How to work with nurses that don't smile or talk

TheCommuter, BSN, RN · Mar 15, 2015

I don't smile or talk much. In general, it has nothing to do with the people around me and everything to do with my personality. I am reserved and not very talkative.

Since I am an introverted person who doesn't derive the greatest amount of pleasure from mingling with new people, I usually feel uncomfortable when I am forced to assume the role of a preceptor or trainer of students or new hires. Again, this has nothing to do with the student and everything to do with me.

There are nurses out there who enjoy taking students and new hires under their wings. I think schools and workplaces should place students and new hires with people who actually want to fill this important role.

Good luck to you!

Editorial Team / Admin · Mar 15, 2015

You mentioned that it's usually the younger nurses. Is it possible that they are also newer and still working out their own routine in caring for patients and learning their jobs? Try to keep an open mind, and realize that not everyone is a social butterfly, especially at work. Only you can control how you react to interactions with other people.

nurseprnRN, BSN, RN · Mar 15, 2015

I'm currently doing my first ward placement and as a student, you are allocated to a nurse everyday, but sure you do have your own patient load. So here is the thing, whenever I work with nurses that don't smile or to talk to me (often the younger ones), I would be extremely nervous and always wonder if I did something wrong or screwed something up. I also tend to forget tiny details and cannot answer simple questions (like 20 divided by 15 times 4) or remember what they just taught me. However when I work with nurses that would chat and laugh my performance is a lot better and I am even able to take care of all my patients independently and assist my nurse for some time-consuming tasks.
For those who share the same feeling, how do you guys cope with this?

I try to remember what Dr Phil famously says: Most people would be astonished to learn how little others think about them at all.

It's so not about you all the time. If you think that you can only work well with pleasant people, you're going to spend a lot of time worrying. Trust me, if somebody thinks you're screwing up and need to be told, you'll know.

caliotter3 · Mar 15, 2015

Treat them with the same courtesy and respect that you would treat others. You can't force them to be chatty if they do not want to be. Be glad that they are not giving you a headache and stress with incessant chatter and gossip that does nothing to help with the job.

HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD · Mar 16, 2015

Agree with GrnTea - & Dr Phil..... One of the hardest lessons of maturity is learning that we're not actually the center of the universe. The way people around us behave & perform their jobs? It doesn't have anything to do with us. If they're a chatty cathy or grumplestiltskin, it's most likely just their natural way of being.

Patient care is not a generally an appropriate place for a continuous stream of happy chatter. To echo PPs, it's a complex job that requires a high level of focus and engagement. Patients and their families frequently need quiet time to process and reflect on the changes they are experiencing.

My advice? Try to become more comfortable with a bit more air in the conversation.