How do I get out?

[KalipsoRed21, BSN, RN]

I have been a nurse a decade now. I've done telemetry, med surg, travel nursing, ER, and currently I'm coordinating home infusion for patients. I admit I have wanted out almost as soon as I started. I kept thinking if I found the right specialty that it would get better, but I'm plain just tired of trying. I've worked for tons of hospital systems, good and really, really bad. Overall nurses everywhere are over worked, given ****** shifts, ****** benefits, and the worst work life balances ever. I use to love people, and want to help, but the verbal abuse, the lack of staff and training so that I have to see people abused by the health system over, and over again. I've given up time with the most important people in my life to make a difference, and all I see is that I'm wasting time on a system that is just going in the dumps and mistreating people. I give up, my time and my life are more important than this stupid career that gives nothing back. I've tried to make the best out of this career, I've tried to find a place in it that allows me to have the necessary time with my family to replenish my soul before going back to hell, but it just isn't working anymore. I just want to cry all the time now because I'm so stuck and I'm so angry. There isn't a day since I've started as a nurse that I haven't felt like a dunce for believing in getting a degree and wanting to "do something important". No one understands expect for other nurses. I would rather take a job as a cashier than continue in this career. In fact I have tried to get a job at my local grocery store, but they won't hire me because I'm "over qualified." I'm so trapped.

[oldcrone]

1. So sorry to read this - I truly believe 99% of nurses have been in this dark place at one point (or many, many points) in our careers. You are not alone. 2.I have been here (still there - I think sometimes). 3. Sounds like you are in intense settings - have you ever tried less intense nursing? Granted - there is no such thing as a stress - free nursing job. They are always going to try and squeeze as much labor as they can from you (especially since nursing are the most expense part of the "labor" budget) - but there are different kinds of stress. For example, home health, MD office (if you can find it), hospice, school RN (people do not realize how busy and stressful this can be - just a heads up to really do some lunch interviews with nurses IN THE SCHOOL DISTRICT you plan to apply = the districts are very, very different from each other - and you get all holidays paid - including 6-9 weeks in summer), telemed/triage.... things that are more M-F 9-5 = so you can have a life. The pay is lower than hospital RN - but you are trading money for time and a "different" kind of stress that may be more manageable. You are still using your nursing skills - in many areas more than if you were in hospital = why these positions do not generally hire "new" nurses. 4. Do you have a life? Sincerely asking this question. Especially with hospital nursing/12 hours shift = very easy to no keep up with friends, have hobbies, outside interest - really what makes life worth living. It is way too easy for us to work - come home - stay home and not live outside of work. Do you have an outlet to pursue other things? Are you solely defining yourself as a "nurse"? Hope this helps, and remember therapy is not a bad thing = the amount of stress and BS we put up with would wear down the most resilient person. Best wishes.

[NotMyProblem MSN, ASN, BSN, MSN, LPN, RN]

You are not stuck. It's like that person believed to be drowning when all he or she has to do is stand up. Years ago, I started living below my means. I did an assessment (that's one of the very first things that we nurses do: assess) of my household and made a list of things that I wanted and compared that to what I really needed...I mean really, TRULY needed. Once I eliminated the majority of those wants, I was able to drop down to 1-2 days per week, and some weeks, I didn't even go in at all. It was great! The PRN positions didn't come with benefits, but today's healthcare system did not make provisions for a completely healthy 'mature' individual, anyway. Premiums were high and the deductibles for my age group were in excess of $6K. If I had to ever use the policy that I did have, I would still have to pay out of pocket due to never meeting the deductible as long as I remained healthy. So, that was one of the things that I let go...it was of no benefit to me at all. It was no problem, though, because with only working one or two days a week, I was able to take even better care of myself than before, because I had the time.

Think about it this way: what would you do if you were fired? Answer: you'd sleep in the next morning. When you get up, you'd probably spend quality time with those who have been deprived of so much of your time. If you want to get a job at store somewhere, don't tell them that you're a nurse. If the job may ask for transcripts, don't tell them that you've been to college. If your current employer will allow, tell them that you need to go part time or PRN due to personal reasons and make do with what you have.

You are not stuck in nursing; no one is. It's all about taking that leap of faith and not being afraid of the unknown anymore. It is being done every day. Your priorities are your own. Live with it, deal with it, and most importantly, be happy with it.

You have to make up your mind that you really DO want out of nursing and are willing to do whatever it takes to get out and stay out until your situation or mind changes...much like your ambition with getting into it. Family, home, and freedom means the world to me as well, and I will not allow ANYONE to tell me that I cannot have either one...especially if the person doing the talking is in the position to drop me at little or no notice. We only live one...might as well be happy while we're here. Good luck and take care...

[Been there,done that, ASN, RN]

Take the energy spent on anger, use it on a plan.

You have MANY skills, that qualify you for MANY opportunites. Market yourself to where you want to be.

[BSNbeauty, BSN, RN]

Try a different specialty ?

[caliotter3]

Figure out what you would rather do, then make the change, or just plain quit, or take the gradual way out by going more and more part time. You can get out using any of these approaches.