Hello, everyone. I'm brand new to this forum and I just got hired to start a home health hospice job in the middle of June. I have neither home health experience nor hospice experience. I did bedside hospital nursing for 14 years and just could do it no longer. I imagine that holding hands and listening will be a big part of what I can offer to my patients and their families, but what about God? How far can you go in comforting your patients and their loved-ones? If they are afraid of dying and you know you have good news for them, just how much can you say?
Thanks and I'm glad to be a part of this great forum. I look forward to getting to know all of you and making some friends.
Specializes in Hospice, Palliative Care, Gero, dementia.
One of the things I was really impressed with during my palliative care fellowship was the chaplains and the chaplain fellows. Their fellowship was so much harder than ours! None of us were all call as they were (and they didn't even have a good place to sleep), it seemed like they were always doing midterms or finals, they regularly gave each other extensive feedback and had to do a lot of self-reflection about what they did/said/responded. Their approach was that they were the only tool they had, so they had to know it well.
In our city we have monthly all-city palliative care meetings, with different people presenting. The chaplain fellows did one presentation and they managed to videotape different faith leaders: a rabbi, a Buddhist teacher, a minister, and a Muslim Imam, asking them about their religion's beliefs about death, dying, and rituals and practices around death and dying. It was such a wonderful example of inclusivity--particularly letting people speak for themselves.
miriam
I know our chaplains have facilitated services/rituals for wiccans, native americans, Buddhists, Jews, Muslims...probably a taoist as well and it has all been a matter of meeting people where they are. Also, our quarterly memorial services include readings from various faiths -- really beautiful.
I've appreciated when I've read notes about their insight about our patients -- their sources of strength, their understating of their struggles, their providing the "prayer of presence" (which I think nurses do too, often, even if we don't use those terms).
As a post-holocaust Jew, I've been raised to have a certain amount of suspicion of Christianity -- the fear that we're a good "catch" to be converted. The chaplains I've been blessed to be around have been sterling examples of what it means, truly to be a good Christian. Of course, I don't live in the bible belt (although I might wind up there) that's a whole other kettle of fish!
I absolutely understand your original question.:loveya:
I believe that any Christian that was witnessing the death of someone who is struggling with their spiritual beliefs would wonder how best to handle it. Your heart absolutely would want to throw them a "life-preserver".
I work in OB and have witnessed couples who are not believers and have just lost a baby, grieving. I so longed to offer them the comfort of Jesus, but knew that it would be inappropriate so I prayed silently then and there for Him to show me what to do. Then a song that I hadn't heard in months came to mind, that says, "You don't always have to have all the answers. Just love them like Jesus." I decided that that is what I would do then and always in those situations. Just like someone else said, be an example of His perfect love and compassion and let Him do the rest.
BTW, I am glad to see some apologies on this thread. Seems Christianity is one of the few things left that is unacceptable to claim...
BTW, I am glad to see some apologies on this thread. Seems Christianity is one of the few things left that is unacceptable to claim...
I don't think anyone here has suggested there is anything wrong with a nurse being a Christian -- just that it is not appropriate or acceptable to force one's personal beliefs on our clients.
BTW, I am glad to see some apologies on this thread. Seems Christianity is one of the few things left that is unacceptable to claim...
As a Christian whose faith is the undergirding of years of social justice work and activism--and as one who lived outside the US in a country so "new" to itself because only in the last few years has this country been out from the HUGE influence of Colonialism and Imperialism--the US being the last of the Imperialism, I've seen, up close and personal, a really ugly side of the US--AND a very ugly side of the Christianity of US Imperialism--even though both my husband and I were there as Xan missioners.
Yes, well, there IS a piece of the truth (as Gandhi said) about Xanity being "unacceptable" in the light of the atrocities of Western Xianity particularly in light of the past nearly 8 years of a very violent theocracy. In the US, it seems that we've taken it for granted that "we" were/are Christian and in parts of the US, a one way of being Xan. When I think of the present conflict within Anglicanism (for example), I think that so much of what is being called "traditional" Xanity (by the Bible etc etc etc) was literally forced on peoples all over the world by Xan missionaries. I won't go on and on about eons of bad, wrong, misinterpreted, horribly translated via culture and power that is, at least for me, THE primary reason Xianity is considered so "unacceptable." In my lifetime, "bad" Xianity has been used to defend racism, sexism, heterosexism, murder, torture, death penalty, economic injustice...from the Civil Rights years to the Black Muslim movement to Vietnam to chemical mega agriculture, the oil industry, to immigration rights to the atrocities of US intervention in Latin America, to GLBTQKQ rights, to 9-11 and the aftermath of war, and on and on... that's a whole lot of baggage and intolerance all under the name of a masculine Christian G/god.
I think it really shows a sensitivity and awareness for those of who are ARE Xan to be respectful of other cultures and other faith traditions. And to that hospice using the language of different faith traditions in the world today as a way to connect to families, patients/clients, and the rest of the world, I give you great HURRAHS!! And for all of us Xan to make ourselves aware of other faith tradition ways and days of celebration and sacred days--says that we really DO honor a Holy One who loves All. I don't know about any of the rest of you, but Christianity is my "way" into paganism and Earth/environmental activism.
Please, to the hospice chaplains comfortable enough to "do" memorial services and life celebrations of other faith traditions, I send a great big THANK YOU!
BTW, I am glad to see some apologies on this thread. Seems Christianity is one of the few things left that is unacceptable to claim...
As a Christian whose faith is the undergirding of years of social justice work and activism--and as one who lived outside the US in a country so "new" to itself because only in the last few years has this country been out from the HUGE influence of Colonialism and Imperialism--the US being the last of the Imperialism, I've seen, up close and personal, a really ugly side of the US--AND a very ugly side of the Christianity of US Imperialism--even though both my husband and I were there as Xan missioners.
Yes, well, there IS a piece of the truth (as Gandhi said) about Xanity being "unacceptable" in the light of the atrocities of Western Xianity particularly in light of the past nearly 8 years of a very violent theocracy. In the US, it seems that we've taken it for granted that "we" were/are Christian and in parts of the US, a one way of being Xan. When I think of the present conflict within Anglicanism (for example), I think that so much of what is being called "traditional" Xanity (by the Bible etc etc etc) was literally forced on peoples all over the world by Xan missionaries. I won't go on and on about eons of bad, wrong, misinterpreted, horribly translated via culture and power that is, at least for me, THE primary reason Xianity is considered so "unacceptable." In my lifetime, "bad" Xianity has been used to defend racism, sexism, heterosexism, murder, torture, death penalty, economic injustice...from the Civil Rights years to the Black Muslim movement to Vietnam to chemical mega agriculture, the oil industry, to immigration rights to the atrocities of US intervention in Latin America, to GLBTQKQ rights, to 9-11 and the aftermath of war, and on and on... that's a whole lot of baggage and intolerance all under the name of a masculine Christian G/god.
I think it really shows a sensitivity and awareness for those of who are ARE Xan to be respectful of other cultures and other faith traditions. And to that hospice using the language of different faith traditions in the world today as a way to connect to families, patients/clients, and the rest of the world, I give you great HURRAHS!! And for all of us Xan to make ourselves aware of other faith tradition ways and days of celebration and sacred days--says that we really DO honor a Holy One who loves All. I don't know about any of the rest of you, but Christianity is my "way" into paganism and Earth/environmental activism.
Please, to the hospice chaplains comfortable enough to "do" memorial services and life celebrations of other faith traditions, I send a great big THANK YOU!
My job is to do active listening and be alert for the layered meanings in what they are saying. I might give a non-committal response such as "I have imagined what heaven might look like....sounds like you've been thinking about this....(pause for them to say more and if they do not, extend an invitation) "what's on your mind about heaven and hell today?"
Specializes in ICU,HOME HEALTH, HOSPICE, HEALTH ED.
Gardener--you do deserve to be welcomed with open arms into this intense and beautiful work. Be prepared...the experiences..the journeys...the moments you will witness in this work will change you forever. Good luck. Be prepared for growing pains..we all experience them in the beginning of our work in hospice.
marachne
349 Posts
One of the things I was really impressed with during my palliative care fellowship was the chaplains and the chaplain fellows. Their fellowship was so much harder than ours! None of us were all call as they were (and they didn't even have a good place to sleep), it seemed like they were always doing midterms or finals, they regularly gave each other extensive feedback and had to do a lot of self-reflection about what they did/said/responded. Their approach was that they were the only tool they had, so they had to know it well.
In our city we have monthly all-city palliative care meetings, with different people presenting. The chaplain fellows did one presentation and they managed to videotape different faith leaders: a rabbi, a Buddhist teacher, a minister, and a Muslim Imam, asking them about their religion's beliefs about death, dying, and rituals and practices around death and dying. It was such a wonderful example of inclusivity--particularly letting people speak for themselves.
miriam
I know our chaplains have facilitated services/rituals for wiccans, native americans, Buddhists, Jews, Muslims...probably a taoist as well and it has all been a matter of meeting people where they are. Also, our quarterly memorial services include readings from various faiths -- really beautiful.
I've appreciated when I've read notes about their insight about our patients -- their sources of strength, their understating of their struggles, their providing the "prayer of presence" (which I think nurses do too, often, even if we don't use those terms).
As a post-holocaust Jew, I've been raised to have a certain amount of suspicion of Christianity -- the fear that we're a good "catch" to be converted. The chaplains I've been blessed to be around have been sterling examples of what it means, truly to be a good Christian. Of course, I don't live in the bible belt (although I might wind up there) that's a whole other kettle of fish!