Hi everyone. I really need your help as I am so distraught and dont really know what to do anymore. I am a married mom of 5 and I have finally achieved my lifelong dream of becoming an RN. I graduated 8 months ago and applied for several jobs with no luck.
Anyway, in July I was hired as a home care nurse working nights and caring for a young boy in his home. At first it was going well, but over time the boys mother has been unbearable. She is terribly rude to me and for no apparent reason. I have bent over backwards to help her out, including moving around hours to take her and her son to a NFL game. I have purchased flowers for the boy to give his mom, and even purchased a personalized jersey as a christmas gift to her son. I have taken their dog out in the middle of the night and cleaned up the floors when she goes in the house. All of this and much more without even a thank you!! Did I mention that my husband fixed her car for free because we felt bad and have huge hearts?
Anyway, lately this woman has treated me like dirt. She is constantly giving me dirty looks and slamming doors. Her son called me "slow" the other night and she did not say a word. I looked at him and said that was not nice, and she completely flew off the handle saying that she is going to start locking the doors and that I need to learn my role. She screams at me so loud I shake. I went into the bathroom and took a few deep breaths to gather myself. When I walked back out I asked her if I could speak to her and she asked me what I wanted. I asked her if I am doing something wrong that she is not communicating to me and she began screaming again telling me that if I dont like it then there is the door. She said that I let her son get away with **** that he wouldnt be getting away with with her or she would knock his head off! Huh??? I'm sorry but what does she really want me to do?
hen she continued to say that she doesnt want me playing around with her son and that I am his nurse and nothing more. If I were to write everything I have been through then I would be here forever. She is also always screaming and telling me that she is my boss and that she gets bills from the insurance company for 6000 dollars for 10 day periods and she thinks it is crazy. Well, she is getting an RN in her home up to 7 days a week for 9 hours each night. She acts like I am responsible. Sometimes I feel like standing my ground because I am a grown woman and I have never in my whole life been treated this way! I feel like my hands are tied because I have had no luck finding anything else and I do have 5 children.
Please give me some advice! I have talked to my boss about this repeatedly but she just says that she knows because she had dealt with her before...but the agency has no other RN cases open. This is not what I wanted in nursing and now I dread going to work. Please help!
You can use the smoking as your way "out". I would visit my doctor with respiratory complaints and come back to the employer with instructions from your physician to get away from the smoke. That way, your employer can not screw you over when you put in the claim for unemployment. Good luck.
Its too bad that the desk people in the agency can't work a shift there. They need to wake up and smell the coffee. Its a shame that nurses have to put up with abuse. I feel its like the workhouse in previous centuries.put up with abuse or no job. Go to college so you can be abused.
Update!! I got thrown out of her house last night! This is what happened: The boy got his head phones stuck in his cpap mask so I was trying to untangle it. While I thought his mom was asleep, suddenly I hear her yelling at him to sit the (obscenity) up. I turned around to explain that I was trying to untangle his ear phones and she began screaming at me saying she wasn't talking to me she was talking to her son....this went on for several minutes and included many harsh obscenities. She then went in her room and slammed her door. I then couldn't hold it back anymore and began crying from the stress and she came back out of her bedroom and saw me. She then proceeded to scream at me again and she said I was child for crying. I told her this was abuse and she proceeded to tell me to get out of her bleeping house. As I was gathering my things she called the agency and said she is relieving the nurse immediately. On the way home I about had a nervous break down. I had to call my husband to talk me through the 45 minute drive as I was shaking and so stressed. Anyway, I just got off the phone with my boss and she was understanding....again, she has dealt with this woman in the past. I am left with feelings of being taken advantage of because if the agency knew how she was then why in the world would they put me in that situation? I have come to realize that while I have 5 kids to support, no money is worth the mental anguish I have dealt with. I will get through until something else comes along!
Update!! I got thrown out of her house last night! This is what happened: The boy got his head phones stuck in his cpap mask so I was trying to untangle it. While I thought his mom was asleep suddenly I hear her yelling at him to sit the (obscenity) up. I turned around to explain that I was trying to untangle his ear phones and she began screaming at me saying she wasn't talking to me she was talking to her son....this went on for several minutes and included many harsh obscenities. She then went in her room and slammed her door. I then couldn't hold it back anymore and began crying from the stress and she came back out of her bedroom and saw me. She then proceeded to scream at me again and she said I was child for crying. I told her this was abuse and she proceeded to tell me to get out of her bleeping house. As I was gathering my things she called the agency and said she is relieving the nurse immediately. On the way home I about had a nervous break down. I had to call my husband to talk me through the 45 minute drive as I was shaking and so stressed. Anyway, I just got off the phone with my boss and she was understanding....again, she has dealt with this woman in the past. I am left with feelings of being taken advantage of because if the agency knew how she was then why in the world would they put me in that situation? I have come to realize that while I have 5 kids to support, no money is worth the mental anguish I have dealt with. I will get through until something else comes along![/quote']
Yes, call cps. No child should have to put up with that. In the future, be careful how you talk to the parent. The parent can lie to the agency about what you said and they will believe the parent over you. You sound like a great person and if I had a child in my home, I'd be grateful for someone like you. You deserve a better environment. If you go for unemployment, use the words "hostile work environment". Those words will help. Good luck finding a new case/work! Someone will appreciate you!
I absolutely agree with the child abuse...all has been relayed to my boss. I have said all along that if he is on cpap at night and o2 during the day, why is it ok for 3 adults to be smoking arounf him? And he sleeps in the living room of a very small apartment so it is not like he can really escape it at all.
I absolutely agree with the child abuse...all has been relayed to my boss. I have said all along that if he is on cpap at night and o2 during the day why is it ok for 3 adults to be smoking arounf him? And he sleeps in the living room of a very small apartment so it is not like he can really escape it at all.[/quote']
Notify the equip company. It's against most DME companies policies to put o2 in a home where people smoke. And if the cpap is rented, the smoke can cause damage to the equip and the equip company won't be happy about that! That mom needs to have some consequences for her behavior.
I didnt realize the client was on O2. Thisn is SO dangerous. The agency should refuse to staff.Dont forget you are a mandated reporter. You should call CPS yourself.
caliotter3
38,333 Posts
You can use the smoking as your way "out". I would visit my doctor with respiratory complaints and come back to the employer with instructions from your physician to get away from the smoke. That way, your employer can not screw you over when you put in the claim for unemployment. Good luck.