of boring ones that paid better. Being a carpenter was more than "just a job" to me, but that didn't mean I couldn't drive past a dilapidated house without stopping to fix it, or that if I met someone at a party who needed a door planed down, I had to do it for free. I wasn't a carpenter 24/7, and I don't plan to be a 24/7 nurse, either.
On the other hand, as a carpenter I couldn't tolerate shoddy work. Anytime I nailed two boards together, I had to do it right. If I built myself a sawhorse, it had to be a solid, well-built sawhorse. If I chose to do a job, even if I was doing it for free, I had to do it as well as I could. Even now, when I'm a nurse, I'm still a carpenter. I can't be happy building crap, so if I can't build it right, I won't build it at all.
And that, to me, is all I think it should mean to be a nurse.
On the job, I'll give people the best care I can, but I'm not going to take them home with me. I may well think about a particular problem after work. I may well say a prayer for a patient I feel needs it. But I'm not going to be miserable every time a patient gets bad news or isn't doing well, and I'm not going to encourage acquaintances to use me to avoid seeing their physician. Heck--the best advice often is "see your physician." On the other hand, if I do give care away from the job, I'm certainly not going to accept a lesser standard, so in that sense I suppose I am a nurse 24/7. Then, too, while I wasn't one to get in barfights as a carpenter, I feel a moral imperative to avoid that sort of thing as a nurse. We didn't actually recite the Nightengale oath in school, but I feel bound by its principles. I can't be a nurse and willfully hurt people, even if they deserve it.
On the other hand, if I feel an overwhelming urge to be a lawyer, 10 years from now, I'm not going to feel like I'm breaking a pledge to God by following it.
Which is all, I suppose, just a long-winded way of repeating, it isn't an all or nothing deal. You can be a caring professional and still have a life. Frankly, I think one is more apt to be effective if one does have a life away from nursing. Nor do I think it's mercenary to be interested in making a decent living. It's hard to be giving when you're in dire need, yourself. I would hope any nurse who would care for me was happy and well-paid.
Specializes in Telemetry, ICU, Resource Pool, Dialysis.
On the job, I'll give people the best care I can, but I'm not going to take them home with me.
I must be sick...I have had patients I wanted to take home with me!!! Seriously! Bringing home another cat that I found is one thing, but geeze, what would my family say if I brought home a patient?? I am proud of the restraint I have shown so far.
But seriously Mike, what an awesome way to express yourself.:yelclap: So eloquent!
I must be sick...I have had patients I wanted to take home with me!!! Seriously! Bringing home another cat that I found is one thing, but geeze, what would my family say if I brought home a patient?? I am proud of the restraint I have shown so far.
I commend you, prickly. You are a role model for us all!!!
Being a teacher sounds like a prescription for a nervous breakdown to me. I just couldn't stand the impertinant, noisy heathens one bit! And then, having to deal with their parents (and their parents' lawyers), whose little darlings would never do a thing wrong, well it would drive me to drink!:angryfire
RoxanRN
388 Posts
I hope this makes sense. It's alot easier to explain in person.