I have patient gown dyslexia

Published

Even after 14 years of nursing, I still get confused by patient gowns. What idiot came up with such a confusing design? I have to figure it out each time how to get the correct snaps to line up. The hardest part of nursing is patient gowns. Figuring out all the doodads on wheelchairs also makes me look like an idiot.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Utilization Management.

i've learned to step away from the stretcher when the transporter brings an admit--because i'll hit the wrong pedal and send the thing to the floor instead of putting the brakes on.

i've decided that the gown is designed to humiliate the patient into staying in bed.

what do you think, gd?

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Hey, me, too, Garden Dove. Some days, when I'm tired or real busy, it seems to take me forever to get the thing snapped so the head's coming out the head hole and the arms through the arm holes. :uhoh3:

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I would agree. Any patient who gets out of bed with only a patient gown must not be of sound mind. It's actually a great assessment tool, don't you think?

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Utilization Management.
I would agree. Any patient who gets out of bed with only a patient gown must not be of sound mind. It's actually a great assessment tool, don't you think?

Yes, I agree. The patients who tie it all up and manage a closed back, some even figure out how to make a robe out of a second gown by putting it on backwards--those are either a/o X 3, or very confused retired seamstresses, who will Houdini themselves out of every restraint ever made.

The patients who give up on the things and wear sweats or shorts on the bottoms are usually guys who want to wander the halls and see how busy we really are.

The patients who refuse to wear the gowns and bring their own frilly, pretty stuff will be prepped for an EGD/colonoscopy during their stay, and you cannot convince them that there are simply not enough pairs of underwear in the world to cover that experience.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Those are the little old ladies who present to the ER with a positive suitcase sign. They come prepared with spare panties and pantie pads, their make up, frilly gown and plush robe, plus, naturally their own meds.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

The same ones who figure out the mysterious workings of the bedside table vanity. That always impresses me when they do that!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Maternal - Child Health.

I agree that patient gowns should be part of a Mensa eligibility test. Along with newborn wrap-around T-shirts, the ones with ties instead of snaps.

I started in the NICU as a new grad and had no trouble with vents, art lines, IV pumps, or any other high-tech item. It was the d**m T-shirts that got me every time. My hubby used to ask me if it worried parents that their baby's nurse couldn't figure out how to dress their child. I have to guess the answer was "Yes!"

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Lie detection.
even after 14 years of nursing, i still get confused by patient gowns. what idiot came up with such a confusing design? i have to figure it out each time how to get the correct snaps to line up. the hardest part of nursing is patient gowns. figuring out all the doodads on wheelchairs also makes me look like an idiot.

well i'm an idiot too. i like gowns with no snaps, snaps drive me crazy. there's always one more snap then there should be left over. oh what to do with the extra snap?

the same ones who figure out the mysterious workings of the bedside table vanity. that always impresses me when they do that!

lol, i think i was into my 2nd or 3rd year of nursing before i even realized there was that little "secret" compartment there.

i agree that patient gowns should be part of a mensa eligibility test. along with newborn wrap-around t-shirts, the ones with ties instead of snaps.

oh those wrap arounds! i feel so much better now. i always felt like such a moron!

[color=#483d8b]

[color=#483d8b]ok you guys made me laugh and now i really feel ok when i don't know the complete inner workings of pt. clothing, wheelchairs,walkers,etc. :specs: .

[color=#483d8b]

[color=#483d8b]

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Nephrology, Cardiology, ER, ICU.

Along the same line, I have a new grandchild (my first). Those little sleepsuit thingies with all the snaps - there is always one left over! How does that happen???

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Telemetry/Med Surg.

OMG..I thought I was the only one! Hate those snaps. I work tele and then to bring more insult, I have to thread the heart monitor through the stupid hole in the front and then into the front pocket only to find either the hole or the pocket is somehow is too small for the monitor. :stone

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Med/Surg, Perinatal, Float.

I always ask my pt if they brought their own jammies to wear and that they don't have to wear ours if they don't want to. Many do wear thier own and I think it is beneficial to be more comfortable and for the nurse to see the pt as more of an individual than a 'pt'. Of course if they are going to a procedure or have messy wounds, etc then our gowns should be worn.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion