Mom trying to talk me out of nursing

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I wanted to be a nurse when I first started college at 18(now28), but my mom told me I could do anything BUT nursing. She was paying so I didn't do it. I got half way through a business administration program and dropped out because it wasn't what I wanted to do. I got married and had a baby instead of finishing school.

Anyway I started back to school and I am finishing my last prerequisites and applying to nursing school right now. My mom however, is being less than supportive. I have gotten to where I rarely talk to her.

We were talking oneday about nursing and about my friend that is a tech and she said in so many words that nurses are 'rear wipers':eek: . I told her that nurses do some of that stuff but that is definitly now all they do. Her reply was "yes they do, do a little paper work".

Since she wasn't convinced that nurses did more than wipe rears, I told her about I girl I know that is a new grad. She got a job at the hospital I volunteer at making $30 an hour. I said "I would love to wipe rears for $30 and hour"LOL. She didn't laugh though.

Another day we were talking about shoes and about our feet hurting and I told her how bad my feet hurt when I was waiting tables. She tells me because of this that there is no way I can be a nurse. I told her I will be able to afford good shoes but she just rolled her eyes at me. She also told me that someone told her that in nursing school you have to disect cats; and I won't be able to do it. My response was "that is A&P and I had no problem doing it". She just said "oh".

My father was really sick with cancer recently, and I would think she would have developed some kind of respect for nurses but she hasn't. I wonder if she even knew who the RNs were when she was at the hopital. Maybe she thought the CNAs were the RNs. I just can't figure her out and she is pissing me off.:angryfire

Specializes in Burn/Trauma PCU.

i'm sorry she is being so unsupportive about something you are obviously passionate about! :(

have you tried to talk with her and ask her exactly why she doesn't like nurses (or the profession) so much? sounds like there's something else there. maybe she had a traumatic experience at the hands of a bad nurse one time... or maybe wanted to do it herself and was talked out of it... i don't know.

don't let her stomp all over your dream. if she's going to be so negative about it, don't discuss it with her, and if she brings it up herself, tell her you won't discuss it with her unless she can address you and your choice with respect, which she can do and still disagree with your choice, if that's how she feels.

It sounds like your mom is jealous and has some insecurities. Now that you are pursuing your dream (good for you!) you can look at your mom from a different perspective, and realize that it is actually sad she is this discouraging and unsupportive. And know that you would/will do things much differently if you ever have a daughter in your life.

Best of luck to you!

~J

I wanted to be a nurse when I first started college at 18(now28), but my mom told me I could do anything BUT nursing. She was paying so I didn't do it. I got half way through a business administration program and dropped out because it wasn't what I wanted to do. I got married and had a baby instead of finishing school.

Anyway I started back to school and I am finishing my last prerequisites and applying to nursing school right now. My mom however, is being less than supportive. I have gotten to where I rarely talk to her.

We were talking oneday about nursing and about my friend that is a tech and she said in so many words that nurses are 'rear wipers':eek: . I told her that nurses do some of that stuff but that is definitly now all they do. Her reply was "yes they do, do a little paper work".

Since she wasn't convinced that nurses did more than wipe rears, I told her about I girl I know that is a new grad. She got a job at the hospital I volunteer at making $30 an hour. I said "I would love to wipe rears for $30 and hour"LOL. She didn't laugh though.

Another day we were talking about shoes and about our feet hurting and I told her how bad my feet hurt when I was waiting tables. She tells me because of this that there is no way I can be a nurse. I told her I will be able to afford good shoes but she just rolled her eyes at me. She also told me that someone told her that in nursing school you have to disect cats; and I won't be able to do it. My response was "that is A&P and I had no problem doing it". She just said "oh".

My father was really sick with cancer recently, and I would think she would have developed some kind of respect for nurses but she hasn't. I wonder if she even knew who the RNs were when she was at the hopital. Maybe she thought the CNAs were the RNs. I just can't figure her out and she is pissing me off.:angryfire

Your mother sounds alot like my mother.....maybe the best thing to do is not to discuss this particular topic with her anymore. I know how much it hurts if we need the approval from the people we love the most and don't get it. But in this case you have to distance yourself from your mother's negative reactions and keep moving forward towards your goal. Don't try to defend your position or argue with her. Tell her the subject is not up for discussion......Mine would have a fit if she knew what I am doing so I won't share anything with her because I am tired of her negative reactions to the things I do.

Good luck in your future

Specializes in Acute Care Psych, DNP Student.

What I am thinking is pure speculation. Sometimes women are predjudiced against traditionally female occupations in order to identify with the more powerful sex, men. So they denigrate traditionally female occupations. This comes to mind because I have been guilty of it in the past. I had pink-collar predjudice and worked in predominantly male occupations.

Anyway, it's a form of self-hate as a woman.

Her comment about you not being able to dissect cats really bothers me. She is really trying to undermine you, which is awful.

She is clearly projecting some of her own troubles onto nursing. I hope you decide to deflect her 'stuff' all and go for it.

Specializes in Operating Room.

Tell her to live her life through her ownself, and not try to live it through you.

You have to live for the rest of your life without depending on her & this is what will make you happy.

Even if it doesn't, there are so many other areas to go into, even if it requires more education in the future.

Perhaps she doesnt know that nursing is the ONLY guaranteed job when you graduate. You can spend 4 yrs. on a business degree and find no job when you get out. Nursing is where the demand and money is period. My parents actually told me to go for it and at 22 I was in Nursing one and dropped out, now at 32 I am going back. Dont let them get you down just do it!! Good Luck!

Specializes in Operating Room.

My mom only said something about Bachelors for more money.

I told her that I am working on my RN-BSN bridge while waiting to get into nursing school, but I won't get paid any different. (Or much more)

Some people just have a false view on many things. I guess nothing will change this.

I'm sure my mom would be the same way, except that her mom was a nurse. LOL

You're grown, she can get over it. (You're grown, so let her groan.) :clown:

Another day we were talking about shoes and about our feet hurting and I told her how bad my feet hurt when I was waiting tables. She tells me because of this that there is no way I can be a nurse. I told her I will be able to afford good shoes but she just rolled her eyes at me. She also told me that someone told her that in nursing school you have to disect cats; and I won't be able to do it. My response was "that is A&P and I had no problem doing it". She just said "oh".

I waited tables and bartended for 8 years before graduating from LPN school.

My feet hurt then after a brutal shift of waiting tables, and my feet hurt now as an RN after a brutal shift in ICU or PACU.

No difference.

I only went to LPN school in the first place to get my parents off my back as they were concerned that at the ripe old age of 24, that I was destined to become a career waiter/bartender for all eternity if I didn't go back to school to do something else.

BTW, I noticed that you are in Texas too.

I don't know all of the details behind it, but I never had to dissect a cat or any other animal in A&P class. I did have to look at, and name specific parts and answer lab practical questions while looking at a gutted animal that another student cut open.

There were always more than enough volunteers to do the actual dissection and my instructors told me that no student in any Texas public college can be forced to perform animal dissection as a requirement for a science grade, it's policy or law of some sort but that's all I know. I never had to do it and no one else was ever forced to do it in my classes either.

Animal dissection and sore feet are the least of your worries, and so is whatever your mother thinks about nursing.

She needs to get her own life and career and leave yours alone.

I waited tables and bartended for 8 years before graduating from LPN school.

My feet hurt then after a brutal shift of waiting tables, and my feet hurt now as an RN after a brutal shift in ICU or PACU.

No difference.

I only went to LPN school in the first place to get my parents off my back as they were concerned that at the ripe old age of 24, that I was destined to become a career waiter/bartender for all eternity if I didn't go back to school to do something else.

BTW, I noticed that you are in Texas too.

I don't know all of the details behind it, but I never had to dissect a cat or any other animal in A&P class. I did have to look at, and name specific parts and answer lab practical questions while looking at a gutted animal that another student cut open.

There were always more than enough volunteers to do the actual dissection and my instructors told me that no student in any Texas public college can be forced to perform animal dissection as a requirement for a science grade, it's policy or law of some sort but that's all I know. I never had to do it and no one else was ever forced to do it in my classes either.

Animal dissection and sore feet are the least of your worries, and so is whatever your mother thinks about nursing.

She needs to get her own life and career and leave yours alone.

Hi, I am in San Antonio...maybe I should just get into my car and cruise down to the coast for the weekend :coollook: We went on our Honeymoon to Corpus Christi

Specializes in med surg, icu.

Do what you want to do! Become a nurse!

I spent the last 9 years of my life-- 4 as a cadet at a military academy and 5 as an officer-- graduating from the school my dad wished he could have gone to and having the rank he wished he could have gotten. Sure, he was happy he was living his dreams through me... but the sad fact of the matter is:

I WAS COMPLETELY MISERABLE.

This is YOUR life. This is YOUR future. Become something and somebody who you want to be... and do something that gives you a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment at the end of the day.

I say GO FOR IT!

And when you're finally successful and happy, maybe she'll realize that nurses are a lot more than "butt wipers"... but if she doesn't, it doesn't matter. At least you're doing something that makes you happy.. and that's what counts most in the grand scheme of things.

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