GLBT Nurses

[TuckerBug]

Hey everyone---I'm a lesbian nurse in the Northwest, still a student but about to graduate. I'd love to hear from other queer nurses about whether you come out to your patients (if they ask if you're married and you have a partner, for example) or how you decide/deal with that. If another staff member asks, I tell them that I have a partner, but I'm not sure what to do with patients. Advice? No homophobic remarks please. TB

[gonzo1, ASN, RN]

Tuckerbug, Just remember that "it's all about the patient" and keep the focus on them. Most nurses don't have time to chat much with patients anyway. If a patient asks you outright tell them the truth if you feel it is appropriate. I have come to believe that the less the people you work with know about you the better it is. I have seen nurses display a lot of jealousy about other nurses and how big their house is or how much jewelry they have or how many cars they have so better to leave work at work and home at home. Let people judge you on your intellegence, work ethic and quality of patient care you provide.

[ONSnrs]

I have seen nurses display a lot of jealousy about other nurses and how big their house is or how much jewelry they have or how many cars they have so better to leave work at work and home at home. Let people judge you on your intellegence, work ethic and quality of patient care you provide.

.....So true Gonzo

[firstyearstudent]

I often wonder why gay people want to get married. Marriage is an institution that has so much sexist baggage. And let's not forget the divorce rate is 50%. I believe in free love and I'm partnered now with someone of the opposite sex for five years. I'd never consider getting married. I just don't get it. As far as benefits, etc., if we had gender equality and universal healthcare why would we even need it. I think if people want to get married, as some will, it should be a private or religious issue and it should mean whatever they agree it means. The government shouldn't recognize these types of unions. They should be negotiated between two people and perhaps their religious community -- for straight or gay people. Down with civil marriage!

[jrsimon82]

I am open everywhere I go, I have several stickers on my car, as well as a "dyke" haircut, but there are a lot of conservatives in the town I live in and my wedding ring (very pretty) draws quite a few comments. I usually just correct someone when they say husband and keep talking. I am honest with anyone who asks, but I don't believe that sharing personal information with a patient is a good idea, unless you feel that they would not make a big deal about it.

The divorce rate that someone pointed out is less than 50% and is more like 40%. I personally do not want to replicate a heterosexual marriage, but I want my wife to easily get my healthcare coverage, and I really want our kids to be adopted by both of us and that is not allowed in Michigan. Theres roughly 1100 rights you lose being married to someone to the same-sex and that affects nearly every aspect of life. I agree with the idea of government butting out of gay marriage whole-heartedly.

Back to the subject, I would like to work in OB/Post partum and If the lady giving birth was someone with a closed mind and knew I was gay, I could see that getting ugly. So basically keeping it to yourself,and sharing just with co-workers you have known awhile is probably safest.

[fascinoma]

To people who don't want to be asked about their personal lives or hit on... why not wear a wedding band? A lot of straight, single women wear wedding bands to work to avoid trouble. And of course if you exchange rings with your partner this is a no brainer :)