I will go ahead and state that this may be a sensitive topic, so please forgive me ahead of time if I offend anyone, it is not my intention. I just need some advice from people who may have experienced the same thing I am. This may get a little long-winded.
I am a new grad nurse who just took a position as a charge nurse on a post-acute unit. I absolutely LOVE my job from a clinical standpoint. I love my patients, and the environment is ever changing so it keeps me on my toes. I learned more the first day on the floor than any clinical rotation during school...which is awesome! That being said, my work environment is hostile.
I'm the new kid on the block, and I get that there will be people who don't like me no matter where I work, but this feels like more than that. I am Caucasian, one of only two Caucasians who work on this unit. There is one particular tech who has been here since Jesus was a baby, and she makes my life hell. No matter how politely I ask her to do something, she refuses if it's not something she wants to do right then. Ugh. I've offered to help her in completing certain tasks in an effort to establish that I am not "that nurse" who feels that I am above the work that techs do...still didn't matter. She gives me an attitude, raises her voice above mine every time I speak and just flat out disrespects me any opportunity she gets.
She and I had a disagreement about the way she spoke to a patients family. The family came for a compassionate care visit to see their loved one who was dying from covid complications. This tech was rude, disrespectful and basically made a heartbreaking situation more difficult for this family. I pulled the tech aside and asked her to let me handle the family from that point forward. After the family left she proceeded to attack me and claimed that I think I'm better than her because I am white. Wait, what?!! How did this become a race issue?
Since then there is tension with everyone I work with. I've had several other nurses and techs approach me and ask me if I really did call her the "N" word (which is a term that I have never and will never use or be OK with). The nurse who is on the same rotation as me for night shift is close with this tech. Since the disagreement, the night nurse has gone above and beyond to make it known she does not like me. She leaves nasty notes instructing me to do things, she will chart pertinent information about patients and claim she gave report to day nurse, but actually doesn't tell me about it. She throws me under the bus any chance she can.
There's much more, but that's the gist of it, and it is making the stress of being a new nurse so much worse. I've attempted to speak to both the tech and the night nurse, and that made things so much worse. I went to management and nothing changed. I actually had one manager tell me it's best if I just keep my head down and mouth shut to avoid conflict. Seriously?!!
I'm to the point where I would almost rather play in traffic blindfolded than to come to work. Here in lies the issue... I signed a 2 year contract with a sign-on bonus (which I cannot afford to pay back right now). What else can I do? Has anyone else been in a similar situation where you feel like your voice isn't being heard because of your race, religion, gender etc.?
I am not a nurse however I have been working as an ER tech for 7 years and have numerous negative encounters with other staff members because I always stand up for myself, and will not be spoken to in a negative manner.
Aside from that, I am very sorry that things aren’t going good at your new job. It’s unfortunate that this one individual is going above and beyond but it is time to get employee relations involved.
Have you spoken to your nurse manager regarding these incidents? If not, I would write them a very detailed e-mail regarding this, cc employee relations, possibly risk management, patient relations (due to her being aggressive towards a patients family members during a stressful time) and a higher up chief nursing officer about everything that you mentioned above. I would request an immediate 1:1 with the CNA that is doing this and have Employee relations present along with your nurse manager and Chief Nursing Officer (whom is above your nurse manager). Let them know you are honestly trying but you are being bullied and you refuse to allow others to treat you in such a way, which you shouldn’t have to. Also mention that it is very stressful time with everything going on and you should not have an additional stressor =the bully.
Also, that you do not feel safe nor do your patients, patients family feel safe.
Pull up the employee handbook and look for code of conduct, and the steps to being fired. Normally they list like what happens when you are aggressive towards staff members AND patients. Make sure you point out that her behavior strictly goes against company policy. Ask them in private if you are allowed to record her be aggressive to you, of course without her knowing that you were doing so.
Workplace bullying has always irritated me. I don’t feel that any position, in any role should allowed to be bullied. You as an employee, should not have to endure that kind of behavior from a staff member.
also mention how when you asked the bully to do a task within her scope of practice she gives you attitude/she refuses to do it, she was very hostile towards a dying patients staff family member. I would be aggressive towards this situation because honestly it is time for you to be aggressive back. I personally do you not trust anyone that I work with. I would do the same if I was you. Let me know how everything goes. I wish you the best and I am so sorry that this going on.
It's really sad that new grad have to go through issues like this at work. In my case it was opposite. I was the only black new grad among an all white co- workers, and they made my life a living hell. I was treated as an outsider. Nothing I did was good enough for them. When they give me handover report they purposely make sure that am being left with a lot of work to do. And if I dare complain, they all gang up against me. I cry myself home every time I finish work. I finally had enough and approach the unit manager who is also a white woman and HR also white. Nothing was done about the situation. It went from bad to worst that they started lying against me. To cut the long story short I ended up quiting the job and got a better job with more civilized co-workers who cherished diversity. So my advise to you is to not take the nonsense that I took. Make sure you get your lawyers involve and leave that hostile environment for your mental health.
Where did this happen? My entire career was spent practicing in both North and South Carolina and I never witnessed anything like that. My coworkers at the last place I worked (for 12 years) were white, black, English, Filipino, and Indian. My nurse managers over the years included one white male, one white female, and one black female.
For being the birthplace of the American Civil War, my work situation was very diverse and only morons would foster an atmosphere such as you have described. Hell, I was just glad to have the help. We never had enough staff and picking on each other was unlikely to make anyone else want to join us.
I made it a point to get along with each of my bosses because of my prior experience where I didn't get along with one at another hospital. It wasn't pretty and ultimately I was the only one to lose. You don't have to beat me but once for me to pick up the lesson!
Unfortunately some people will use the race card rather then trying to find the real reason. Without knowing who you work for and their history I can not say if there is a history of racism at that facility.
If race has nothing to do with what is going on where you work the person claiming racism is taking away from real racial issues.
This is my thought exactly. Take aim at the people who genuinely want to keep systemic racism prevalent. Take aim at the people who want to continue to wave their white privilege in your face and keep you down. Take aim at the people who still believe that an entire race of human beings is “less than” simply based on the color of their skin. Don’t ready your guns against someone who wants to stand beside you in that fight and scream for the injustice that has been served to you and your ancestors for centuries. *Rant over*
This is my thought exactly. Take aim at the people who genuinely want to keep systemic racism prevalent. Take aim at the people who want to continue to wave their white privilege in your face and keep you down. Take aim at the people who still believe that an entire race of human beings is “less than” simply based on the color of their skin. Don’t ready your guns against someone who wants to stand beside you in that fight and scream for the injustice that has been served to you and your ancestors for centuries. *Rant over*
The irony of someone who rails against "people who still believe that an entire race of people is "less than" simply based on the color of their skin" on the one hand and then invokes the specter of "white privilege" is to much for me to let go without noting. White people are privileged based on the color of their skin? There are plenty of poor white folks who might wonder what happened to their share.
You have drunk deeply from the Kool Aid, it would seem. Do you judge everything through the filter of racism? And if you do, who is the racist?
The irony of someone who rails against "people who still believe that an entire race of people is "less than" simply based on the color of their skin" on the one hand and then invokes the specter of "white privilege" is to much for me to let go without noting. White people are privileged based on the color of their skin? There are plenty of poor white folks who might wonder what happened to their share.
You have drunk deeply from the Kool Aid, it would seem. Do you judge everything through the filter of racism? And if you do, who is the racist?
My *rant over*.
I put it down to education. My grandparents were from Northern Europe and fled to America AS REFUGEES, something that escapes so many people here since their forebears were likely in the same position. Except for the English, everyone else were considered beneath them. That includes the Scots, Irish, German, French, everyone! Italians and Irish were the darker skinned or Muslims of their day in America and that was as recently as the 20's etc.
People need to learn their history and put into perspective where they actually stand. All men. We the people. They appear to be unable to realize that everyone will suffer some form of discrimination in some form or the other. Women from misogynists, ethnic people from racists, middle class from the upper class and so on.
I myself will not tolerate anyone bullying another in my presence and luckily I can back up my belligerence. Other people need to use the rules advocating for their rights and enlist the professionals like rights lawyers to help them when necessary.
White people are privileged based on the color of their skin? There are plenty of poor white folks who might wonder what happened to their share.
It's not always about money. Privileges can be about the ease of being 'accepted' without fear of being rejected. You don't need 'money' to speak socially to anyone.
This is what Allnurses is about!! I love reading the strategies of tenured, professional nurses, Been there,done that & Curious1997 thank you for taking the time to share your strategies.
It's not always about money. Privileges can be about the ease of being 'accepted' without fear of being rejected. You don't need 'money' to speak socially to anyone.
What a bunch of crab; if white privilege was true why do inner city whites have the same issues as inner city blacks. People who thing that their is white privilege are showing their own racist views. Otherwise why were does their rational come from other than blacks and other minorities have to have special help to get ahead in life because they are inferrer and unable to do it unless they are helped by whites.
This is my thought exactly. Take aim at the people who genuinely want to keep systemic racism prevalent. Take aim at the people who want to continue to wave their white privilege in your face and keep you down. Take aim at the people who still believe that an entire race of human beings is “less than” simply based on the color of their skin. Don’t ready your guns against someone who wants to stand beside you in that fight and scream for the injustice that has been served to you and your ancestors for centuries. *Rant over*
I believe you are agreeing with me at first but towards the end I am not sure. I will not stand for any form of racism no matter who it comes from because all races have racist in them. I once worked in a factory where a black man was fired for lying on the amount of work he did; we did piece work and paid by the number of pieces we produced a shift. He turned in more pieces than the machine could produce in an 8 hour shift without taking a lunch, break etc. When he was fired he claimed that he was fired because he was black not because he was cheating the company. This is why I like to know all the facts before I say someones actions are racist or not and don't tolerate people yell racism when it has nothing to do with the event on hand.
Its hard to understand white privilege if you assume that everyone is treated the same way. You have to be open or willing to explore race in order to understand that not all people are treated the same way. Truthfully, if you are not there to witness it how would you know? Thanks!
To OP, thanks for having the courage to bring this up. I wonder sometimes if this is a huge elephant in the room with nursing. Feel free to PM to vent about it, I know EXACTLY what you're talking about. The general laziness, refusal to do things, giving "attitude" when confronted, followed by talking and spreading it all over to poison the waters...sounds SO very familiar. And it's not right. I'm not white, but I've been on the receiving end of this behavior too many times. It's very prevalent, sadly.
msglitter215
2 Posts
I am not a nurse however I have been working as an ER tech for 7 years and have numerous negative encounters with other staff members because I always stand up for myself, and will not be spoken to in a negative manner.
Aside from that, I am very sorry that things aren’t going good at your new job. It’s unfortunate that this one individual is going above and beyond but it is time to get employee relations involved.
Have you spoken to your nurse manager regarding these incidents? If not, I would write them a very detailed e-mail regarding this, cc employee relations, possibly risk management, patient relations (due to her being aggressive towards a patients family members during a stressful time) and a higher up chief nursing officer about everything that you mentioned above. I would request an immediate 1:1 with the CNA that is doing this and have Employee relations present along with your nurse manager and Chief Nursing Officer (whom is above your nurse manager). Let them know you are honestly trying but you are being bullied and you refuse to allow others to treat you in such a way, which you shouldn’t have to. Also mention that it is very stressful time with everything going on and you should not have an additional stressor =the bully.
Also, that you do not feel safe nor do your patients, patients family feel safe.
Pull up the employee handbook and look for code of conduct, and the steps to being fired. Normally they list like what happens when you are aggressive towards staff members AND patients. Make sure you point out that her behavior strictly goes against company policy. Ask them in private if you are allowed to record her be aggressive to you, of course without her knowing that you were doing so.
Workplace bullying has always irritated me. I don’t feel that any position, in any role should allowed to be bullied. You as an employee, should not have to endure that kind of behavior from a staff member.
also mention how when you asked the bully to do a task within her scope of practice she gives you attitude/she refuses to do it, she was very hostile towards a dying patients staff family member. I would be aggressive towards this situation because honestly it is time for you to be aggressive back. I personally do you not trust anyone that I work with. I would do the same if I was you. Let me know how everything goes. I wish you the best and I am so sorry that this going on.