hostile ex-mother-in law being admitted

[llisdog]

Hello...I really need some informaton regarding the following matter. Five yers ago I left a very hostile relationship after 10 years. There were two children involved and my ex was very hostile and angry. Domestic abuse was an issue. After court proceedings I had full custody of the children. He appealed and I still retained full custody. His family was very angry, deceitful and full of hate. It has now been five years and for the benefit of the children there father and I do get along and attempt to do what is best.. The problem now is my DNS just called to inform me the my ex-mother-in-aw will be admitted to the facilty that I have worked at for 3 years. According to my DNS she has said very negative, nasty things about me. Needless to say I will not be taking care of her. I work the night shift with another RN...We all work together as a team, as this is only a 70 bed facilty.. I am concerned about nursing liabilty issues. Also, this women is so nasty, I have no doubt she would attempt to get me fired. One of the issues I know that she told about was regarding my then 16 year old a suicide attempt over 10 years ago, and a one time DUI I had over 5 years ago that both the judge involved in my custody case was a aware of and also the local nursing board was aware as I told them...I know this is very long..but I am very proud of my nursing professoinalism and my rasing of my children. This is a very small community and this women's slanderous words may in the line of gossip be taken as real, and I worry about my standing as a RN. The DNS has assred me she has spoken with this women and she agrees to no longer gossip.. She also has an issue with one of the RA's working at the facility so there will be no contact with this worker. I really do not know how to handle this. I have no doubt I can be professional but I am concerned about legal issues. And as I do not know what terrible things she did say I feel very uncomfortable..Please advise?

[imenid37]

I agree w/ Baglady. I would tell admin. I had to do a post-partum home visit for a psycho ex-boyfriend's wife. She was a nice lady. She had no problem w/ her care. He left the house when he saw me and his totally psycho mom called several times during the visit. The husband's name was listed with his middle name as his first name, otherwise, I would have never gone on the visit. I told the home care director, after the visit, so there would be no misunderstanding about what had gone on.

[pagandeva2000, LPN]

Baglady took the words right out of my mouth. I too have been in this situation with an Office doc who wanted me to become her nurse. I already was handling two other Docs. So the Office Doc went to the board and slandered my reputation, (or tried), the other board members were aware of my ehtics and hard work and pretty much told her too grow up. BUT, I did write a letter to HR that the purported statements have led me to believe DR. so &so may slander my career and I want in writing that I will nver be assigned to work with her. The administration took the lttr to their lawyer and I got what I asked for. She still came around me and tried to hold conversations with the Docs I was working with I'm sure to distract me. Sorry to ramble, but I agree, stay away and cover your butt. Good luck to you!

What the heck was wrong with this woman who decided to report you to the board because you won't work with her??? Insane!! You did the right thing. Seems like this woman was obsessive.:angryfire

[pagandeva2000, LPN]

At least, your DNS warned you ahead of time. This seems to me that she does support her nurses. I would do as others have mentioned. Ignore her, have nothing to do with her care under any circumstances. I'd even ask for a temporary transfer to another floor while she is there. This woman may even overhear you communicating something that is totally irrelevant to her care and misconsrue it to be something else. Good luck!

[rnmomtobe2010]

I also wouldnt go near her room. If you have to cover for the other RN for lunch, let the LPN or CNA answer the call light. If for some unknown reason you must go in, and i mean only if she is coding, dont go alone and dont leave anyone in there with her alone. At least stand outside the door so more than one person can hear what is being said. Cover yourself.

I totally agree. :angryfiresome people ought to be ashamed of themselves. Some peeps are always trying to make trouble for others just because they are bitter and/or unhappy. Burns me up!

[squeakykitty]

I may be late in replying but avoid her if possible, keep a journal of incidents, document everything, and possibly have 2 people in the room at all times for care. She could cause trouble for any of the workers if she doesn't like something.

[ktwlpn, LPN]

Stay away from her---far,far away..It's a shame that your DON did not refuse the admit.It's pretty clear that she is manipulative -she's got 2 staff members that have to avoid her from the get-go.Just wait until she has been there for a few days and starts manipulating the cna's.I work in a 9 unit facility so it is easy to avoid a problem but it will not be as easy for you..Make sure if you have to come into contact with her you have a witness....Good luck.My ex-husband was often a patient at our small local community hospital when I worked there but it always seemed to happen when I had a few days off (the Grace of God,I believe)