gossip at work

KelRN215, BSN, RN · Apr 16, 2012

Unfortunately, I've found, that when you have a staff of 95% women, gossip is a given. I grew up in a small-ish town where everyone knew everyone and I thought I understood how bad gossip could be. Working in the hospital with a predominantly female staff, the gossip was way worse than high school. I don't even work there any more and I still find out all their gossip.

OCNRN63, RN · Apr 16, 2012

It's really tough to work in a place where there's so much gossiping. Sometimes it's just best to be polite and just focus on your work. No personal stuff; just keep it professional.

It would be nice if everybody played together nicely, but some environments just aren't like that.

LynnLRN · Apr 16, 2012

Ignore it, don't participate in it, don't give them a reason to gossip about you.

NocturneNrse · Apr 17, 2012

Yeah, it's everywhere. I try to stay neutral until I know the facts, and even then I do not gossip. I mind my own business. If someone tries to gossip w/me and get me on their side, all I say to their gossipin is "oh yeah?" "Oh" , that's all. Oftentimes if I know it's coming, I just pretend I don't hear them and keep on charting or whatever, then I'm like. "Huh".. "Sorry, I was stuck in this chart.".. they have stopped (for the most part) coming to me to gossip because they know I don't like mean-ness.

Just know that it goes on. Know that it's going to go on about YOU too. And keep your head high, don't get involved, and also know there is nothing that can change it. If you're worried about the manager hearing that gossip and believing the stories, go to her/him.. just say you've heard a lot of untrue gossip going on, and don't want to get involved.. What is HER suggestion on how to handle it? Might work. Then at least she'll/he'll know it's going on about everyone and that it's just b.s.

It sucks though... such cattiness. ICK!

joanna73, BSN, RN · Apr 17, 2012

Gossip is everywhere, and men can be just as guilty. I don't think gossiping is predominately female driven. Try not to engage in it. I have a rule: I wouldn't say anything about anyone behind their back that can't be said to their face. People generally know how I feel at work and otherwise. Remember that your sole purpose at work is to do the job and go home. That's it.

amoLucia · Apr 17, 2012

Trying to remain apart, quiet and/or outside of the gossip group may earn you the social misnomers of 'stuck up' or unfriendly. Management may view you as 'not a team player' who 'doesn't play welll with others'. All that has its own repercussive outcomes. A kind of "if you ain't wit' me, you be agin' me" type of mentality. Unfortunately, there's a large population of alpha female wanna-bees put there & all vying for the top spots. (Me, I'm just content to be in the background!) Sorry, there's no easy solution---just be civil and you can leave it all there when you go home.

destova · May 10, 2012

I was just talking to a friend about this. She has her own way of dealing with coworkers trying to gossip that seems pretty effective. Anytime someone starts complaining to her about a coworker, she asks them if they've talked to the subject about the complaint.

Gabby Gossip: SoAndSoCNA is too slow! She never gets my vitals to me on time, what is wrong with her?

Blunt Beth (my friend): Hmm, I've never had that problem with her, maybe she got behind with a needy patient. Have you talked to her about it?

Gabby Gossip: ......

Carrie Complainer: Ugh! SoAndSoRN always has her butt showing when she bends over! Why can't she get scrubs that fit right?!

Blunt Beth: That would be really embarrassing, have you mentioned it to her discreetly?

Carrie Complainer: ........

Her coworkers have quit coming to her with their gossip and complaints because they know she's going to ask what they've done to help fix the situation, which is usually nothing. Simple and brilliant :)

sauconyrunner · May 10, 2012

I was just talking to a friend about this. She has her own way of dealing with coworkers trying to gossip that seems pretty effective. Anytime someone starts complaining to her about a coworker, she asks them if they've talked to the subject about the complaint.
Gabby Gossip: SoAndSoCNA is too slow! She never gets my vitals to me on time, what is wrong with her?
Blunt Beth (my friend): Hmm, I've never had that problem with her, maybe she got behind with a needy patient. Have you talked to her about it?
Gabby Gossip: ......
Carrie Complainer: Ugh! SoAndSoRN always has her butt showing when she bends over! Why can't she get scrubs that fit right?!
Blunt Beth: That would be really embarrassing, have you mentioned it to her discreetly?
Carrie Complainer: ........
Her coworkers have quit coming to her with their gossip and complaints because they know she's going to ask what they've done to help fix the situation, which is usually nothing. Simple and brilliant :)

AWESOME!!!!!! my way to deal with it was to go "uh huh, oh" and after a while when no one got any response beyond that, they just stopped...

Do_Good · May 12, 2012

hmmm.....I too was the brunt of gossip at work, at a new job. I was a newbie among a group of people who had worked together for years. I am and still want to do things the right way....and so they gossip about me. I still stand strong in my conviction to be a good nurse and go by the book.

I also recently graduated from a grueling RN program. A lot of the students were in fear of being asked to leave at the drop of a hat (almost). Unfortunately, this fear factor caused me to fear for my job because even the boss at work was a cohort of the old employee group. And so, to make me feel better, I gossiped too to those who knew my work and work ethic; I felt safe with them. I regret having done so and it has now been many days since I have done so. I plan on being the nurse who does her job to the best of her ability, holds my head high, is professional in all my interactions and goes home to where I am loved for who I am...what they say about me at work won't change me again.

Maybe some others out there have done the same thing and regretted it....my advice...quit and be strong!! You can do it.

lovethyneighbor1 · Mar 30, 2014

Ive been there,

I remember being stuck by a needle once and it was a new needle( which I shouldn't have even reported) but "new nurse" :no:

I did, next thing i know a nurse on another floor came asking me about it, smh they all talk too much!! Just watch your back

Like you said keep to yourself.. its natural to want to share are be friends with co-workers but make sure they're not the same folks gossiping about others!

ktwlpn, LPN · Mar 30, 2014

QUOTE>>> i actually heard the charge nurse say something insulting and nasty about me to a [COLOR=#1c7dff]CNA

Others may not agree but my approach to that would have been an immediate confrontation,I would have taken that nurse aside and spoken to her in a professional manner.As for the rest,stay above it,keep your personal life private,be courteous and helpful do not enter into the backbiting festivities

jadelpn, LPN, EMT-B · Mar 31, 2014

If it is co-workers, I do make it clear that I have no desire to be "in the know". "I don't want to know" "Stuff like that makes me nuts! Don't tell me" or "Nurse SuchandSo has always helped me out, can't say a bad word about her" or the general "sounds like you are really upset about this. (and as a pp pointed out) you may want to have conversation with them about it".

And make it a point yourself to never say a bad word about a coworker.

However, that a charge nurse is engaging in this is really concerning and nasty. If there's an anon. incident reporting system, start reporting it. Otherwise, you may have to start looking for other employment.