what is the most important thing in preparing the family for nursing school

GWCCStudentRN · Apr 15, 2009

My best friend and I graduate nursing school in May. She has 3 kids under the age of 4, one of which she just gave birth to in December!

My advice to you is to prepare by informing your husband and making a mutual decision about study time. The biggest challenge for my friend was finding study time. Nursing school does not just stress you out, it will stress out your husband and kids. It takes a lot of time away from the family, but in the end benefits everyone! Its an investment in the families future!

Juggling little ones and the husband is hard, but if he can be patient and help out it makes everything much easier!

drmazur · Apr 15, 2009

Butteryfly - I don't have any advice for you, but I'm in the EXACT same situation. i start school in the Fall, and I have 3 girls - 6, 3, and 2! I know it's going to be hard, I'm planning on getting what I can done after bedtime for the kids (luckily they all go at 8), and I'm thinking of making a set number of hours i do on the weekend during the day...depending on what we have going on. I hope you start too, we can give each other advice on what works! :)

CBsMommy · Apr 15, 2009

I am not quite in nursing school yet but I have a full time job and take about 10 credit hours per semester, nursing related, such as pathophys and A&P I and II, Micro, Clinical Calc, etc. I'm a single mom to a 2 1/2 year old little boy. I am hopefully starting school this fall, GOD willing! The way that I am approaching this is a) I am going to quit my full time job, b) treat school like a full time job (i.e. lecture from 8:30 - 1 and then I will stay at the school and study until 5 every day), c) take a day out on the weekend to just spend time with my little guy doing whatever he wants, d) put him into bed by 8 every night so I can study without distraction. These have been my guidelines all along and they seem to have worked for me. Also, I try and look up the books my classes require way before the semester begins so I'm done with about half the book PRIOR to class even starting. It really does work when you want to soak in some information. Also, it helps to impress when the teacher asks who the first African American Nurse was you can answer Mary Mahoney or what did they call Florence Nightingale ("The lady with the lamp"). I'm such a nerd sometimes!

stephynic21 · Apr 15, 2009

While i don't have kids, something that my friends, family and boyfriend have had to get used to is the fact that i dont' always have time to do "the little things" anymore. Me and my best friend would have shopping trips alot of times over the weekend....we still have the occasional one, but most times i'm in the library studying on weekends. Family has "get togethers" and needs to understand that right now school has to come first. I missed my grandmothers surprise party because it just happened to fall during finals last semester, and this semester it looks like i will miss my niece's babyshower cause its during finals as well. It sucks, they hate it, i hate it more, and its so easy to blow off the school work and go but you've gotta keep telling yourself it will all be worth it and to stay focused (trust me, the one and only test in nursing school i bombed BIG time was during a weekend where i put off studying until the day before so i could have a weekend gettaway with the boyfriend). i have no advice on how to explain it to small kids, but the rest of the family needs to know that its gonna be hard for you to do all the things you used to. Oh, and they should also expect you to be stressed out and a bit moody.

FLgrad2010 · Apr 15, 2009

Good luck to you! I am finishing up my second semester of nursing school. First off, I would suggest getting any textbooks you can and start reading in the summer. I went into nursing school with no medical background, and it took a long time to catch up with others who had some experience. Knowing medical terminology is very,very helpful. As for preparing your family, no matter what you say to them, I don't think anyone will understand the actual amount of time and effort you are going to be putting in to your schooling. Whatever your husband and family can do to help you with cooking,cleaning, etc...would be good. I literally stopped cooking dinner for my family because it was taking up too much time. It was either study and do well in school, or fail but have a clean house and dinner on the table every night. You need to spend any free time you have with your kids because they won't understand why Mommy is not around as much anymore. I have two kids, ages 5 and 10, and it's been a hard adjustment for them. I have given up on a clean house until summer break and have learned to let a lot of things go. Good luck ~ Julie

butterfly135 · Apr 15, 2009

thanks for the great advice. i will make sure to put it to action. i have my interview on the 22nd of april so hopefully i will know soon if im in.

drmuzar- its nice to know that there is someone else in my situation. that would be really nice to have support of someone else who is going through the same thing.

thanks again everyone you are all wonderful

BabyLady, BSN, RN · Apr 15, 2009

Sit down with your husband and your 6-year old.

Before you start school, clean the house like you've never cleaned it before. Put about 3 months worth of soups and casseroles in the freezer for the days when you come home exhausted, or need to hibernate for a few days to study for an exam. Keep track of special days when area restaurants have specials.

Make sure the husband understands that nursing school is a full-time job...and in fact, you'll be putting in more hours than he will..along with the mental stress of managing everything on top of it.

Have a very clear list about dividing household responsibilities...this may be a major shift for him if you have always been a SAHM.

My advice is to do laundry daily....even small loads. Even if it's just one...that way you won't have mountains to do on the weekends.

The 6 year old can sort colors....make that "her" job.

Anything you can buy in bulk, get it, if you have room...this will save trips to the grocery store for toilet paper, paper towels, dishwashing detergent...things that you know you'll always need.

I make the practice of "picking up" during the week...I don't dust..I don't vacuum. So when Saturday comes, I change the sheets on everyone's bed, whether they need it or not. That way all I have to do when I get up is vacuum and dust and give the bathrooms and the kitchen a good mop and wipe down. I have a fairly large house and I can get it all done in about 3 hours.

Unless I have a major project...I never do anything on Friday's when I come home from school....and I don't do anything on Sunday's before 3:00 pm.

Do the more thorough cleaning (baseboards, etc)...save that for long weekends when you have holidays or breaks.

Be sure to post a calender so your husband knows when you have projects due, exams and when you'll be in class.

Don't sleep deprive yourself...that won't be good for anyone involved, including your schoolwork and yourself.

intuition · Apr 15, 2009

I sat down with my husband and laid it on the line. I told him he would be a single dad for 2 years (we had a 3 year old and 8 month old at the time). I explained that the house cleaning would be lowest on my priority list. I explained that I would work 2- 12 hour shifts a week, and beyond that my free time would be dedicated to studying. I asked if he would be able to handle this. I also explained that once this was done I would be bringing in a lot more money, and have a much more flexible schedule.

I am now ending my 4th semester, with my last semester starting in the beginning of May. We are still together, and still making it. I won't lie, it is very hard. Due to my stress level being higher than it has EVER been, I tend to snap much easier. I am also sleep deprived and need a vacation. My oldest begs me not to go to school or work. I try to explain to her that mommy is going to school so that I can take care of people and help them. She kind of understands, due to me working in an ER before starting school. My husband has taken to cooking dinner every night and transporting the kids to where they need to go. I devote Sunday's to being the family day. We all spend the whole day together with no studying. I also won't study until my children go to bed, I usually study from 8:30-midnight.

I hope this helps. Oh, and your house will be a disaster, but I do a full top to bottom cleaning during my breaks. I want you to know it is possible, but there is a lot of sacrifice that has to happen.

maebe · Apr 15, 2009

BabyLady made a great list. I'm just finishing my second semester and, while I don't have kids, my house has suffered anyway -- my man's not much of a cleaner! So get the house work done over the summer, get organized for school and learn to live with a bit of clutter...you can clean up over the breaks! Good luck and enjoy your free time while you've got it!

cursedandblessed · Apr 15, 2009

My family rules for nursing school.

On clinical days the hubby is in charge of supper. Buy a stack of Stouffer's family meals, get him a stack of takeout menus. Teach him how to operate the microwave.

Grocery shopping is no longer just me. Also a great learning experience for the hubby, he no longer wonders where the money went, after he loads up the buggy with little debbies, cookies, and just let him look at the price of steak, LOL.

Set up your bills on autopay through online banking at your bank. Set up balance alerts to go to your cell or the email you check everyday. Make your balance alert at least $50 more than your most expensive bill. Sock some money away if you're able to. There are banks that will put the extra change from your debit purchases into a savings account, and some that will sneak a $1 away into a savings account each time you use the debit card. Keep a change jar all summer, so you'll have some mad money. I rolled $300 at Christmas just from saving the change last year.

If you're old like me and the hubby, fill up the daily pill containers for at least a month at a time. If you're on BC pills, now might be a good time to consider a discussion with the doc to switch to the depo provera shot or another long acting form (unless contraindicated). Not that I'm against children or anything like that, but unless you've been on them for a billion years like me, nursing school is a time when you forget. Along that same line, the pills that go for a long time without having a period prevent the PMS, and that problem of white pants and heavy cycles.

Laundry is begun on Friday afternoon only, I don't care if you did want the shirt with blue stripes, you wore it, it's dirty, it's Tuesday you can wash it yourself or wear something else. Everyone has their own color basket. It's the hubby's job to tote to the bedrooms. You can put them up, or get your clothes out of the basket. (I know hard to do with little ones). Put pictures of what's in the drawer on the outside of it. Socks, Underpants, shirts, etc. By the time you start school your 3 and 6 YO should be able to dump them in the drawer, by that time you may be able to train the six year old to put the 2 YO stuff into drawers if you pay them. LOL

Kids and clothes, well let them dress themselves if they can, if it doesn't quite match, it's okay. I've also seen 5-7 day organizers where you can put their entire outfits into them for each day, if you're inclined.

That's all I can think of right now. I know I sound a bit mean, but anything I don't have to remember to do, is an extra moment I can study, or breathe.

BabyLady, BSN, RN · Apr 15, 2009

Here are some tricks if you have small children:

1. Socks...keep safety pins (large ones)...every time you take off socks, pin them together...toss in the laundry basket...that way, when you wash, they are already together.

2. Clothing...if you have a 1 year old and a two year old, this can be time consuming when sorting laundry. You can do one of two things: