I feel incomplete

Published

Okay I'm currently 21 years old. I graduated high school in 2013 I took a year and a half off from college I always planned on going but wanted to take some time off and then decided Jan 2015 to do the nursing program at a technical college but before you do there lpn program you have to take 9 prerequisite classes including a cna class and it's very mandatory you get your cna first. And I was suppose to be in the cna class for fall semester 2016 and then do the lpn program spring 2017. But there cna class is full they only allow 14 people in the class a semester. So I'm taking cna classes around where I stay for $1,095. And just decided to not do there lpn program I decided to go to a university that's literally 15 mins from my moms house and live with her and do their adn nursing program for spring 2017 and go back for my bachelors and while I'm in the adn program I would very much like to work as a cna. But as of right now I just feel lik I wasted 2 years of my life going to this technical college because that could've been my adn nursing degree right there. I also feel left out and like a failure because the people that I graduated high school with are gonna be graduating college may 2017 there gonna have there degrees and I don't have mine yet. I don't know how to not feel this way. I have a plan and I believe no I know I can do this I just feel like my life won't be complete and I won't be really truly happy until I become a pediatric nurse. I just wish I didn't waste my time at that technical college I was literally going there for 2 years just to do there cna certificate program when that program can be done in 6 weeks. I just hope things look up for me and I feel really bummed that it's about to be 4 years and I don't have anything I feel like a failure. I graduated high school at 17 didn't start technical college until early 19 and I'm currently 21 and I feel like that's time I wasted that I will never get back.

Okay I'm currently 21 years old. I graduated high school in 2013 I took a year and a half off from college I always planned on going but wanted to take some time off and then decided Jan 2015 to do the nursing program at a technical college but before you do there lpn program you have to take 9 prerequisite classes including a cna class and it's very mandatory you get your cna first. And I was suppose to be in the cna class for fall semester 2016 and then do the lpn program spring 2017. But there cna class is full they only allow 14 people in the class a semester. So I'm taking cna classes around where I stay for $1,095. And just decided to not do there lpn program I decided to go to a university that's literally 15 mins from my moms house and live with her and do their adn nursing program for spring 2017 and go back for my bachelors and while I'm in the adn program I would very much like to work as a cna. But as of right now I just feel lik I wasted 2 years of my life going to this technical college because that could've been my adn nursing degree right there. I also feel left out and like a failure because the people that I graduated high school with are gonna be graduating college may 2017 there gonna have there degrees and I don't have mine yet. I don't know how to not feel this way. I have a plan and I believe no I know I can do this I just feel like my life won't be complete and I won't be really truly happy until I become a pediatric nurse. I just wish I didn't waste my time at that technical college I was literally going there for 2 years just to do there cna certificate program when that program can be done in 6 weeks. I just hope things look up for me and I feel really bummed that it's about to be 4 years and I don't have anything I feel like a failure. I graduated high school at 17 didn't start technical college until early 19 and I'm currently 21 and I feel like that's time I wasted that I will never get back.

I can definitely relate to how you feel. I have beat myself up over it time and time again. Life happened all in between for me. However, you cannot dwell on the past because that gets you nowhere in life, like ever. You are still young and have that plan in place. Follow it and stay the course! I remember going to school the first time. Took me 4 1/2 to 5 yrs to complete a non-nursing degree, only to be out for 3 years and still working as a CNA at my local hospital. Here I am now, getting ready to go back to school for the first time in 3 years for my LPN.

For only being 21, you seem to have a great head on your shoulders and focused on your goals. I definitely wish I could say the same for myself at 21, was too busy partying, going out, and not staying focused. Not to mention the crap ton of debt I am in and having to pay that back. Keep your head up, stay focused, and continue to make school your priority with the end goal in mind!! Please don't get so down on yourself because life is all about living and learning. At the end of your day, you are your biggest competition. And BTW, I'm 26 as well! ;) Ill be rooting for you as well!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I agree with the other posters that dwelling on past mistakes is entirely unproductive. Just move forward. Many of your future classmates will be much older than you. There is no one "correct" path to a goal.

You may not realize it, but you have already taken a very important step in achieving success. You have set "SMART" goals. SMART goals are:

  • Specific.
  • Measurable.
  • Attainable.
  • Relevant.
  • Time Bound.

Now that you have set these goals, spend as much time working on them as you can. Make it your full time "job" to take methodical steps toward achieving them.

The other thing I would suggest to you would be to start working on your writing skills immediately. Many university programs will require you to write an essay as part of the admission process. ADN programs, and especially BSN programs, will include requirements for writing research papers. Many classes involve essay exams. There is a grammar section on the HESI exam that you must pass. As a nurse, your notes are considered legal documents and could be used in a lawsuit someday. Your written communication skills will make an impression on others. You want that impression to be positive. Get a grammar book that comes with a workbook so that you can practice and test yourself. Make sure you understand the proper use of words such as there, their, they're, and your vs. you're. Bone up on when it is appropriate to use he/him, she/her, we/us, and I/me. You don't have to write like Hemingway in order to be a nurse, but your writing should be grammatically correct, clear, and concise.

There are web sites that have exercises so that you can practice. You will have gen ed requirements in your degree plan. Consider taking a writing class. All of these will come in handy no matter what profession you ultimately pursue.

Good luck. You can do this.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Med/Surg, IMC, ICU.

Not everyone gets their degree in 4 years. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that!!

I have definitely felt how you felt. I saw all my peers surpassing me. It made me feel useless and like I wasted so much time. I slowly came to learn to each his/her own. We will all get to where we need and are meant to be on our own time. Just make sure you have goals and a game plan. Sometimes things don't always go as planned. It's okay. Take what you can learn from a situation and move on.

I was 20 when I decided nursing is the way I wanted to go. I moved from Hawaii to Las Vegas in 2012. My plan was to be done in 3-4 years. I thought everything was going as I wanted, especially since I was accepted into my nursing program in 2013. However, I failed out and was a complete wreck. It took me 2 years to be re-accepted. I wanted to give up and go home. Instead I stuck it out and became a CNA. Now I am 25 and have one more year left in my program! I can't wait for it to be over!

Good luck to you! Be resilient and don't pay attention to what others are doing. :)

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Educator.

You are just getting started and in five years you will look back and wonder why you were so worried about what everyone else is doing. We all chart our own course and there is no magic number or age of when you have to reach your goal. I am over 50, recently got my BSN and now in graduate school. People ask me 'why now?' I reply 'why not?'

You learn and grow in and out of school, so never look at that time as 'wasted.'

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I am on the same boat as you, except that I am already 23y/o this year. But i am not giving up, not after I read all these encouraging posts in this thread! Don't give up!!! We can do this!! :up:

Up Vote Up Vote ×

Don't be so hard on yourself. The fact that you're even seeking to further your education is something to be very proud of! I wish I had that ambition when I was 21. I'm in the same boat myself. I'm 26 and haven't even applied to a nursing program, I will be in the fall of 2017. The original program I was going to apply to (pathologist assistant) was changed to a masters program and the nursing program at the community college had similar pre requirements. I get down on myself because I can't go to school full time just yet. I've been a student since 2013 and I'm still not even close to being done. Comparing yourself to others is going to upset you more and really isn't necessary to do. Everyone has a different path and story. There's these ladies that are in my classes that I talk to a lot that are applying the same time I am that are in their 40s! I think it's awesome to see all walks of life working together.

Just keep chugging along and you WILL get there and it'll be so worth it.

Good luck to you! :)

Up Vote Up Vote ×

I agree with the sentiments already posted. You know the saying "It ain't over till you're dead"? Well, that's exactly right! I'm 35 and going back to school for nursing after 11 years in a very lucrative career that I nonetheless loathe and find no purpose in doing. If all goes according to plan, I'll be starting the upper division just after my 37th birthday and will cross the BSN finish line at 39. I think at 21 I probably would have felt that 35 was WAY too old to be starting school for a new career (because anything over 30 feels old when you're 21!) But I certainly don't agree with that now. I have plenty of energy and stamina for college, so I know you do, too!

I also agree with the posters who warned against comparing yourself to others. One of my favorite C.S. Lewis quotes: "Comparison is the thief of joy."

I would also second what Horseshoe advised about getting some practice on writing skills. It's okay to need some remediation in a few areas before applying for school, but do put in the time to improve those areas. I myself went through a lot of math review on khanacademy.org and YouTube tutorials before taking any assessment testing so I wouldn't have to take any remedials, so I know what it's like to need work on a specific area. Writing ability is big aspect in nursing. I've worked in the legal field for 11 years and nursing notes are often submitted as evidence in a lawsuit, and believe me, attorneys are good at spinning that stuff around even when the nurse was clear and thorough. The ADN program in my area even states on their website that that they look at an applicant's score specifically in Composition I along with the science classes in order to determine entrance rankings.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Neuro.

If you compare yourself to others you're never going to feel complete. Seriously life is a journey & sometimes taking a longer route makes your accomplishment sweeter. It took me 3 major changes & 7, yes I said SEVEN years to get my bachelors degree in a completely unrelated major. Worked as an officer for 3 years & found myself feeling the tug to go back to school for nursing...my initial major right out of high school. I'm now waitlisted for nursing school at 32 years old. You know what though, I regret nothing, I could beat myself up for not "sticking with it", I could do the whole "I wasted so much time, could've been a nurse a decade ago" but what good does that do? I feel more focused than ever & if you really want this, you will too. Chin up, you think this is a huge deal now, 10 years from now you'll wonder why the heck you worried so much & took things so seriously. You're young, enjoy the journey!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

OP, it is definitely not too late for you at 21! I understand the feeling though. I graduated nursing school at 29 and am now getting my BSN (7 classes to go!). We had children and started a family before either me or my husband went to college. I just look at it as we did things in a different order. We worked our butts off to support our family as we put ourselves through school.

Anyways, not to drone on about myself, but I just wanted to encourage you and tell you to stop looking back and just look forward now. If you want this, you can and will do it!

Up Vote Up Vote ×
Specializes in Family Clinic.

You aren't alone and you certainly haven't wasted your time. Hindsight is 20/20. Just do the best you can to keep pushing forward!

Up Vote Up Vote ×

The saying, "It's not a sprint, it's marathon," applies here. At end, you will be the same age whether you are a nurse or not, and I take it you'd rather be that age and a nurse.

By the way, I am 42 and in a BSN program. It took me three and a half years to do prereqs, but now I'm headed where I want to go.

Up Vote Up Vote ×
+ Join the Discussion