Is it okay for RN to ask recovery patients not to swear?

RNperdiem, RN · May 15, 2016

I work with people who have had major trauma and some very painful surgeries. Under some circumstances, strong language is warranted. If a nurse turns someone with rib fractures, pelvic fractures and both femurs fractured, then cursing is understandable under the circumstances.

As long as the patient is not gettting too personal with the bad language (my name is RN per diem not xxxxx), then I am fine.

SweetieBeeSandy · May 15, 2016

Thank you so much for reading my post, and taking time to reply. I read all the comments many times. Each comment left me something. Some lead me to reflex and think, some shared experiences in a field that I've never been before, some made me smile, and some gave me an encouragement. I am happy that I had a place to ask a question, and am very grateful that so many people gave me a helping hand. I'm very sorry that I cannot reply to each comment.

Yes, I have heard people swear before, but truthfully not very often. I don't recall hearing profanity at home, the one I grew up in or the one of my own. And this male patient was probably the third, maybe the fourth one that I heard swearing in recovery room since I started working here 7 years ago. The previous patients were, just as someone said from his/her experience, said it once and apologized a few seconds later. So this patient was my first that kept swearing every 10 seconds, and this was the first time that I requested to stop swearing.

His pain was very severe, and I maxed out with pain medication and asked the anesthesia team for help. By the time he felt better we had given him more than 4mg Dilaudid and 250 mcg Fentanyl and Ofirmev, taking as long as one hour before he was able to drift off to sleep.

It was very inspiring to know about the study that shows that swearing reduce stress or pain. That helps me find an answer to what I was wondering. It reminded me of when I had a hip surgery due to a congenital issue, or when I had hydronephrosis due to kidney stone, both in my 20's. I was in an intense pain that I could barely breathe. I became tearful and had no control. If someone asked me not to, it would've been very difficult if I tried. And with the study I see that swearing is a way that people cope with some form of crisis, just as crying is what I do to deal with it when I'm very emotional or stressed.

Then I must say that it was unprofessional that I asked him to stop swearing. Of course if he couldn't, there wouldn't have been any way for anyone to "make" him stop. But he should've been able to say what he needed to say.

Some people mentioned my ability of handling anything when I had a hard time handling profanity. Yes, it has been 15 years since I started working as an RN but I still learn something new everyday. I am probably not a great nurse who can handle things well as suspected here, but I'm trying to be better with any help that I can have. Some come from people that I know, some come from people that I can only meet in the cyberspace.

Thank you so much again for all your comments to help me be better. I think I can start a great new week. Hope this will be another great one for you as well.

CapeCodMermaid, RN · May 15, 2016

I do not usually drop the f bomb. However, I recently fractured a bone and had diverticulitis. I was in sheer agony...far worse than child birth. I warned the nurses before they moved me or tried to start an IV for the 5th time, that I might have to say the F word over and over...I read the same study about swearing reducing pain. None of them cared what I said.

And as many others have said, people react differently to anesthesia. If he wasn't swearing AT you, you might want to ignore him.

CelticGoddess, BSN, RN · May 15, 2016

erm, but what if they've interrupted your game of Candy Crush

Well heck, you go in and swear back at 'em. They need to learn priorities.

BellionRN · May 15, 2016

I haven't asked them NOT to, unless it's at me ... but I have on occasion reminded them that they're not the only one in the room & perhaps could they not scream ALL OF THE swear words as I'm doing everything I can do to manage their pain.

I've been known to drop f-bombs like nobody's business so I don't hold it against them.

BuckyBadgerRN, ASN, RN · May 16, 2016

Unless he were cursing AT me or disturbing other patients, I'd ignore it.

Elvish, BSN, DNP, RN, NP · May 16, 2016

Unless a patient is cursing at me or in front of small children I'd let it go.

If the worst thing about your shift is a patient swearing coming out of anesthesia it's not a bad shift to be honest.

Anonymous865 · May 16, 2016

This is a very gracious, thoughtful response SweetieBeeSandy.

Thank you so much for reading my post, and taking time to reply. I read all the comments many times. Each comment left me something. Some lead me to reflex and think, some shared experiences in a field that I've never been before, some made me smile, and some gave me an encouragement. I am happy that I had a place to ask a question, and am very grateful that so many people gave me a helping hand. I'm very sorry that I cannot reply to each comment.
Yes, I have heard people swear before, but truthfully not very often. I don't recall hearing profanity at home, the one I grew up in or the one of my own. And this male patient was probably the third, maybe the fourth one that I heard swearing in recovery room since I started working here 7 years ago. The previous patients were, just as someone said from his/her experience, said it once and apologized a few seconds later. So this patient was my first that kept swearing every 10 seconds, and this was the first time that I requested to stop swearing.
His pain was very severe, and I maxed out with pain medication and asked the anesthesia team for help. By the time he felt better we had given him more than 4mg Dilaudid and 250 mcg Fentanyl and Ofirmev, taking as long as one hour before he was able to drift off to sleep.
It was very inspiring to know about the study that shows that swearing reduce stress or pain. That helps me find an answer to what I was wondering. It reminded me of when I had a hip surgery due to a congenital issue, or when I had hydronephrosis due to kidney stone, both in my 20's. I was in an intense pain that I could barely breathe. I became tearful and had no control. If someone asked me not to, it would've been very difficult if I tried. And with the study I see that swearing is a way that people cope with some form of crisis, just as crying is what I do to deal with it when I'm very emotional or stressed.
Then I must say that it was unprofessional that I asked him to stop swearing. Of course if he couldn't, there wouldn't have been any way for anyone to "make" him stop. But he should've been able to say what he needed to say.
Some people mentioned my ability of handling anything when I had a hard time handling profanity. Yes, it has been 15 years since I started working as an RN but I still learn something new everyday. I am probably not a great nurse who can handle things well as suspected here, but I'm trying to be better with any help that I can have. Some come from people that I know, some come from people that I can only meet in the cyberspace.
Thank you so much again for all your comments to help me be better. I think I can start a great new week. Hope this will be another great one for you as well.

purplegal · May 16, 2016

At first, when I read the title, I thought this was going to be a thread on whether or not you can stop a patient from being verbally abusive, which sometimes swearing can be. Then, I read your post, and realized it was about a patient who was swearing because he was in pain, and not at you. I have mixed opinions on this. On one hand, he wasn't swearing at you, he just needed to let off some steam because he was in so much pain. On the other hand, I don't think it was necessarily unprofessional of you to ask, and to me, doesn't suggest that you lack empathy, as other posters have said. You asked very politely, and it was well received by the patient. For you, swearing is disruptive and can be disrespectful. At the same time, I probably would have let this one go. It doesn't seem like he was bothering other patients, or that he was being disrespectful to you. But, we are two different people, and how you handled it was certainly not wrong. Like others have said, do give some consideration as to what the patient has been through and is going through, and why he may be the way he is--but you are not a bad, uncaring nurse because of it.

NursingNerd1 · May 16, 2016

I, personally, rarely swear, so I would prefer it if my patients don't swear at me or use truly obscene language... But, I understand, also, that when people are in pain, they don't always think before they speak. So, unless they're just being a jerk about it, I let it go. If they're being a jerk... Well, I ask nicely for them to chill with it, but ultimately... I can't control what comes out of their mouth. :speechless:

Daisy_08, BSN, RN · May 16, 2016

He was swearing in context. but if your uncomfortable I think you have a right to ask, but he also has a right not to comply.

I was surprised how nice he was about it. Pt called me a fat B***h, I told pt that was not appropriate, pt then called me a C***. This variation has happened many times.

Maevish, ASN, RN · May 16, 2016

Hi, I am an RN working in PACU. The other day, I received a male patient from OR, and as soon as he woke up from anesthesia he started complaining excruciating pain. Of course that's not unusual. But this man was constantly swearing. "Oh, G--D----- it hurts. Oh F--- it, Oh it F---ing hurts". While I was medicating him as much as possible he kept swearing so much to the point where I had to ask him to stop. "I understand you're in so much pain and I am doing everything I can for you to lower the pain. But it's very difficult to be here and hear you swear. I do not want to hear any more of swearing words". He heard me, and he tried so hard to hold it. "Oh f,fff, it hurts, ohhh fff... so painful!". After an hour medication kicked in and the pain became much better, and he started smiling. And before sending him to a unit, I said I appreciated that he stopped swearing.
Now I wonder, was what I did, asking a patient to stop swearing reasonable? Or is it unprofessional? I always thought it's okay for patients to cry and scream if they had to, because they're in so much pain, and I don't tell them not to. And while I do not use swearing words myself, I know there are people who use them on a regular basis. Then, he should've been allowed to say what he normally say considering it was not personal? Or do I have a right to refuse to hear dirty language(which I thought I did)?
Please let me know what you think.

You definitely CAN ask all you want, however, it usually does no good. You really don't have the "right" to not hear bad language. Our job is taking care of patients at their worst and sometimes bad behavior and language comes along with that. He wasn't saying them at you and he was in a lot of pain.

What would you do with someone withdrawing from ETOH or narcotics? Or someone who uses those words regularly (but again, not at you)? The way I see it, I'm not there to monitor their language, I'm in PACU to get them recovered and pack them off to another unit.

I might say something if they were being recovered next to someone I knew was a very religious person or a child, but even then, that's not the priority at that time. Personally, I'd rather have someone cursing in a medium voice than someone screaming and scaring other patients/families, but that's just me :rolleyes:

I'm more surprised that he toned it down after you asked, which usually doesn't happen.

xo