My 9 year old patient was raped and required surgery

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I currently have a 9 year old girl I am taking care of on unit. She was raped resulting in surgical repair to entire pelvic floor and also needed a colostomy. As I change her sheets and such I just don't know what to do. I cry everytime I walk in there. I just want to hold her. She isn't allowed visitors and she is so scared. My heart is breaking. Any advice?

Specializes in med/surg.

She had a great night. She slept all night with no problems. Today the detective wants to have me set up a video for her to tell me what happened again, I hate to do this, but it will save her from having to testify in person at trial so in the long run its best. I was told that i could be the only one in the room as she talks so hopefully she will feel somewhat comfortable. I kind of wish they'd hold off a little longer til she is feeling much better but they need to be able to do a swift prosecution. I want to make sure that monster is staying in jail before I take her home. Thanks again for everyones encouragement. I'm not an angel I'm just trying to do the right thing. I do believe that our paths crossed for a reason as well. I am looking forward to the journey the two of us are beginning together.

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Specializes in LTC, Med/Surg, Peds, ICU, Tele.

It'll evoke more sympathy if she's still in the hospital while being interviewed. I'm glad you're there for her.

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God have mercy on the person that did this to this small innocent girl.

God have mercy on the person that is causing this 9 year old girl this much pain.I pray that God will heal and erase this memory from this poor girl.

i only imagine if this is my child when i am reading this,what will i do.

It must be very hard taking care of this poor girl and i know it must definitely be hard for this girl later in life but i know that there is nothing impossible for God.God can heal all wounds.God have mercy on us.

Azor

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Specializes in med/surg.
God have mercy on the person that did this to this small innocent girl.

God have mercy on the person that is causing this 9 year old girl this much pain.I pray that God will heal and erase this memory from this poor girl.

i only imagine if this is my child when i am reading this,what will i do.

It must be very hard taking care of this poor girl and i know it must definitely be hard for this girl later in life but i know that there is nothing impossible for God.God can heal all wounds.God have mercy on us.

Azor

I understand where u are coming from with this but her dad deserves NO mercy. Her memories can never be erased but with time she can begin to heal and the pain will lessen to a degree that is somewhat bearable. I do appreciate your prayers.

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Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.

I'm so glad she can be videotaped and not have to face her attacker in court. Having to face one's attacker in a great big scary courtroom is very intimidating and frightening for a child. Any child. When that child has had such an atrocity committed against her body and soul, it is truly a travesty when her attacker can keep trying to maintain eye contact despite the prosecutor's best efforts to prevent it or tap his foot or his fingers in an attempt to unnerve her and remind her, yet again, that he once held final control over her. Attackers have been known to pick up then drop a tablet or file in an attempt to reassert his former control over the child. Videotaping prevents all his tries at subterfuge and control. Hopefully, she'll relax with only you present and retell her story just as she did the other

night. The fact that she's still in the hospital recovering from her second repair surgery to restore such a seemingly simple bodily function that most of us take for granted, will also speak volumes and say much more than she alone could. There are many kinds of angels and you certainly qualify although you don't have a visible halo. When the men are both safely stowed away in prison, we'll have an online party because justice was truly served!:balloons::balloons::balloons: and the guilty will spend their time:chair:.

Hugs,

sharpeimom:paw::paw:

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Specializes in med/surg.

Thanks Sharpeimom, I too am so glad they are doing the video. If her perp is has any sense at all he'd just plead guilty. The evidence against him is overwhelming. As far as the other perp I don't know how easy it will be to convict him, hopefully justice will prevail. She told me she wanted her dad to be in jail and said she never wanted to see her mom again either. It's so heartwrenching to hear her. Those words should never have to be spoken by such an innocent child anywhere. They should be here within the hour to begin the setup for me to begin with her. I talked to her about this morning and she said she's okay with doing it as long as no one else is in the room so I'll just try to keep her as comfortable as possible. I'll let ya know how she holds up.

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Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.

I have my fingers and toes crossed and prayers have been offered up that all goes well. From here on out, things can only begin to improve. We will continue to keep you in our prayers and hold you both in our hearts.

sharpeimom:paw::paw:

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Specializes in med/surg.

She was such a little trooper, the video is done. She just stated the facts and then she started talking about what it's been like being in the hospital. When she was through I held her for awhile as she and I cried together and she said she was happy that she was able to tell what happened. I assured her that she wouldn't be hurt again and she said " I know". I took the video out to the waiting detective and he and one of her physicians went into the conf. room and watched it. Both came out with puffy tear stained faces. As we all know it takes an awful lot to make these professional men break down. I'm just thankful it's over with.

They still haven't located the other perp. but I'm sure the hunt is on now. Apparently this other guy is a "buddy" of her dads. Let's just pray they catch him before he runs off and is able to hurt another child.

The trauma therapist is in talking to her now as I wait for her caseworker to bring me more paperwork, I should know within the next couple days if her placement with me is going to be a go. Just waiting for the judge to sign the orders. I feel in my heart that she will be with me, I have gotten way involved at this point and I just don't want to think about it not going through. There is a major shortage of Therapuetic foster homes in our area so I really don't see there being an issue with them allowing me to become her foster. Sorry I know I'm sort of rambling my thoughts are just racing all over the place. My charge nurse gave me a big hug a little bit ago, she didn't say anything but her embrace said it all. I've been so worried that my decision to take this on was going to affect my work enviroment but looks like they are coming around. Thanks again for your support I'd be lost without all of you to lean on.

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She was such a little trooper, the video is done. She just stated the facts and then she started talking about what it's been like being in the hospital. When she was through I held her for awhile as she and I cried together and she said she was happy that she was able to tell what happened. I assured her that she wouldn't be hurt again and she said " I know". I took the video out to the waiting detective and he and one of her physicians went into the conf. room and watched it. Both came out with puffy tear stained faces. As we all know it takes an awful lot to make these professional men break down. I'm just thankful it's over with.

They still haven't located the other perp. but I'm sure the hunt is on now. Apparently this other guy is a "buddy" of her dads. Let's just pray they catch him before he runs off and is able to hurt another child.

The trauma therapist is in talking to her now as I wait for her caseworker to bring me more paperwork, I should know within the next couple days if her placement with me is going to be a go. Just waiting for the judge to sign the orders. I feel in my heart that she will be with me, I have gotten way involved at this point and I just don't want to think about it not going through. There is a major shortage of Therapuetic foster homes in our area so I really don't see there being an issue with them allowing me to become her foster. Sorry I know I'm sort of rambling my thoughts are just racing all over the place. My charge nurse gave me a big hug a little bit ago, she didn't say anything but her embrace said it all. I've been so worried that my decision to take this on was going to affect my work enviroment but looks like they are coming around. Thanks again for your support I'd be lost without all of you to lean on.

God bless you! I am teary eyed after reading this post. I've been following this story and I'm hoping this child is placed with you for her sake.

I hope that daddy of hers (and I use that term VERY loosely) suffers at the hands of Bubba in jail. I'm sorry, I have no feelings for those who hurt and abuse children, especially their own.

I have a feeling this little girl is going home with you. Don't you worry about that. God has it under control.

I am going to my church's Nightwatch service tonight to bring in the new year. I will definately ask the church to lift you and this little girl up in prayer.

I am so filled with anger right now, I just want to spend some alone time with that daddy of hers and my 380. I'm sorry, but I really HATE child molesters. I have no mercy for them. This is why I can't be a Peds nurse. I had a patient during my clinicals that was being molested by her step father, I had to be removed from her case. I got too emotionally involved and it brought up my own personal feelings.

Don't you worry. You and that littel girl was meant to be in each other's life. God will see to it.

Do you have to testify?

I'm rambling too, so I'll end it for now.

Keep us updated!

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Specializes in med/surg.

Nurse2B09, Thanks for your encouragement. I will most likely have to testify if it goes to trial, meaning he could plead guilty to try and get a lighter sentence. It would probably be best if a trial isn't needed but I just don't want to see ANY lightening of his sentence.

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Specializes in ortho, hospice volunteer, psych,.

You were both great! Her healing can begin now that she's beginning to open up and tell. But, as I can tell you from my experience working with sexually abused children and their moms, you will eventually hit the point where you need to talk to a therapist about the secrets you've stored in your mind and your psyche. I love my wonderful husband with all my heart and soul, but I eventually got to the point that every night, I'd come in our door muttering, "all men are b******s..." or some other variant. Don't let yourself get to that point. When this immediate part is all over, find yourself someone qualified to unburden yourself to. You're doing a wonderful, caring, loving warm thing -- just don't let it affect who you are. Does that make sense or am I just rambling? I'm not trying to be bossy, but I remember how heavy the emotional load can get when listening is so much a part of your job.:heartbeat

sharpeimom plus hugs from the fur zoo

:paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw:

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Specializes in med/surg.
You were both great! Her healing can begin now that she's beginning to open up and tell. But, as I can tell you from my experience working with sexually abused children and their moms, you will eventually hit the point where you need to talk to a therapist about the secrets you've stored in your mind and your psyche. I love my wonderful husband with all my heart and soul, but I eventually got to the point that every night, I'd come in our door muttering, "all men are b******s..." or some other variant. Don't let yourself get to that point. When this immediate part is all over, find yourself someone qualified to unburden yourself to. You're doing a wonderful, caring, loving warm thing -- just don't let it affect who you are. Does that make sense or am I just rambling? I'm not trying to be bossy, but I remember how heavy the emotional load can get when listening is so much a part of your job.:heartbeat

sharpeimom plus hugs from the fur zoo

:paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw::paw:

Yes you make complete sense to me. I haven't been in therapy for many years, but I am going to begin going on a regular basis now. My old therapist is who I've had coming in to see my little one. She and I have decided that I need to start coming in again as well. I figure it can't hurt. I know what u mean about the "men" mentality I have also found myself feeling that way especially now. you see a random guy walking past and wonder if he's a perp as well. It's a horrible feeling and I don't like it but it is what it is. Still have trust issues after all these years, guess that's why I've never remarried fear of someone hurting my kids. I encourage everyone to look up the site for your area on registered sex offenders. It's eye opening to see just how many our out there and so close to home. Ok I'll get off this now before I get too worked up. Take care. Thanks.

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