No friends in my class?

  1. Okay so I started VN school about 4 months ago and everyone has formed their groups and friends. I found one friendly that I usually stick with but sadly she is transferring. We connected because were both 19 and the youngest in the class. So I wanted to try to make friends with everyone else so you know I can have help with studying and I can them with studying and just to make the class fun and go by smoothly. Apparently these chicks do not want anything to do with anyone else. If you're not in their group they don't even want to talk to you lol. Even in clinicals you know I try to talk and have a buddy since it is our first rotation and all of us were so nervous. Nope, that did not happen. I already had a classmate be so rude to me saying I don't work hard enough when she had no idea what I was even doing. The rest just don't like me talking to them. I guess I'm going to have to go about this on my own. Is it normal to have such rude people in a cohort? I see other terms and they alllllll seem very nice to each other. I don't need friends, but if would take the "left out" feeling away.
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    About BJA98

    Joined: Nov '18; Posts: 2; Likes: 2

    11 Comments

  3. by   Sour Lemon
    It's somewhat unusual to have no friends in class, although not everybody has close friends in class. Do you make friends easily elsewhere?
    Just keep being friendly, but don't try too hard. You're there for education, after all.
    As a side note, you should refrain from using the LVN credential until you are actually an LVN. Hopefully that's not too far off.
  4. by   BJA98
    Yes I do make friends easily usually, just you know they get pretty good test scores and I can't even ask them what they do to study without being looked down on... maybe it's just my class? It's the first time for me that I don't have a go-to group.
  5. by   MissDiagnosis
    Just kill them with kindness. Ignore their rude comments and focus on yourself and doing what you need to do to pass the program. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. My cohort wasn't like this. We all got along, and still do after we've graduated. We keep in touch and are still very close.

    Our friendships weren't instant though. We all had to learn about each other and some friendships were formed later in the program. I think this is because we lost half the class in the first semester. We were always nice to one another but it took a little time for us to all become close as a whole class.

    As far as studying, registered nurse RN on YouTube helped my class tremendously. We all watched her videos and took notes from them. She explains the subjects in her video in a clear but concise manner that's easy to understand and learn. We also made quizlets and shared them amongst the class.

    We also used the online resources that came with our books. The test banks for the books were a godsend.
  6. by   Spadeforce
    I had one friend in nursing school. Better to hang out with people elsewhere than those who might back stab you with personal information.
  7. by   ShadowNurse
    Nursing school is very much a trial by fire. Most people are just trying to survive. Some classes just mesh well, while others fall apart under the stress. Both of my classes hung tight through everything, but not every one will. And even though my class supported each other, I was not friends with everyone. I'm just not that much of an extroverted person, and that's cool. Keep focused on your studies and continue being kind to others. That will go a long way no matter what happens.
  8. by   Chrispy11
    I was older and kept to myself. I would help people without being asked, but didn't do the study group thing. Turns out it was better for me since I found the study groups became more of a social than study thing. I did however hang out with the students who were closer to me in age. We would get together in clinicals and during breaks to quick crams and pass it on.

    Regarding the others not wanting anything to do with you 4 months in. I'm not saying their behavior is right, but did you try and connect before your friend left? Your tone does sound a little angry. You said you wanted friends to make the class fun and that a classmate said you didn't work hard enough. What gave them that perception?

    My class was very diverse in age and there were a mother and daughter (your age) in class. The daughter originally tried to be part of another group her own age, but came back to Mom and us old folks because her perception of her peers were that they didn't take it serious enough for her. She said her study group had members late or never show and not much studying being done. The daughter needed to prove to group members (other than mom) that she worked hard.

    I'm not trying to give you a hard time, but becoming a group requires acceptance and respect. Both of which need to be earned and aren't automatic. Show them you're serious with your actions. Once you're accepted (and it won't take too long) you can show them your fun side.

    Best of luck to you.
  9. by   dinah77
    I'm sorry this is happening to you. That's tough. But as long as you have one friend to hang with, try to keep your chin up.

    There can be danger in cliques in Nursing school, it's so ridiculously stressful. Here's what can happen when you're in a group, this a thread I wrote while in school

    Nursing School Drama queens
  10. by   FolksBtrippin
    I graduated with zero friends in my cohort. Literally zero. I had one, but that fell apart at the end. Other than the one friend I had a falling out with, I had some people I was friendly with, but no actual friends.

    Anyway, I still got a 3.8 GPA. Passed Nclex in 75 questions and got the job I wanted right out of school.

    I think this is tougher to deal with at 19. I was 40ish, and already had a full social life outside of school.

    My advice is to just study extra hard, be the very best student you can be and let everything roll off your back. Other students will come to you for help if you are a great student. Help them, as long as you don't feel burdened by it. You'll probably develop some relationships, even if they aren't quite friendships.

    And if everyone turns out to be a duck, then pluck em. As long as you keep your head in the books, you'll still get to be a nurse at the end of the day.
  11. by   traumaRUs
    Moved to LVN/LPN nursing student forum
  12. by   Potatoes123
    They don't want to help you study. Whether it's true or not, they probably think you want them to do the work for you and to teach you.
  13. by   WestKyKing
    It'll be okay. Buckled down and study by yourself. Sometimes it's better that way simply because study groups can quickly turn into "forget the books lets just gossip and eat pizza" groups, lol.

    But, I do know that nursing school is a rough experience, and it makes it hard when you feel as if you are going through it alone. I mean, we have our family and outside friends, but it helps when you have somebody who is going through the situation with you. BUT, the goal is to pass and gain a successful career, not to find a new best friend. So keep your eyes on the prize.

    And......yes people tend to clique up at the beginning. That's just how things go. But as the time goes on... numbers will start to dwindle..and the remaining few will get closer with each other. Hang in there.

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