Irritable

[Cricketta]

I've been an RN for 9 months and am very stressed out but I'm doing pretty well. I have found myself getting extremely irritated with patients but especially family members who are sarcastic and are demanding and very condescending. I am such a wimp when they are rude until I am so fed up that I snap at them. I need some tips on how to stay professional and not get so irritable. It seems like there are some family members that just keep making little jabs about everything just to try to get a rise out of staff. I get so angry and have to constantly bite my tongue. Any suggestions? Maybe nursing just isn't right for me? I have extreme anxiety issues but I'm working on them. Maybe med surg is just not for me?

[Nurse Beth, MSN]

I have had the same experience as you in feeling irritable with patients and families- and it's not a good feeling when you're supposed to be therapeutic. Looking back I now see it was a sign of burn out and I didn't recognize it at the time. Nursing is very stressful and you are in your first year, which is even more stressful.

Anxiety and irritability are also signs of depression. And there is help for depression, so that's good news. Just some things to consider. Best wishes.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

Sounds like part of "reality shock" to me . . . what we used to call the first year of nursing.

My advice -- treat each absurd request or outrageous demand/jab/question as fodder for a funny story for an AN thread on "the worst family ever" or "outrageous demands." And then compose it in your head while they're jabbing at you -- it really quells the urge to throttle someone. The best tool you can develop is a healthy "nurse sense of humor". It makes you a better writer and more prolific poster as well.

[caliotter3]

While the encounter is happening imagine the other person in diapers waving a rattle. Anything to break your serious train of thought.

[lorenzo895]

Hi Criketta,

I'm not sure how you would feel about night shift, but one of the benefits I have found is that I have to deal with families much less. Plus there is less of the stress of day shift obligations because people aren't itching for discharge and providers aren't needing procedures done so quickly. I can't speak for you personally, but I would imagine such obligations only add to your stress. If changing your shift is not a possibility, I would just encourage you to stay strong and be reminded of the old adage that whatever won't kill you can only make you stronger (and wiser). Don't give up on nursing. You've worked hard to come this far, plus there are many different kinds nursing of work you could do...