New nurse needs objective advice

BetsyBeans · Sep 29, 2009

What about having your doctor put you on disability? Is that an option???

PostOpPrincess, BSN, RN · Sep 29, 2009

If people are already irritated with you, I am sure you are not doing a good job of preventing that impression. You are probably right on the mark.

Here's my take. You are a new nurse. You are pregnant. You don't like night shift.

If it isn't for you, leave. YOU WILL burn bridges. How can you not?

How? Well....you already said they are irritated with you.

Night shift isn't for everyone, but you are new. What were your expectations? The timing seems to be off, but you know the pregnancy is more important.

You are making it based on some emotional things that are happening at this time, you may regret just turning in your resignation. Give it time and think clearly; if you are so sure you will leave, just remember that positions and life isn't perfect and you, being so new, may not get that day shift right away.

EmergencyNrse · Sep 29, 2009

If people are already irritated with you, I am sure you are not doing a good job of preventing that impression. You are probably right on the mark.
...but you know the pregnancy is more important.

+1. There are plenty of jobs. Take care of your health and family 1st.

There are other things you can do that aren't as stressful and less demanding.

Come back after delivery and you are more settled.

cherick22 · Sep 29, 2009

I would start with your Doctor...see if you can go on medical leave. You might not be able to because you've only been there two months but this will get the ball rolling. It goes without saying that priority is the baby you are carrying. Honestly I dont know how you have hung in there so long. I was doing nights, not pregnant, children grown up and it was torture. As far as burning bridges dont assume this will happen. Its all in "how" you leave that determines the lasting impression that employer has of you. Get your Docs advice, then speak to your unit manager and most of all take care of that pregnancy.

twoangels · Sep 29, 2009

Going in to this, I expected nights to be what would would work for my family the best. I have classmates who were hired at the same hospital for days, but on various med-surg units. The birthing center is a different story because of the low turnover. Now that I'm working nights, I realize that I need a lot of childcare so that I can sleep and I can't be with my kids as much as I thought I could. I feel disconnected from my family when I leave as they're getting ready for bed, and then come home to an empty house and have to sleep all day. Then on my first day off, I still have to sleep all day and still feel kind of "hungover" (for lack of a better word) on my second day off. I'm sure that the amount of sleep I am requiring is being skewed by the pregnancy, but it feels like after the 12 hour nights, my body/brain refuse to function without A LOT of sleep. I did 12 hour days in a LDRP for my senior practicum and had no trouble whatsoever. Of course, I wasn't pregnant then but my family life didn't feel so altered is what I mean.

What will happen to me if I'm still a new grad but I don't work until next spring? Will it be *that* much harder to get a job? :confused:

twoangels · Sep 29, 2009

I would start with your Doctor...see if you can go on medical leave. You might not be able to because you've only been there two months but this will get the ball rolling. It goes without saying that priority is the baby you are carrying. Honestly I dont know how you have hung in there so long. I was doing nights, not pregnant, children grown up and it was torture. As far as burning bridges dont assume this will happen. Its all in "how" you leave that determines the lasting impression that employer has of you. Get your Docs advice, then speak to your unit manager and most of all take care of that pregnancy.

Thank you, I would like to leave as gracefully as possible, thank them for everything and express that this is something that I don't WANT to do, but it is something that I feel I NEED to do for my sake, and this baby's sake.

linzz · Sep 29, 2009

I think a lot of what is going on is your pregnancy. When I had both of my children, my pregnancies was just miserable, n and v all the time, moods all over the map and some complications mixed in.If you stay, you will have to rest every minute you are home. If this doesn't work, I am sure they will understand that you need to be on a leave. It seems that some women just sail through their pregnancies, working right until the end, but lots of us just aren't that lucky.

mustlovepoodles, RN · Sep 29, 2009

Oh, boy, do I identify with you. I started out in L&D on the nightshift too, and I found it incredibly taxing--and I didn't have children! I worked nights for over 20 years and all it got me was 2 sleep disorders, a battle with obesity, severe foot & ankle problems, and chronic depression. I wish I had been able to quit years before I did. I think I'd be healthier now, in my 50s.

It seems to me that you have a lot of obstacles to overcome, not the least of which is that you are a new grad. It can take over a year for a new grad to get comfortable and competent in their job. Multiply that by pregnancy + young children + shift work+ health problems and you have a nearly impossible situation. First things first: You have to take care of yourself. Just like the airlines say, Put the oxygen mask on yourself before you put it on your children. If you falter, your children bear the burden. IMO, your family comes first. Talk to your OB about the stress you're under; see if you can go on leave. That may not be possible since you are still in your probationary period. They may decide to let you go. That doesn't sound like a terrible thing to me. Think of it this way--if you dropped dead, would the unit come crashing to a halt? No? Or would they just step over your cold dead body and keep on going?

If it were me? I'd quit. Life is too short to work under such stressful conditions. Your health and the health of your unborn baby is too important to mess around with. Taking a year off to have a baby is not the end of the world. I can't imagine that it will prevent you from ever getting a job. You got this job, didn't you? I believe that opportunity knocks more than once. It sounds like this job is just not right at this time.

cookienay · Sep 29, 2009

Twoangels, I agree with talking to your doctor first. It may be better to leave because of a temporary disability than to resign after only two months. In many places, leaving during your probationary period is an automatic "not eligible for rehire". Perhaps if you take a disability, you may leave on better terms. Some facilities also have a temporary light duty available as well. Your manager should know if that is available to you or not, but do not ask until after your doctor sets his limitations on what you can/cannot do. (That way you can avoid the appearance of trying to shirk your duties).

Good luck and keep us posted.