help. They don't like me.

[nevertelling]

I am an RN on a busy surgical floor. I have been at this job for almost a year now. I love being a nurse.

However, not too long ago I got written up at work. A patient complained about me. My manager gave me the feedback that my coworkers percieve me me as overwhelmed and that I always seem stressed out.

I admit, I am stressed out sometimes. Probably more often than not. But I want to perceived as caring and competent.

I don't know what to change. I don't think I even realize what I'm doing.

Honestly, I've never had many friends, always been picked on/unpopular. Is there something unlikable about me?

I know it might be hard to respond to this question... I m not even sure what the question is? Anyone experience something similar?

Do I maybe need to work in a less stressful environment?

Just feeling lost and like a failure

[MrChicagoRN, RN]

It's great that you are asking yourself these questions. Call your employee assistance program offered through work.

Free, confidential, and a good first step

Good luck.

[Ruby Vee, BSN]

ARE you overwhelmed and stressed out? It wouldn't be unusual for a new nurse. The fact that your colleagues perceive you as being overwhelmed and stressed out does not necessarily mean that they don't like you. But it's good that you're doing some self-examination. Perhaps you could, as the previous poster suggested, benefit from some counseling. It may help!

[HouTx, BSN, MSN, EdD]

Agree with Ruby - Feedback isn't worth anything unless it is honest. You need to learn to take it in the spirit it is offered. When someone tells you about something that you need to improve - whether it's about your job performance, that skirt that really does not look good on you or the fact that you have spinach in your teeth - it's important to understand that they're telling you this because they care about you. Srsly. If they didn't give a flip, they would just keep quiet and let you continue heading down the wrong path.

[Swellz]

I just got through my first year as a nurse and can relate. I struggled to adjust throughout this entire year, and I'm also not the most social butterfly. If I were you, I would focus on your work. It is easy to be overwhelmed in our position. The trick is managing the stress and asking for help if you need it. If you are struggling to handle the stress, maybe talking to someone about strategies isn't a bad idea.

I can also give you a tip. SMILE. Seriously. I got a lot of feedback that I always looked stressed, and actually noticed that people were asking me if I was okay a lot. Apparently my face always looks like I am going to cry, whether I feel like it or not. So now I smile gratuitously. Attitude helps.