I hate night shift, need some advice :(

Nurses General Nursing

Published

Hi Everyone,

I know this topic has been discussed on allnurses in the past but I feel that I need to let out my feelings and am looking for some advice. I started my position in an ICU in NYC on straight nights 7p-7:30a and have been doing it for 1 year and 3 months so far. Before this job I only worked days (1yr med surg and 1 yr stepdown) I always wanted to be in the ICU so I decided to make the sacrifice for night shift in another hospital and lost my seniority.

Nurses that have made the switch from nights to days on my unit have put their time in. I'm talking like 5yrs on average. People on days don't leave my unit unless they retire or move away. I LOVE my unit, my co-workers, manager etc. but don't know that I have it in me mentally, emotionally and physically to wait.it.out. for day shift.

VENT ALERT:

The hardest thing for me working night shift is that I deeply miss my husband. He is so supportive of me and I am so lucky for that but I miss him so much that I am so sad and cry most of the day before the first night I am back on duty. When I work 3 nights in a row, I don't see him at all for those 3 days. The nights we are together I have caught myself crying when he falls asleep before me because to me, its a reminder of how night shift is keeping me awake and keeping me away from having a normal life. I have a 4am crisis on the nights that I work, like what am I doing with my life, is there no other option? Nights have also made me feel so socially isolated. I barely see my friends or family anymore. Not to mention I always feel tired and guilty if I get the sleep I actually need, like I'm struggling to keep up with the rest of the world in the normalcy of daylight but losing sleep because of it. I find I tend to forget things more often. Overall, I feel depressed.

OOF. Sorry guys.

So as I see it right now, my options ARE:

1. Wait to get on day shift...

2. In my hospital we have a critical care float pool. I could gain seniority on days in the float pool and then apply for a position in my unit if it opens up. But the thing IS, whenever someone goes from nights to days on my unit there is never a position posted online. Its like it gets posted and immediately taken down, like the nurse talks to the manager and then she posts it and the person applies and gets it right away. I feel that someone who "stuck it out" in my unit on nights would get it before me... (Am I making ANY sense???)

3. Leaving the hospital to try to find a day position which is basically impossible for ICU in the NYC metro area.

Can anyone offer some advice. And, if you made it through this rant, thank you.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Psych (25 years), Medical (15 years).
I have a 4am crisis on the nights that I work, like what am I doing with my life, is there no other option? Nights have also made me feel so socially isolated. I barely see my friends or family anymore. Not to mention I always feel tired and guilty if I get the sleep I actually need, like I'm struggling to keep up with the rest of the world in the normalcy of daylight but losing sleep because of it. I find I tend to forget things more often. Overall, I feel depressed.

No need to apologize,chocolateistheanswer. Trying to juggle a night work schedule with a day life is a terribly stressful situation.

It's not abnormal to experience a "4am crisis", as it is theorized that serotonin levels can be lowest round the middle of a regular sleep schedule. Lower serotonin levels equal increase susceptibility to symptoms of depression.

Even though I have changed my circadian cycle to a completely night schedule, I too sometimes experience agitation, feelings of vulnerability, sensitivity and the like around 4 am. My mantra at times like this is: "These are your feelings​. They are not reality. This too, will pass." By 5 or 6 am, I am back to my old positive self. (heh!)

Changing my schedule to being awake at night whether working or not has greatly improved my situation. However, it sounds as though this night schedule is a transitional one for you, chocolateistheanswer. Perhaps for this interim, to the best of your ability, you too could change your circadian cycle to a basically night schedule, seeing the light as the end of the tunnel as an inspiration to endeavor for a "regular" schedule.

Having a supportive spouse is gold, so it's really great that your husband is empathetic to your situation. My wife, Belinda, is also a nurse who works Med/Surg on a night schedule, so we are very supportive of one another.

Good luck in your endeavors, chocolateistheanswer.

Oh and BTW: Chocolate is an answer! Once again, it is theorized that chocolate stimulates serotonin production, decreasing symptoms of depression.

Dark chocolate. Not just milk chocolate.

The best to you!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

"Overall, I feel depressed. " The fact is , you cannot adjust to night shift and you and your family are suffering. NO job is worth that. You are so exhausted right now you cannot think clearly.. but

you have MANY options.

You could start by taking the float pool position. Make it clear to your manager that you absolutely need a day shift position, stay in contact on a regular basis to remind them.

Do whatever it takes to get off nights. This is your life we talking about here.

Best of luck, let us know how it's going.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
"Overall, I feel depressed. " The fact is , you cannot adjust to night shift and you and your family are suffering. NO job is worth that. You are so exhausted right now you cannot think clearly.. but

you have MANY options.

You could start by taking the float pool position. Make it clear to your manager that you absolutely need a day shift position, stay in contact on a regular basis to remind them.

Do whatever it takes to get off nights. This is your life we talking about here.

Best of luck, let us know how it's going.

Yeah, I tend to agree with her answer. I mean, missing your spouse a little bit is common, and missing out on some social things here and there, but the degree of your depression and anxiety and just overall unhappiness here is just not worth it. Normally I'd give someone strategies to work through it, but honestly, in this case, it seems like night shift is just really not compatible with you and is doing some serious harm to you emotionally, and in the long run that's going to set you up for some bad things.

Family first, friends second, job third...maybe. Job comes like, 4th or 5th for me. ;)

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Hospice.

Night shifter, here ... And I agree with the above posters. After more than a year, no one can say you didn't give it a serious effort. Go for the float pool.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Davey Do,

Thank you so much for responding to my post. The 4am thing makes sense. I will try to acknowledge that what I am experiencing are feelings and not my actual self.

However, I know that switching my circadian cycle to nights would not help me personally. I can't fathom staying awake at night when I am home and my husband is sleeping and would feel like I am "missing out" on life when I think about all the day time activities going on while I am sleeping every day.

Thanks again for your help. I really appreciate all the input I can get. And yes, chocolate usually is the answer :)

Up Vote Up Vote ×
"Overall, I feel depressed. " The fact is , you cannot adjust to night shift and you and your family are suffering. NO job is worth that. You are so exhausted right now you cannot think clearly.. but

you have MANY options.

You could start by taking the float pool position. Make it clear to your manager that you absolutely need a day shift position, stay in contact on a regular basis to remind them.

Do whatever it takes to get off nights. This is your life we talking about here.

Best of luck, let us know how it's going.

Thanks Been there, done that. I told myself I would try this for 2 years to get my feet wet in the ICU- to learn critical care concepts etc. and to give me a good foundation if I wanted to transfer. I will talk to my manager again about my desire for day shift. My only concern with the float pool is at some point I would love to go back to my unit for day shift. But my fear is that if I leave that I will no longer be considered for a spot on day shift because they would take someone on night shift who stayed before me.

I have a lot to think about, but thank you so much for your support and input.

Up Vote Up Vote ×

If your original plan was to stick it out for 2 years, give it another year. That way you meet your goal and gain important experience. In the meantime, start looking for another job. Maybe not in NYC, but somewhere that you could commute to with relative ease.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in NICU, Telephone Triage.

I feel your pain. On the other hand, when I was a new graduate I did my time on nights for 7 years and just dealt with it. I think most hospitals have similar requirements about working nights first before getting day shift. You can always look around at different hospitals or home care for day shift if you can't cope with it. Good luck!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Add a Comment