I am a new grad-ish, I have been working the hospital for 6 months on a med floor. I am run ragged on a daily basis and hardly get my breaks. I know this is normal. If I get one break I consider that a success just as the other nurses do on my floor.
I got a written warning a couple months ago because of a documentation error, no patient harm. Just a bad day, so stressed I forgot to document.
I love caring for patients, hey I even had a couple cool moments with patients that made me think "Hey I have something to hold onto that makes this job worth while.'
But sometimes I feel my days are numbered at my job. At weak moments I desperately search and apply for non-hospital jobs looking for a way out. But when potential employers call, I don't respond...because by the time they do i have pepped talked myself back in staying at my job...."Just hold on for one more day..." Wilson Philips
Even though I keep my patients safe, I am just not going fast enough for management, I am expected to put up with poor staffing conditions, and abusive patients with a smile...welcome to nursing.
That's cool, I get it...the term "If you can handle the heat, get out of the kitchen!" slaps me in the face every time when I want to complain to myself about my job. Millions of nurses see the BS and they still do it. When I reflect upon my career path...lol...Scrubs some how deceptively guided me, foolish me.Too much day dreaming. Hospital nursing is like scrubs but with out the cool docs like Elliot or Turk. Just Dr.Cox with no charm and humor. Truth be told that is nursing, if you can't handle it you better get out because things are not going to change any time soon. Big fish eat little fish and keep it moving. Things move so fast, no one has time to mourn your untimely termination if it happens...on to the next one. The well of mercy in this world is desolate and barren.
I knew when i went into nursing it was not going to be easy...but I did not think it was going to be this hard and though squeezing a tear out of me is like squeezing blood out of a rock...I have a had moments on the floor in which the lump in my throat threatened to push the tears gates open. But with many deep breaths I have pulled my self together.
I want to be an ICU nurse, I know I am still very new to this game. I was elated when getting this job on the medical floor....my first step towards ICU then CRNA... I wanted to put in my years in med and serve my time but now I just want to get mine and ditch this place now that I have 6 months experience. I was willing to give them 1-2 years....but
The heat in the kitchen is hot and it is not my patients that concern me, it is management. I feel like I am a dime a dozen. If they fire me, there are a 1000 other willing applicants eager and ready to take my place. The world will un-remorsfully keep turning. Just another nurse who could not hack it. Sure they lose a little cash with the money they invested training me but they will be fine...but what about me? Start from the bottom again..?
I don't know if i will be fired but darn...I rather not wait to find out. A written warning...I have a feeling my supervisor has it out for me. She exaggerated everything in our meeting. That's fine, they got me. I take responsibility. But I don't think it needed to goto this extent. I am over medical. Documentation trumps patient care any day.
Sorry for the ramble but I need some answers...should i just start applying for ICU jobs and try and get out ASAP or try and tough it out some more and gamble not to be fired. Jumping to another medical job would be like starting at the bottom. I am okay at medical but i think with the right training I would be great in ICU. Many new grads do residency in ICU and succeed...Can't I as well with my med experience with a good icu training program?
I figure let me use this job as my leaping ground to get to ICU fast. I am not normally this cold. But I don't see why I should give my best years and energy to a place where the rewards are so few. They don't care if they suck me dry...."just work faster...harder...but go home on low census so we don't have to pay you' It does not seem like a good deal. This job is sucking me dry with no mercy. I might as well get what I can and get out with no remorse.
It is a doggy dog world in the hospital I work in.
I am going to let what you said marinate and sink in. I am a numbers gal. I look at things in terms of probability for success and wager what is worth my time. I really want to enjoy this ride I am on.
Y'all are right that I need to change my mode of thinking in terms of this write up and management breathing down my neck.
I am still employed and have the means to turn things in my favor. I can still have a good time. It does not have to be drudgery. I will stick it out and wont fear termination. Just give my best and not worry about it anymore.
But I still stand by my convictions on this profession. the good and the bad.
I have been a Med/Surg nurse for 8 mo now and up until the end of my 6 mo probation mark, I felt everyday going in to work would be the day that something disastrous would happen that would end up getting me fired, I never felt that what I did was good enough. Now that fear is less and my confidence is growing everyday, but I think that fear is good to have because that is what keeps pts safe. I started out in one hospital and the nurse to pt ratio was horrible, you had no less than 6 pts and you could take on 7 or 8 pts at a time if they were short staffed. There were only 2-3 aides for 45 pts, and they had a couple of LPNs in the mix that also had a full pt assignment, so we had to do all their assessments and IV meds for them! Most of the RNs were so busy they could not help you if you asked, managers would not help you, charge nurse had her own assignment as well, the "nurses aides" felt like they should be the ones getting offered help all day long, ironic...- I left that floor before my orientation was over and I went to a different hospital and I am so glad I did, I get 4-5 pts, 4 aides for 35 pts, lots of teamwork, CN does not have an assignment and is helpful. Yes sticking it out would be ideal to get that 1 yr in, but if you feel they have it out for you , they might. At the first hospital I was at they had it out for me and I hated it there so I left. At the first hospital I was told I was not nice, not helpful, by my preceptor,who just, you know, was passing on the "gossip" of the aides, very immature little girl- I felt like I was being talked to by a person from a different planet because I really am so overly nice-often told I am too nice, and very helpful, which I am told now on a daily basis at my current job. It may just be the floor you are on and the environment of the floor, created by the nurses, that is the problem. Most of the RNs on the floor I started on had similar crap personalities to each other, which was probably a reflection of the poor manager because she hired them and they all stayed there for a reason, given the horrible conditions. If you could you should pick up shifts on other units and see how you fit in there and see how the environment is different because it really could be a whole different world somewhere else. I would not stay and suffer if you are able to switch units, maybe you may not feel ready for ICU just yet but perhaps you could go to another med/surg unit.
I also want to become a CRNA and I can see that being difficult because 1) there are just a few programs offered in the state, all over 2 hours away 2) I would have to quit my job and go fulltime which would mean I have to save 2 yrs worth of living expenses plus school expenses 3) I am having a kid now, yikes , so I can see why 50 percent are men- they may not have families to tie themselves down and can go to school. Ideally I would have waited to start a family until my masters was earned but that was not in the grand plan I guess. And it is true, while many women would not like to think it is true, men in nursing get treated better, it is studied in psychology in many professions where men are "token" men, they are less than 10 percent of the profession, yet are paid more and advance more quickly despite their experience and education and this happens in all fields where women are dominant in number. Sex discrimination still exists, there is a glass ceiling, women are still paid 75 cents to the dollar a man is paid. Why dont nurses advocate for themselves to better their position? I think women as a group are just non-confrontational, women that strive to be in positions of power I think often have to gain the mentality "If you cant beat them join them" when it comes to working among men, who are the majority and have men's best interests in mind.
I agree with you on many of the things you said, I love helping people, more often than not they are not appreciative of it or not coherent enough to appreciate it, but I am not a martyr either. I know I am mentally capable of more than being a med/surg nurse and I do not want to settle for this for the rest of my life, if I can get more education and make more money, why shouldn't I? I think you deserve to strive for whatever you want and you will achieve it because you want to, if there is a will there is a way. Do not let others who have fallen into a rut and are bitter about it dissuade you from getting what you want. This is my favorite quote by Mark Twain“Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you, too, can become great.”
You see, that is why management and floor nurses can never be friends. It is the approach management takes. It is never two sided story...always one sided. Where the nurse is treated like the criminal and has to defend herself. Management never asks them selves what they are doing wrong to make these situations come to play.
If you say that...then you are just quickening your fast departure. One girl I used to work with was very vocal about management and the poor staffing conditions. She is an awesome nurse and worked as a nurse for many years. She was new to my place of work...suffice to say she did not pass the probationary period and she was let go.
What-evs. Things are not going to change.
But you are not at work to make friends. You are there to work. I dare say that if you "forgot" to document in the ICU, or in the OR as a CRNA, that could have grave patient consequences, and you perhaps would be let go.
Alas, you are missing the point. You really need to have a firm foundation of basic clincal skillsets, and proper time managment to have a shot at a specialty. The way to get that is with a good backround in med/surg and even the ER.
It seems like you are venting over a profession that is not what you expected it to be. It is a one sided story if only one side has proof that is not subjective. But that is the same with any profession, and not exclusive to nursing. Management can only guide you and set up rules on how they want the unit to run. Otherwise, your nursing practice and character is up to you.
Don't lose sight of the fact that the patient is the priority. Unless you are going into management *which BTW is a worthy option when you are passionately committed to radical change perhaps you should look into a MSN in nurse management* then the role of the staff nurse is not to run the show. We are employees and not providers. Upper managment hires middle management, who directs the staff. Do not personalize your job. All this "victim" talk is when a lightbulb needs to go off--your work life and your personal life are 2 seperate things. That someone reported you here, said this there, it should be your mantra to be non-contributory to the goal of safe effective patient care.
As quoted on AN often "No one can make your feel inferior without your consent"
If you want to shake things up and there is poor staffing, ineffective care, then do something about it on an alternate level. Become a union delegate, know your union contract. Ask if you can create a project and focus on a master staffing plan to be presented to nurse leadership. Ask if you can become part of a shared governance. Groom yourself into a leader.
This is why nursing will never change. There are nurses who have found a way to justify the abuse they receive so they can live with themselves. It's okay I get it. I would not want anyone bursting my bubble if it was my life line... I guess I would have to find a reason to show up to work every day, and have no prospects of doing something better. When I worked in retail...it was the same...
Floor nursing is a dead end. I am not worried because I never had the intention of staying long term. Life is to short to live under someone else for my daily bread.
Hey, telling the truth about what nursing really is is not being a victim, that is just another way for telling people who complain about the injustice in the nursing profession to shut up. Good one. It's a cop out instead of getting real. You all know the BS, but rather keep your heads in the sand? Good luck with that....That is why nursing will never change.
Like I said before 'the truth is a bitter pill to swallow' and some people will do whatever they can not to swallow. But you will eventually.
Floor nursing is tough. There is so much role stress/role ambiguity that, if not managed effectively, threatens to overwhelm the nurse and contribute to burn out. You have to make the experience of nursing your own if you are going to survive in that environment.
What helped me to learn how to effectively manage the expectations of patients, their loved ones, my managers, myself, was to specialize. In a specialty (infusion in my case), role ambiguity is minimal, at least in my experience. Patients know what I am there to do and generally do not expect me to be all things to all people. On the rare occasion that I get a request that is not within my area of responsibility, it has been great practice for learning how to respectfully and professionally set limits- something that on the floor, can be very difficult to do.
I'm going back to the ED soon, and I feel much more equipped to set limits and manage expectations, and to take more control over what the experience is like for me.
It took getting away from the acute care environment and into a specialty with a narrowly defined role for me to be able to see the forest for the trees, to see the bigger picture, and I'm really grateful for that.
The floor is not a dead end job unless you make it that way (yes, I have worked the acute care floor). The floor offers tremendous opportunity for growth, for learning, and to become an expert in your practice. If the approval and recognition of others is your yardstick for that, then of course you will be disappointed. You have to measure your own success with your own internal yardstick.
The healthcare system is a mess and modern nursing is a mess- you don't have to be a smarty pants to see it. But if you let that dictate your experience of nursing rather than taking control of your own experience, then you only have yourself to blame. Don't be a victim. Take charge.
Take your breaks. Learn how to say "No". Don't work off the clock. When you don't set these reasonable limits for yourself, then blame external influences like "management", you are the one inflicting injustice upon yourself.
Floor nursing is tough. There is so much role stress/role ambiguity that, if not managed effectively, threatens to overwhelm the nurse and contribute to burn out. You have to make the experience of nursing your own if you are going to survive in that environment.
What helped me to learn how to effectively manage the expectations of patients, their loved ones, my managers, myself, was to specialize. In a specialty (infusion in my case), role ambiguity is minimal, at least in my experience. Patients know what I am there to do and generally do not expect me to be all things to all people. On the rare occasion that I get a request that is not within my area of responsibility, it has been great practice for learning how to respectfully and professionally set limits- something that on the floor, can be very difficult to do.
I'm going back to the ED soon, and I feel much more equipped to set limits and manage expectations, and to take more control over what the experience is like for me.
It took getting away from the acute care environment and into a specialty with a narrowly defined role for me to be able to see the forest for the trees, to see the bigger picture, and I'm really grateful for that.
The floor is not a dead end job unless you make it that way (yes, I have worked the acute care floor). The floor offers tremendous opportunity for growth, for learning, and to become an expert in your practice. If the approval and recognition of others is your yardstick for that, then of course you will be disappointed. You have to measure your own success with your own internal yardstick.
The healthcare system is a mess and modern nursing is a mess- you don't have to be a smarty pants to see it. But if you let that dictate your experience of nursing rather than taking control of your own experience, then you only have yourself to blame. Don't be a victim. Take charge.
Take your breaks. Learn how to say "No". Don't work off the clock. When you don't set these reasonable limits for yourself, then blame external influences like "management", you are the one inflicting injustice upon yourself.
This is why nursing will never change. There are nurses who have found a way to justify the abuse they receive so they can live with themselves. It's okay I get it. I would not want anyone bursting my bubble if it was my life line... I guess I would have to find a reason to show up to work every day, and have no prospects of doing something better. When I worked in retail...it was the same...
Floor nursing is a dead end. I am not worried because I never had the intention of staying long term. Life is to short to live under someone else for my daily bread.
Hey, telling the truth about what nursing really is is not being a victim, that is just another way for telling people who complain about the injustice in the nursing profession to shut up. Good one. It's a cop out instead of getting real. You all know the BS, but rather keep your heads in the sand? Good luck with that....That is why nursing will never change.
Like I said before 'the truth is a bitter pill to swallow' and some people will do whatever they can not to swallow. But you will eventually.
You have been a nurse for 6 months. You have but scratched the surface of nursing. You have but just started working "for real"--unless this is your second occupation and you have been full time employed.
You can choose to be a victim or a leader. You can choose to be passive/aggressive or make changes in your enviroment.
Nursing doesn't hold the exclusive rights to spending large amounts of tuition money and it is not what one expects it to be. Ask any teacher.
Methinks that with a bucket load of nurses in your family, you would have heard that it is not easy. Just as life is not easy. Interpersonal relationships outside of childhood, college, and family are tough to navigate.
I do take offense to the fact that you believe me to be "abused" in some way. In my opinion, that downplays those who are truly abused and believe themselves to have no choice. We all have choices. i have spent a great deal of time and energy to create change in my multiple year career in health care. As have many, many nurses.
Seemingly, it is as if no one wants to come out of college, get their feet wet, learn what they need to and specialize. Most would prefer to get to the top and have no clue. But who cares, right? We are only talking about patients here. They will surely be impressed with a higher degreed person taking care of them. Or one can leave the actual "care" part to someone else.
People drown in their degrees if they have not a clue how to swim.
Do you even remember what you originally seemed distressed about OP? Because I don't. I think, based on your posts, that you are an over-thinker like me. I have to stop and focus my thoughts because I am planning 10 years down the line in addition to every possible scenario that could happen today. I think stopping and focusing on your current position and what you can do to improve yourself now will help you. Sure, you may be leaving for another job in 6 months, but that is 6 months from now. What are you going to do tomorrow to make yourself a better nurse, to learn something new, to help your patients?
It could be totally unjust what the OP was upset about.
I remember when I had a five patient load. One was first case OHS on heparin and nitro gtts with an unstable plaque. The Nurse Educator had to go home at 5pm, so she dropped off the teaching packet and asked me to do it (fortunately, I loved OHS teaching, but at the same time, I didn't know where I was going to find the time to do it). I had another patient, a redhead with a sheath in who ended up rebleeding. I had a CHF patient on a Lasix gtt. I had a preop abdominal surgery the next day, and I had a post PCI patient whose sheath has been removed on the previous shift but who still had the sandbag on and needed ambulation.
So, I had a bunch of stuff due at the same time, and my CNAs were prioritizing emptying garbages over ambulating patients. Literally, I asked my CNA to ambulate the post PCI patient, and she said "I can't right now, I'm emptying garbages."
I made the judgment call that the Miralax on the abdominal patient could be given late.
I could have documented that I gave it on time, but I didn't. I documented the time I actually gave it, which was about 2 hours late.
As a result, I had the "senior nurse mentor" dogging my steps for the next several weeks. I even met with our NM, who told me point blank "You should have been able to handle that assignment". I got no quarter. I totally could have lied about the admin time of the Miralax and avoided whole the thing, but I didn't because I have integrity.
My point is that there is so much pressure on the floor to get everything done on time and it's not necessarily humanly possible.
In my case, my sense of personal integrity did not allow me to lie about what I had been able to accomplish, but it did land me in a tough spot.
As much as I advocate to take your breaks, say no, and don't work off the clock, I understand why nurses do. I don't know of many other professions that put up with this. However I maintain that your own personal sense of ethics and integrity should be your guide, no matter what.
GreenApplesauce
44 Posts
Thanks LadyFree28,
I am going to let what you said marinate and sink in. I am a numbers gal. I look at things in terms of probability for success and wager what is worth my time. I really want to enjoy this ride I am on.
Y'all are right that I need to change my mode of thinking in terms of this write up and management breathing down my neck.
I am still employed and have the means to turn things in my favor. I can still have a good time. It does not have to be drudgery. I will stick it out and wont fear termination. Just give my best and not worry about it anymore.
But I still stand by my convictions on this profession. the good and the bad.