Is there really a huge amount of horizontal violence(bullying) in the profession

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  1. Are you happy in nursing school

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I'm curious to know if you guys in nursing school really feel like this profession has bullying.

Do you find it hard to work with your classmates? Do you like your teachers or do they scare the life out of you. One of my biggest fears is being bullied and it is what holding me back from pursuing this profession.

Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
I'm curious to know if you guys in nursing school really feel like this profession has bullying.

Do you find it hard to work with your classmates? Do you like your teachers or do they scare the life out of you. One of my biggest fears is being bullied and it is what holding me back from pursuing this profession.

I suspect you weren't directing this query at me, a seasoned nurse. But if you're really letting fear of bullying hold you back from pursuing a profession, I'm thinking that you need the opinion of someone who is actually IN the profession.

Had you asked me 35 years ago if there was bullying, and had that been a concept then, I might have said yes. But the thing is, I was young and didn't really know how to get along with my colleagues at a real job. (Bar tending, waitressing, being a maid and any one of the other B flat jobs I held in school didn't really prepare me for being a professional.) Once I got a bit of experience under my belt and figured some things out, the "bullying" went away. It wasn't THEM, it was ME.

You tend to read a lot about bullying on this board, most of it from people who have not yet figured out that the majority of what passes for "bullying" isn't really bullying, but it's someone who has not yet figured out how to get along with their colleagues and is blaming THEM for their troubles. I'm not saying that bullying doesn't exist -- it does -- everywhere, not just in nursing. I remember a group of engineers who pounded nails into a guy's tires every day because they didn't like him. I can only guess how expensive that got for the poor guy! My ex-husband was in the UAW, and the shenanigans that went on there were not only cruel but life threatening. What passes for "bullying" in nursing is very mild compared to that.

You, having discovered Allnurses.com, have a unique advantage that I didn't have when I started out -- if you use it. You have the ability to describe what's going on at your workplace, ask for advice and then weed out the advice of someone who has been there/done that from the advice of all those with no experience who want to put in their two cents, and TAKE that good advice. My life would have been so much easier 35 years ago if I could have asked for advice from a place like this. I would have learned SO much faster.

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Specializes in Critical Care, ED, Cath lab, CTPAC,Trauma.
"nurses eat their young" and it seems from what I have experienced... men get the brunt of it. As a male nurse in his 30's with ADHD... I have faced lots of hostility (99% behind my back). I was targeted by 2 professors in particular in nursing school... but that made me a stronger nurse... we had dinner only 90 mins into shift that semester... and I had 3-4 very sick GI and Onco patients and would get asked what are new med orders for today, whats H&H, whats d/c plan at dinner... and "vital signs are vital" so I worked out in my head... to get vitals and check in with sickest patient first (not always the squeaky wheel) and found 2 acute situations at shift change... one was in fluid overload from afternoon chemo.. another stoic patient tried to ambulate self to bathroom and was on the floor..

I am curious how do you see this as NETY and because you are male. You had 90 minutes to see you 4 patients check their chart, check labs, and get a set of vitals.

As soon as I get report I check my charts to be sure no stats have been missed or changed before I pass AM meds. I check the labs for the day to see if any need to be called or need immediate attention. I then go and get vitals on all my patients and do a brief focused assessment. If they are CHF I listen to their lungs. If they are surgical I check the site. I check IV's and say I will be back.

Questioning you was helping you learn how to prioritize and it worked....you are the better nurse for it.

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Specializes in Public Health.

I feel like a lot of this is meekness. Maybe because I have been a CNA for five years, but I have never been a victim of this "bullying". Idk if it's because of my experience or my personality but I do not accept this, even from my supervisors. There is ALWAYS a better way to handle frustration and belittling a student is never the way. I LOVE teaching so I love the newbies

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I know that group projects are intended to bridge the divide between different populations of students, so that we "come together", but honestly - they are the biggest source of strife, bullying accusations and general misery that I've dealt with throughout nursing school. People who previously were indifferent towards one another come out of those group projects hating one another's guts. I've switched to professors who do not force group projects just as a mean of saving my own sanity - as a nurse, I am responsible for my own practice, and as a student, I am fine with holding myself accountable. I cannot say that about some people I've encountered, but I also don't wish to make their problems my problems via group projects.

That being said, I have seen some grossly inappropriate behavior during my time in the hospital that someone who was the target could certainly construe as bullying. People's hours being unfairly docked, gossiping, given assignments that are clearly unfair in comparison to the workload given to their coworkers or consistently given crummy assignments by nurse managers looking to get rid of them. It does happen.

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Thank you for this response. Very well spoken and it gives me something to think about. And I would love to hear from you, an experienced nurse filled with insight. That makes a lot of sense about how it is about learning to deal with people. I've never really thought of it that way. Maybe I lack a bit of social intelligence which hopefully experience can change (though I am guessing it is a tough process). I think my bad people skills makes me come off as weak and sometimes I start seeing myself in a victim light. But thank you for your advice it is about getting along with people and handling potential difficult situations effectively. And no matter which profession I go in there will always be this factor. Now how do I get less afraid. Just take it one day at a time?

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I liked your example of how the RT person. It addresses the situation but you don't accused of being too sensitive or too aggressive. Thanks for telling me about your experience.

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Thanks again for all of your responses. It really helps me out. And I hope more will reply as well.

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Specializes in CCU, SICU, CVSICU, Precepting & Teaching.
Thank you for this response. Very well spoken and it gives me something to think about. And I would love to hear from you, an experienced nurse filled with insight. That makes a lot of sense about how it is about learning to deal with people. I've never really thought of it that way. Maybe I lack a bit of social intelligence which hopefully experience can change (though I am guessing it is a tough process). I think my bad people skills makes me come off as weak and sometimes I start seeing myself in a victim light. But thank you for your advice it is about getting along with people and handling potential difficult situations effectively. And no matter which profession I go in there will always be this factor. Now how do I get less afraid. Just take it one day at a time?

I'm wondering who exactly you're responding to. It's hard to see on some screens, but on the lower right hand corner of the post is a "quote" button. If you click on that, they the post you're responding to will precede your comments.

How do you get less afraid? It sort of goes hand in hand with deciding not to see yourself as a victim, although I couldn't tell you for sure which came first for me. I'm thinking that you're going to have a fear factor no matter what you decide to do, because almost anything you do will be different from what you're doing right now. It's normal to feel afraid of change. You just have to make up your mind that change is opportunity and step up. The more change you experience, the easier it gets. For some of us, it never gets EASY. But sometimes you just have to go for it.

My next step is retirement . . . a truly fearsome prospect for me as I've never, since I was 12, been without a job. Nor have I ever relied on anyone else to support me, and if DH wants to realize his dream and start traveling, he's going to have to support me because I'm not old enough to retire. We've worked out the budget, how much retirement income we'll each have and when we'll each be eligible to collect it -- but it's still a fearsome prospect. I'm gonna go for it anyway!

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