Help Quit New Grad ICU Job

Nurses General Nursing

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Hi guys!

I am freaking out. I ended up getting a dream unit fresh out of nursing school. I was working on the neuro ICU at the only level one trauma center in the area since January and emailed them today to say I wouldn't be returning. I ultimately feel relieved, but I wonder if I messed up my future goals of becoming a CRNA. Most days I would cry before going or think about going or wish I would crash my car while heading to work (not trying to be dramatic either). I do not regret it seeing as I was unhappy. I loved ICU but the people and my preceptor were all catty. They made me feel stupid and unwelcomed. I had an old nurse tell me "You shouldn't feel overwhelmed, you have easy patients" Week two of orientation when I stated I was overwhelmed bc she would leave me alone for 20-30 minutes each hour to socialize, one of which my patient was crashing!!!. They also were only giving me 8 weeks orientation out of the 12 I was promised.

The only regret I have is messing up the ties I had with this academic health care system.
My ultimate goal is to be a CRNA so the ICU is where I need to be. I have applied to other ICUs in the area but I don't know what to say without sounding like I am attacking this healthcare system. Honestly, I would of stayed and transferred units but I could not make it there another 3 months (you must work 6 in unit before applying to others). I called HR and they stated that it is a possibility that other units would hire me but it might be harder seeing as I left without a two week. I honestly don't have a question. More so looking for support and opinions from fellow nurses and nurses that may have been in this situation.

I should also state I moved four hours away from home 1. To work at this hospital that is affiliated with the university I would like to attend for grad school 2. to make sure I enjoyed the city before committing to a three year program 3. for the experience (new grads seldom get into ICU at the hospitals I live around back home.

HELP. I don't know what to do. Should I stay and try to apply to more places or move back home.

If your on the rehire list at the hospital you left, try to go back there and work on the med-surg unit. Your information is probably still in the system. It wasn't the whole hospital you had a problem with, it was the unit you were on. Some positions can make you feel like bailing but you have to stay somewhere at some point, and long enough to get some experience. I left place during my orientation. I went to HR and asked the director if I left, would I be rehired? I did this because I was threatened by my bosses boss that I would not be rehirable if I left. I went to HR with my boss to figure out why I would not be rehirable. I did my work, was good to the patients, had no complaints, my boss didn't want me to leave, so why should be not be allowed to be rehired? At that time in my life I was working on my BSN and it was not a good time to be switching jobs but I was miserable at the place and knew it was not a good fit. If I could do it over again. I would have stayed at the previous place to finish school. Well the HR director said I could come back. When you are in a panic to leave a place you have to think of the longterm results. I would seriously call the hospital back and try to explain the situation. The hospital already invested so much money in your training. Maybe they may consider putting you on another unit.

3 Votes
4 hours ago, Workitinurfava said:

If your on the rehire list at the hospital you left, try to go back there and work on the med-surg unit. Your information is probably still in the system. It wasn't the whole hospital you had a problem with, it was the unit you were on. Some positions can make you feel like bailing but you have to stay somewhere at some point, and long enough to get some experience. I left place during my orientation. I went to HR and asked the director if I left, would I be rehired? I did this because I was threatened by my bosses boss that I would not be rehirable if I left. I went to HR with my boss to figure out why I would not be rehirable. I did my work, was good to the patients, had no complaints, my boss didn't want me to leave, so why should be not be allowed to be rehired? At that time in my life I was working on my BSN and it was not a good time to be switching jobs but I was miserable at the place and knew it was not a good fit. If I could do it over again. I would have stayed at the previous place to finish school. Well the HR director said I could come back. When you are in a panic to leave a place you have to think of the longterm results. I would seriously call the hospital back and try to explain the situation. The hospital already invested so much money in your training. Maybe they may consider putting you on another unit.

While your situation was ideal, I don't know if it would be realistic for most people.

When you reapply, there's a 99% chance that the new hiring manager will reach out to the old hiring manager to get their honest opinion about you. If the old manager tells the new manager, "This person seemed nice enough, but peaced out with no warning or explanation," the applicant is going to seem like a huge flight risk. Training a new grad costs a ton of money, and the new manager may be very hesitant to hire someone if they worry that they quit again during or soon after orientation (especially if they applicant didn't make a Herculean effort to remedy the situation first).

There's no harm in trying to reapply, but the OP may not have such an easy time getting rehired.

One bright side I hadn't thought of is that many hospitals have a probation period for your first few months; during that time, you can be fired without cause, but you can also quit without needing to give notice. That may prevent the OP from being marked 'ineligible for rehire.' It still doesn't un-burn bridges with management, though.

58 minutes ago, adventure_rn said:

While your situation was ideal, I don't know if it would be realistic for most people.

When you reapply, there's a 99% chance that the new hiring manager will reach out to the old hiring manager to get their honest opinion about you. If the old manager tells the new manager, "This person seemed nice enough, but peaced out with no warning or explanation," the applicant is going to seem like a huge flight risk. Training a new grad costs a ton of money, and the new manager may be very hesitant to hire someone if they worry that they quit again during or soon after orientation (especially if they applicant didn't make a Herculean effort to remedy the situation first).

There's no harm in trying to reapply, but the OP may not have such an easy time getting rehired.

One bright side I hadn't thought of is that many hospitals have a probation period for your first few months; during that time, you can be fired without cause, but you can also quit without needing to give notice. That may prevent the OP from being marked 'ineligible for rehire.' It still doesn't un-burn bridges with management, though.

At this point, what does she have to lose? She is currently without a job and the hospital she left is a major hospital system. I think it is worth it to try and remedy the situation.

This is what you say in interviews, you tell the interviewer that one of your strengths is being honest with yourself. Your patients' lives mattered more than your pride, you realized you were in a higher acuity situation than your new grad status should be and you made the decision to amicably walk away.

3 Votes

Definitely not coming from experience in the nursing field, as I am a new grad and haven't had this situation before... But coming from somebody who picked nursing as a second career and has experienced similar situations..

You should have resigned the appropriate way, with a resignation that offered enough notice to facilitate staffing needs. With that being said, it's time to move on from this job and look at it as a learning experience. It's tough when the chemistry doesn't match, and it's something that we all run into... Keep applying for ICU jobs, and hell if you have to work in another department than so be it! I've spoken to quite a few recruiters for a local CRNA program "that's my path right now" and although they require a minimum amount of time in critical care, they also are looking for total nursing experience... So, get back on the floor and get working!

Keep your head up and continue to stride forward =).

Specializes in PICU.

Yike OP:

I do think there may have been a better way to handle the situation. ICU is not for everyone, and while the idea of working as a CRNA may be appealing, you need some strong ICU experience.

Hard to say if this will affect your ability to get into a CRNA school.

Some people are just catty. I don't think you can avoid that as some people just like to talk. Your preceptor may have left you for 20 mintues because she/he felt you were capable and was wanting to give you space and independence in developing your ICU skill. Most preceptors are VERY over protective of giving up control of their patient. Most preceptors I know find that they need to step away and let the RN figure things out at a certain point. If you felt you still needed someone at your side, you need to speak up. - case point. I was about two thirds done with my orientation and had not had a consistant preceptor. I finally had enough and voiced my concern. "I have not had any consistency with preceptors. I want to have consistency for the remaining time" Guess what - For the remaining 15 shifts I had consistency. For two weeks I had one person, another a week and a half another and the remaining 5 shifts my last preceptor. This would not have happened had I not spoken up.

You may need to try somewhere outside your hospital system as I believe you may have burned that bridge, especially resigning by email. It is often hard to advocate for ourselves and what we need. Think about what type of unit makes you happy, you will be going there 3 - 4 days a week and long hours. What unit makes you happy? What kind of job beside CRNA would you like? There is no rush for any job. We all work at our professional destination at our own speed.

Good Luck in your future and in your next job. You can do it.

I'm going to put a positive, albeit long, spin on this. There are a lot of lessons to be learned here, and will hopefully prepare you for your next job.

Lesson One: Dealing with conflict appropriately.

Not every nurse is cut out to be a preceptor. I'm so sorry that yours seemed to be absent. As the new kid on the block, it can be very intimidating to address this directly to your preceptor, especially if they've proven to be unapproachable. Unfortunately unit managers have no idea if there's a problem unless the orienting nurse speaks to them about it. If this ever happens again, go directly to the manager and explain the problems you're having. I wouldn't phrase it in words that place all the blame on the preceptor as that could be taken the wrong way. But simply saying, I'm having a lot of trouble adjusting, I feel very overwhelmed. XYZ happened yesterday and I really didn't feel like I had the right tools or resources to deal with it. A good manager would've assigned you to another preceptor. A mediocre one may have addressed the issue with the preceptor and hoped for the best. If the issue is not resolved, then it's appropriate to speak with the manager and talk about the possibility of transferring to another unit, even though your six month requirement has not been met. Most managers would rather have a new grad admit that they're not happy there early on and try to help facilitate a transfer, than dump six months of training into them only to have them take off the second their required time is up. And in lieu of all of that, two weeks notice is really the most appropriate thing to do. If you felt like you were making a choice between your own mental health and rehire eligibility, that's fine, I totally understand and agree with it. But just understand that decision does come with consequences you have to live with. You may or may not be eligible for rehire at this hospital. Call HR and ask so you don't have to wonder. If the answer is 'no', then you'll need to move on and don't look back. Decision has been made, can't unring this bell.

Lesson Two: Pace Yourself.

Obviously jumping straight into an ICU, especially at a level 1 trauama, as a new grad was not the right choice for you. Yes, you could have had a better preceptor, but honestly critical care can be so overwhelming, even to experienced nurses, that even with a rockstar preceptor you may not have adjusted well. Consider a smaller hospital with a medical ICU or even a step-down unit. I'm a huge advocate for working on med-surg floors before stepping foot in an ICU or ED. Having a year or two to establish some foundational nursing skills, learning prioritization and time-management is so helpful. Being able to learn in an environment where patients are more stable is a little less terrifying. I got a job in an ICU after spending a year on a surgical trauma floor and I was overwhelmed for the first six months. But for my experience and the development of necessary coping skills during my first year, I would never have survived those first six months in my ICU, and I had two amazing preceptors.

Lesson Three: Goals are important, but don't let them get in your way

If your goal is to be a CRNA, that's great. It's wonderful, really. But remember, it's just a goal. You are not going to get there overnight. Athletes with the goal of going to the olympics don't get there overnight. Such a goal requires time, work, dedication, and most importantly: patience. You can't skip a few steps towards that goal and expect to reach it. Put some time into a step-down or med-surg floor and learn the basics. Don't focus so much on your goal that you forget yourself.

Lesson Four: Self First, Always

Nursing is a physically, emotionally, and spiritually demanding profession. You can't be expected to take care of others if you're not taking care of yourself. It sounds simple, but I feel like those of us who gravitate towards nursing are generally the people who will cut off our own arms in order to help others. Case in point, I got so many UTIs the first few months I was off orientation on my surgical floor. I barely had enough time for a bathroom break, let alone a lunch break. I stopped drinking water so I wouldn't have to pee all the time. Genius, right? I had a long talk with my unit educator one day, who assured me that a lot of nurses, including herself, go through a rough transition before they start learning how to better manage their time. She encouraged me to talk to my charge nurses to get active feedback and constructive criticism on how to plan out my night. That helped immensely. I also started eating better and exercising. My educator took me with her to a kickboxing class and it helped so much with my stress level. I still see her and a few other of my former coworkers at the gym and we have a great time.

Figure out how to manage your stress and anxiety. If that means sitting down with a therapist for an hour each week to talk things through, that's what it means. If it means spending a few hours at the gym each week kicking the crap out of a bag, that's what it means. I have a coworker that goes salsa dancing a few nights a week. Another one goes paintballing in the woods every week without fail. Find something that works for you and stick with it. Just take care of yourself and remember that in the prioritization hierarchy, your health always comes first, because if you collapse, then who takes care of your patients?

Lesson Five: Learn to forgive yourself.

You are human. You are not perfect. Accept it and embrace it. Your flaws make you who you are every bit as much as your strengths. This "dream job" didn't work out the way you wanted it to. Okay, time to pack up and find a new one. It may not be your dream, but is it a stepping stone, even a small one, towards your dream? Does it pay the bills? Yes? Great. Do it.

You're going to make mistakes. Accept them, learn from them and move on. As my grandmother was always fond of saying, "If you spend all your time looking back, you'll trip over yourself so much that you'll never get to where you want to go."

1 Votes

If you’re still on orientation a lot of jobs don’t care about two week notices because it’s more expensive and time consuming for them to keep training you than to just have you go.

I went through a similar experience. I don’t work acute care anymore and don’t want to do acute care ever again

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