Need advice on how to get through Nursing School

Nursing Students General Students

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Hello everyone! I really need someones advice, any suggestions would be helpful. Well to begin I recently quit my job of 5 years so that I concentrate full time on my nursing classes since I just got accepted into the nursing program. Since then the father of my son, who I have been living with for four years now and he has agreed to take care of me and take care all of the financial responsibilities. I was a little hesitant to do this, but because I really want to complete nursing school I agreed. This will be my second week in nursing school and without working, now that I have to depend on him it is driving me crazy! I begin to think and remember that I'll be done in December 2010 but it doesn't seem fast enough because I do not love this man I have stopped loving him a long time ago and I'm almost sure he knows this. We've had differences that have led us to get to this point, I really don't want to be with him anymore, but what stops me is my financial need because I have a three year old son to take care of and therefore pay rent and bills. If I didn't have to quit my job I know I would be fine but it was working at a law firm and the hours are from 9-5 and those are usually the hours that I am in school because we are in a block schedule. I don't know what to do, I just can't stand being with him I feel so depressed just thinking about the fact that I basically have to put up with him for at least two years. Thank you for your time and your help! :crying2:

Specializes in OB/Peds.

I understand the hardship that the situation your in. I know at many places in my area have programs to help with assistance of vost during school if you sign a contract. For example, the place I go to school is a hosptil and will give students 5000 per year you agree to work for them after graduation. Or of forth... I would contact places HR department and ask them. I was suprised at the resources that are out there for nursing students.

As well.... schlorahips are very helpful. Anything extra from tution and all gets kicked back to you at midterm and I pay all my bills ahead with that money.

As well... loans can be healpful. Some employeers will pay your loans off after you graduation to get you to sign on with them.

If you have any other questions, I'd love to help ya.

:) Missy

if your using him , then that seems wrong. Although regardless you getting and finishing your education is what is best for your son. and that is in his best interest too. i don't know you at all but its sounds to me like you might have an underlying issue on having to depend on someone else and that may be causing you to feel resentful. I hope you can find a solution. its definately hard to depend on others but there are other solutions out there if you are in an unhealthy relationship. best of luck.

Just a thought, since you have no income, next year this time you will be able to file a tax return showing as much and use that to help you qualify for even MORE financial aid (since financial aid is largely based off of your tax returns /w2s, etc.).

It will take work to find resources to help you be on your own. Are you willing or able to get student loans, which are even allowed for use in school expenditures such as housing? Are you able to use whatever financial aid you have to buddy up with a fellow student and be room mates / get an apartment together?

I commend your decision to further your education. Think of the larger picture, your son and the end game, your degree. Education is not worth being miserable, but the stable environment for your son, believe it or not, is a bonus for you when it comes time to study....at least you'll be spending your time on school work, not worrying about who's turn it is to give your son a ride home from school, or to pick him up from the school nurse.

If the problem is that your son's dad is expecting intimacy in return for his helping you with a place to stay, against your wishes or better judgement, then you absolutely should decide how you want to draw your boundaries. You won't study any better when you feel physically on guard, pressured or violated.

If your sanity and peace require you to have a place of your own, do this:

Identify your resources (money, loans, savings, grants, scholarships, room mates, family members). Make a plan on how, when, and be strong, move forward. You'll be better for your sanity and ability to study effectively. Your man will be better when he realizes he really should look for companionship elsewhere, and your son will be better seeing you as an example of how to go after what is really important to you in life. All my best wishes to you. I know you will figure out what you need to to help you get through all this. Hugs.

:hngon:

You need to forget about everyone and focus on YOU. You are doing this and the degree will have your name on it... screw everyone else. :rotfl: and above all study study study!

sounds like you've got a lot of baggage going on. umm... the person prior to me that said screw everyone else... yikes! nursing school is no different than any other type of school. the only difference is that it's nursing. the hype and level of difficulty that is being given to you is mostly false. i'm not sure where the hype originates from.

I totally agree with inland18mempire. :yeahthat:

Please think about what you are doing, it is wrong to take advantage of another person like that. Find a weekend or night job, take out loans, move back home or find a roommate, there are tons of options out there for you. Have your father's son support you in ways that fit his role as a father, like watching your son while your at school/working, providing more child support than he has been, doing the grocery shopping, etc. Work something out so that in two years the two of you don't resent each other and ruin the friendship you'll need to raise this child.

I totally agree with a few things people have said:

Have your father's son support you in ways that fit his role as a father, like watching your son while your at school/working, providing more child support than he has been, doing the grocery shopping, etc. Work something out so that in two years the two of you don't resent each other and ruin the friendship you'll need to raise this child.

and,

If the problem is that your son's dad is expecting intimacy in return for his helping you with a place to stay, against your wishes or better judgement, then you absolutely should decide how you want to draw your boundaries. You won't study any better when you feel physically on guard, pressured or violated.

Aside from intimacy, don't put yourself in a position to be manipulated, period. If you use him, he will use you. I know you probably don't appreciate hearing that you are using him but depending on somebody for nothing in return, is using him--in a way. Many guys take advantage of the situation when they know they are needed. It boosts their egos and they will use it against you. I know if my husband left me, I would be screwed because I don't work either. I would have to take out loans and live with my mother throughout graduation.

Take out a student loan and find a roommate. If you can, try to live within a close enough distance of your son's father so that he can't manipulate you further once you move out. Because if he still loves you or wants to around he will find a way to make your life miserable. Try to leave things on a good note.

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