Losing patience with residents.

ktwlpn, LPN · Sep 7, 2014

If an alert, oriented person threw a cup of hot coffee at my staff, that person would be asked to leave.

We don't really have that option,we are the county home,100% medicare certified and there is no place else for them to go.It seems the worse cases have some family member with a local political connection.

innercitynurse · Sep 10, 2014

Sometimes nurses are expected to have superhuman patience that even Mother Theresa didn't have. I think some of it comes from our roots in religious orders- many nurses used to be nuns-and also that it is a female dominated profession. Women are expected to put up with things that no man ever would. Many people view nursing as a "calling" and not a career and we get little sympathy for abuse we take from patients, doctors, families, etc. I also lack patience for taking abuse and managed to find a career in Public Health that enabled me to stay in nursing for 30+ years and enjoy it. Geriatrics was not for me. Don't be discouraged by your first job. Keep looking for something better. You WILL eventually find it.

Code Red · Sep 10, 2014

How do you deal with residents who test your limits? I've only been a nurse one month and I feel like I want to scream seeing certain residents tread up the hall to the nurses station because I know exactly what they are coming there for. They are the ones with all the behavioral issues that the DON and Administrator refuse to have sent out for evaluation. The pain pill seekers. The attention seekers. The confused residents who are yelling because they are convinced something has been stolen. (I'm a little less impatient with them, because they really just are lost and helpless.) I just feel like I'm at a breaking point and have only just begun my nursing career. Any advice besides starting a yoga class to deal with stress? Lol

I totally understand. I've been doing this for a long time so I can empathize with you. One thing I can share with you about how I deal with this is something you've probaby heard over and over again and if you haven't trust me you will hear it again. That is... "Don't take it personal" it sounds corny but its the best skill you will learn when not just dealing with patients but society as a whole. I don't get my panties all twisted in a knot over non sense. Once you've mastered this skill I promise you all the weight of headache stress will shred to pieces. Try it! :coollook: GOOD LUCK!

macsarah · Sep 10, 2014

Sounds to me that maybe LTC isn't the best fit for you. I have worked LTC for over 19 years, yes, there are some challenging residents, but the bonds you create with them last a lifetime

Chica22 · Sep 10, 2014

Agreed, I have a similar situation where a Resident is faking a certain attack. It is very sad when it takes precious moments away from other residents. The cause is known but we still need some compassion/patience during said "emergencies." Until the issue can be resolved, I'm going to do my best in being proactive with other residents and give them time and attention so that when their care is interrupted, they may not feel as badly.

RkfdNurse1 · Sep 11, 2014

Sbrewster. Do what I did. You go to the kitchen and say "Hey, I have a resident that always wants coffee at 2 am or else he gets very upset. How can we get access to a coffee pot at the time of noc, or is it possible for you to order instant coffee we can keep on the hall for residents to drink when they'd like?" I got a coffee pot, coffee and all the condiments we needed for the residents. I would actually bring in flavored coffees the residents would love to try. You never know what will happen if you ask for help to make life better for your residents!!

MaureenT · Sep 11, 2014

Please remember many patients are frightened and don't like being told what and when their requests/ needs will be met. Stay professional and don't take things personally.

Aggressive behavior should be documented. Hang in there.:)

kbrn2002, ADN, RN · Sep 14, 2014

LTC is no doubt frustrating when dealing with "problem" residents. All the things you mentioned in your second post I deal with every day, as probably every nurse that works LTC does. Residents yelling help for no reason, paranoia about lost or stolen items, med seeking, attention seeking, just plain demanding and sincerely believing that whatever their need is, it is way more important than what anybody else might need. The resident that cries wolf so much that if a day comes where there actually is a problem I will probably not believe it.

LTC is also rewarding and can be fun. Try to keep a good sense of humor, it'll really help. Remember the residents are in LTC for a reason; even the ambulatory, alert and oriented ones are there because they require around the clock care. As for your nightly coffee guy, unless there is a reason he can't have coffee at 2 am talk to the unit supervisor or DON and dietary about making arrangements for him to get his coffee. It is after all his home and he should have access to coffee when he wants it.

Here.I.Stand, BSN, RN · Sep 14, 2014

It shouldn't be too hard to careplan some access to coffee, if you know he likes it at odd hours. Can his family bring in a small coffee maker, or is there money in his account for the SW to buy him one? If not, can the kitchen supply a small carafe of coffee to be refrigerated and heated up when he wants a cup? Or get some good quality instant?

Brattygirl it's not like I wouldn't give him some if I could. The kitchen is locked up and they don't let us have a key. They just leave snacks outside on a cart for the residents. I feel for him, but there's nothing I can do and there are better ways of dealing with anger than throwing childish fits.

Purple_roses · Sep 14, 2014

Try empathizing. They are in a place that is NOT home to them. Many times they have been dropped off without a choice. Some of them even believe they are being held hostage. Can you imagine how scary it would be to truly believe you were being held hostage? If you have a hard time empathizing, maybe nursing home work isn't for you. It does NOT mean you are a bad nurse. I believe each nurse has a unique gift to offer, and yours may be in a different area.

ktwlpn, LPN · Sep 14, 2014

Thanks for all the feedback. I'm trying to improve daily. I think what gets to me most is the residents who are not suffering from dementia. Like I said, a have a much easier time dealing with them. It's the ones who know where they are, what they're doing, and make us out to be evil, lazy bleepity bleeps. Coffee guy will not be here in about 4 weeks. And the nurses don't have a coffee machine. Nor do we have instant. But maybe I'll have to splurge and get some because I can only take so many cups thrown towards me in one shift.

It may help you to realize that an older person with a number of health problems is potentially facing a crisis on a daily basis, knows and fears it. Once you reach a certain age you have to start facing your own mortality-the possible loss of your health, the ability to care for yourself and remain independent,the loss of your dignity. And it's not uncommon to have some discomfort daily, also sleep disturbances,GI isssues,bladder and bowel concerns.

Think about this-your fellow who is only going to be with you for a short time-don't you think he turns his head and sees his future reflected back at him from those residents? You can bet on it-he is SCARED TO DEATH!!!

This time will come for you in the future,too. One day you will realize you are admitting people the same age as you. You will walk into work every day praying you will be spared that fate. You will remind yourself daily the population you see in LTC is really only a small segment of the elderly and you hope you will never be there.

In truth ,you are only anon fortunate turn of fate away from admission yourself. A car accident, an attack after a concert or a night out at a club could leave you with a traumatic brain injury and you could live for 20 years in LTC.A gentic "oops" and in a few years you have MS,ALS.

Think about it.