My heart is broken today - How can I give right now?

Mimi2RN, ASN, RN · Oct 12, 2004

My condolences, too. It's a hard decision to make, but a necessary one. The last one of ours with kidney disease was 16, I asked my vet for something to relax her when the time came to take her in. She had lost so much weight that she died at home, thanks to the stadol.

You did the right thing. It will take time for you to heal, pets are part of your family.

Mimi2RN, ASN, RN · Oct 12, 2004

My condolences, too. It's a hard decision to make, but a necessary one. The last one of ours with kidney disease was 16, I asked my vet for something to relax her when the time came to take her in. She had lost so much weight that she died at home, thanks to the stadol.

You did the right thing. It will take time for you to heal, pets are part of your family.

Stitchie · Oct 12, 2004

is to say goodbye to someone so loved. You made a wonderful and happy life for your fur-baby for 18 years -- how proud you must feel of your accomplishment. His time here on earth is done now, and now he is an eternally happy, healthy 'heaven' kitty with many others to spend time with.

His last lesson to you must be unfailingly unselfishness and to be gentle with yourself. You would never want him to suffer a second longer than necessary.

It's hard, though, and this too will pass.

Many hugs and warm thoughts

(((((((stitchie))))))))

Stitchie · Oct 12, 2004

is to say goodbye to someone so loved. You made a wonderful and happy life for your fur-baby for 18 years -- how proud you must feel of your accomplishment. His time here on earth is done now, and now he is an eternally happy, healthy 'heaven' kitty with many others to spend time with.

His last lesson to you must be unfailingly unselfishness and to be gentle with yourself. You would never want him to suffer a second longer than necessary.

It's hard, though, and this too will pass.

Many hugs and warm thoughts

(((((((stitchie))))))))

Snowee · Oct 12, 2004

Don't doubt yourself. Your motivation was one of love for your kitty, not anything else. Since I rescue cats, I have had lots of situations calling for me to "play God" with the kitties' lives. It's never easy, but based on dozens and dozens of experiences, I never pull out all the stops anymore for anything other than trauma cases. I had it work out only once, but for all the other kitties, it just made them miserable. Better that your companion died before suffering instead of like so many poor kitties, sticky with medicines, with tubes in them, scared and totally sick feeling. As to not having anything to "give" while being heartbroken, I think that you should allow yourself to feel sad...

Limik · Oct 12, 2004

My heart is broken today. I had my beautiful 18 yr. old kitty put down today. He had CRF and was failing. I am filled with doubt. Did I do the right thing? What if he could have rallied one last time and I didn't let him? I even think, did I do it for my own convenience so I wouldn't have to deal with this later in the week/month(s) when I didn't have time? For cat lovers and non-cat givers alike, we all know we deal with this issue every day with our patient families. And our response is yes, family, you are doing the right thing by making your loved one comfortable until the end. In my case, I made the decision before he got any sicker. So why am I having such a hard time with this? And how can I comfort families when I feel so lost and empty inside?

Oh, I so feel your pain. About six months ago I had to put my precious kitty down because he had feline leukemia. To this day I still cry like a baby when I think about it. I had the same doubts that you do, but with some time behind me now, I realize that he was suffering and would have continued to do so. It was one of the hardest decisions I've ever had to make, but one that I think was best for my Sonny. Just know that you did what was kindest for your beloved pet. My sincerest sympathies to you.

Limik

wonderbee, BSN, RN · Oct 12, 2004

How sad. I'm so sorry for the loss of your good friend. Of course you did the humane thing. It was certainly not what you wanted to do. It was out of love for your friend.

aimeee, BSN, RN · Oct 13, 2004

I'm sad to hear of your loss. (((((hugs)))))

Grace Oz · Oct 13, 2004

((((hug))) earlier this year, i walked the road you are travelling at present, and it's really a very sad time. the grief is tangible and real. our beloved cat was also 18 years old, had been with us most of the lifetime of our children who are now adults. she was a much loved and valued family pet.

don't worry what others may think, remember.......

[color=#4b0082]never judge another man / woman, until you walk a mile in their shoes.

[color=#4b0082]

take time to grieve, and hang on to your happy memories of your beloved pet.

warm wishes to you....

grace

Midwest4me · Oct 13, 2004

My heart is broken today. I had my beautiful 18 yr. old kitty put down today. He had CRF and was failing. I am filled with doubt. Did I do the right thing? What if he could have rallied one last time and I didn't let him? I even think, did I do it for my own convenience so I wouldn't have to deal with this later in the week/month(s) when I didn't have time? For cat lovers and non-cat givers alike, we all know we deal with this issue every day with our patient families. And our response is yes, family, you are doing the right thing by making your loved one comfortable until the end. In my case, I made the decision before he got any sicker. So why am I having such a hard time with this? And how can I comfort families when I feel so lost and empty inside?

Oh yes of course you did the right thing--it would have been harder to see him suffer the sicker he became. My condolences go out to you too. I also send to you HUGS!!!!

momcats3 · Oct 19, 2004

I would like to thank each and every one of you who sent words of kindness. I truly appreciate it... I'm still heartbroken, but life goes on, and you adjust. You never "get over" it....

I still wonder, though. How do you provide comfort, sympathy and support during those times when you are empty or grieving? I guess you just pull yourself up by your britches and do what needs to be done. It doesn't seem healthy, though it's not healthy to submerge yourself in grief, either. Anyway, thanks again to you all.

Momcats3:sniff:

webblarsk · Nov 28, 2004

I am so sorry for the loss of your kitty. You did the right thing..........often times people are so selfish and let their pet continue to suffer. My thoughts are with you!